Ffs my dd just had friend's license confiscated!

[1lifeliveitright]

17 yr dd (18 next month) went out with a couple of friends tonight. In the 2nd bar she was asked for id and handed over a friend's provisional. The real document but it's not hers. Anyway it was taken off her and the bar man refused to give it back. Even after speaking to his supervisor. Dd left but now has no Id anymore and her friend has lost her actual license. I appreciate they have both committed an offence in doing this but how does she get it back?! I tried to warn her of the dangers of doing this but she's done it several times before and of course she knows best!

@Puffalicious

She will not go to prison, OP 🙄 nor will it affect her UCAS application 😆

The judgy crew are out in full force tonight. They're probably still uptight from their boring younger years🤣

I'll go out on a limb: I bought my DS 17 his fake ID. £45 and it's bloody good. I have no qualms at all. So sue me.

Who do you think you gave your details, and your DS's to in order to get that fake ID? Watch your bank account / credit card for 'extra' transactions.

@Viviennemary

Glad you think taking part in criminal activity is a big joke. She might not be so lucky next time she decides to break the law.

Yep, agreed.

I was a bit shocked at OP’s laissez-faire attitude towards this which has obviously rubbed off on her DD.

Some teenagers break the law re fake ID, some don’t. Even if it’s minor criminal activity I’d want my DD to be aware of possible consequences.

Depending on what venue she tried this on at if it were eg a West End one maybe they wouldn’t be so understanding.

@1lifeliveitright

Yes I meant has no 'fake' id anymore! I agree she's has her comeuppance but I feel for her as she's the only 1 not quite 18 yet. She hasn't dare tell the friend yet. Probably paying or going halves on a new one maybe the answer. God in a few weeks it won't be an issue but it did make me wonder are they allowed to keep it? What if it was actually hers? Dd and friend do look very similar hence why she's got away with it before.

OP is a bit casual about this, both could get convictions for attempting to supply alcohol to a minor, [ not sure of police wording IRL]. Did friend know? Did she instigate or merely assist? Conviction would have to be declared for a few years. Not trivial at all!

Friend goes into bar and says she lost it last night (or whenever) and did the cleaners find it or anyone hand it in? Easy peasy.

Your dd has NOT had her comeuppance. Her friend has.

The famous British attitude to alcohol:
"It's fine as long as you're not too drunk". Said the mother of a regular underage drinker.
No thoughts about the licence holder of the bars?

As someone who works in retail, I hate people like the OP and the PP who bought her DD fake ID. WE are the ones who get into trouble because of your terrible parenting, WE are the ones who may have to got to court if caught, WE are the ones with our job at risk, WE are the ones who risk a massive fine, WE are the ones abused because we refuse to sell alcohol. If you've ever read the posts on here about "I'm 25 and got refused alcohol because I had no ID" or called the shopworker a jobsworth, then we are as strict because of stuff like this.

Legally they can confiscate the ID.

www.gov.uk/government/news/new-guidance-to-help-pubs-clubs-and-shops-spot-fake-id

The new guidance will make it easier for those selling alcohol to understand the law, what ID is acceptable, how to spot fake ID documents and what to do when documents are confiscated, as well as providing practical examples of best practice from around the country. New posters aimed at raising awareness of the consequences involved in using false ID are also available to download from www.homeoffice.gov.uk/drugs/alcohol/

www.theukrules.co.uk/rules/legal/community/bouncer-laws.html#tasks

Checking patrons for proof of their identification. A bouncer can take your ID if they believe it to be altered in some way, counterfeit, or it fails to match the details of the person presenting it.

www.aylesburyvaledc.gov.uk/using-fake-or-false-ids-enter-clubs-and-pubs

Confiscation of the false/fake identification, even if the ID belongs to somebody else. The identification will then be sent back to the relevant agency. Those that lend their passport or driving licence to you will face the consequences of not being able to travel due to their passport being seized or having to pay for a new driving license.

Interesting thread. In the 1980s all it took were a couple of pound notes to get a drink. Anyway, some local authorities have 'test' under age people trying to get served and so bars do watch this carefully (local councils are the people who decide on licences). It depends where it is but the police are not likely to be very interested.

Main difficulty as someone has pointed out may be the time it takes for the new licence to be issued.

There was a thread about entitlement earlier this week and here we have an example. Your DD is annoyed she now no longer has fake ID and can't go out anymore. Her friend doesn't even live close by and isn't that fussed that someone far away had her provisional license. And you the adult think it's ok. As long as you all understand each other because I don't. In all honesty I have no idea what the purpose of this thread is.

@EmmaGrundyForPM

You, op, should make sure your daughter isn't drinking illegally in bars.

Yeah, because that's really easy to police isn't it? Just like our parents failed to stop us drinking in pubs underage....

I was also wondering exactly how to stop a nearly-18-yr old from "drinking illegally in bars".

I didn't drink underage because I had no interest at all in pubs or clubs at that age (still hate the idea). So I am not one of these cool people who did it themselves. However, I have a 17 yr old (Yr 13, so friends all turning 18) with someone else's provisional licence,. She has had it for a fair while now. I neither celebrate this nor condemn it.

If she ever gets caught out, I'm not bailing her out, but I'm not going to be sanctimonious either.

OP's DD should come clean to her friend. Friend can try to reclaim her licence with a white lie. If no luck, OP's DD has to buy her a new one.

Given DVLA waiting times I think reporting it lost might be problematic. Owner of the id needs to contact the bar obvs

As someone who works in retail, I hate people like the OP and the PP who bought her DD fake ID. WE are the ones who get into trouble because of your terrible parenting

Oh give over, it's nothing to do with terrible "parenting". These kids are 17, not 4. They've long stopped taking any notice of everything their parents say to them. Do you still do everything your mother told you?

And for goodness sake, if you take ID in good faith you cannot be prosecuted. I don't know what sort of training you receive in retail but they do talk a load of rubbish at times. Similar to the idea that a Sainsburys driver could be prosecuted for dropping off groceries with an under 18 (see other thread). No they could not. If they could, the wine company I buy from would not leave the wines on my doorstep when I am not in.

I had not realised that a civilian could confiscate someone else's ID - not sure I agree with it. However, I wonder if a bouncer would take ID off a big burly bloke. 17 year old girls are soft targets.

@ColinTheKoala

It's not sanctimony, it's realising that times have changed since we did it. They crack down strongly in selling to an underage person the barman/bar could receive a massive fine if they were caught accepting the ID

I think people are aware the laws are strict. So he says "no I'm not accepting that ID - have a cola instead" or something. It's the confiscation of the ID that overstepped the line.

Except he's not stupid and knows the ID is not dds. Why would he give it back?

@1lifeliveitright

Jesus some of these answers Dd told friend, friend doesn't care. She's already ordered another anyway. She doesn't even want money for a replacement despite dd offering. Friend isn't living in our town at the moment. Bar man has no idea who dd is so she definitely won't go to prison over this. Worst thing for dd now is she will have to wait a few more weeks until she can legally go. Then obviously avoid that bar. She's pissed off over that but it's tough! Most of her friend groups are older so dd is in the minority in them. She does have school friends who are younger but as soon as lockdown lifted she enjoyed going out with both older groups of friends on proper nights out. I don't blame her or mind. As long as she's home safely and not too drunk!

Well you're the one bleating about the dangers and handwringing about how she will get it back.

What a pointless thread.

Oh give over, it's nothing to do with terrible "parenting". These kids are 17, not 4. They've long stopped taking any notice of everything their parents say to them. Do you still do everything your mother told you?

A PP has said she was the one who bought it for her child.

@Puffalicious

She will not go to prison, OP 🙄 nor will it affect her UCAS application 😆

The judgy crew are out in full force tonight. They're probably still uptight from their boring younger years🤣

I'll go out on a limb: I bought my DS 17 his fake ID. £45 and it's bloody good. I have no qualms at all. So sue me.

What a great mother your son has. What’s next?

The job of the barman is to check I.D. if he does this he won't get in trouble even if it is fake. I check I.D every day. If I fail to do so I could lose my job, but unless it is very obviously fake I would not lose my job. Same as I would not lose my job for accepting a fake £50 as long as I had checked it and thought it was ok.

And for goodness sake, if you take ID in good faith you cannot be prosecuted. I don't know what sort of training you receive in retail but they do talk a load of rubbish at times. Similar to the idea that a Sainsburys driver could be prosecuted for dropping off groceries with an under 18 (see other thread). No they could not. If they could, the wine company I buy from would not leave the wines on my doorstep when I am not in.

I suppose this is true if you can prove due diligence. I mean who cares that you will have weeks/months of worry about losing your job or getting a fine, you will have to go to court, you will have consequences at your job and have an investigation done? As long as you're not prosecuted at the end of it then that's fine.

This is why I will never work in a shop that sells alcohol again, it's not worth it.

@1lifeliveitright

Yes I meant has no 'fake' id anymore! I agree she's has her comeuppance but I feel for her as she's the only 1 not quite 18 yet. She hasn't dare tell the friend yet. Probably paying or going halves on a new one maybe the answer. God in a few weeks it won't be an issue but it did make me wonder are they allowed to keep it? What if it was actually hers? Dd and friend do look very similar hence why she's got away with it before.

Jeez. Your daughter isn't old enough. It wasn't your daughters license to use. Why should her friend pay half? You sound very entitled!

Bloody hell, the bar man was right, they could personally get prosecuted but Jesus, we've all been there
Sit back and let them sort it out between them, it's part of growing up

@ColinTheKoala

As someone who works in retail, I hate people like the OP and the PP who bought her DD fake ID. WE are the ones who get into trouble because of your terrible parenting

Oh give over, it's nothing to do with terrible "parenting". These kids are 17, not 4. They've long stopped taking any notice of everything their parents say to them. Do you still do everything your mother told you?

And for goodness sake, if you take ID in good faith you cannot be prosecuted. I don't know what sort of training you receive in retail but they do talk a load of rubbish at times. Similar to the idea that a Sainsburys driver could be prosecuted for dropping off groceries with an under 18 (see other thread). No they could not. If they could, the wine company I buy from would not leave the wines on my doorstep when I am not in.

I had not realised that a civilian could confiscate someone else's ID - not sure I agree with it. However, I wonder if a bouncer would take ID off a big burly bloke. 17 year old girls are soft targets.

If a Sainsbury's driver is delivering shopping including age restricted products such as alcohol or knives to an under 18 and they have not asked to see ID then they can be prosecuted. My daughter used to have a job checking that delivery drivers were asking for ID.

An offence isn't not committed if the person who has purchased the alcohol etc is over 18 there just happened to be a child there. However due diligence must be performed on delivery to ensure the alcohol has been purchased by an over 18 and pretty much the only way to do that is to either ask for ID on delivery or perform credit/reference type checks to ensure the person does actually live at that address.

This link provides a summary www.hants.gov.uk/business/tradingstandards/businessadvice/underagesales/onlineagerestricted with a link to all the relevant legislation at the end

Worst thing for dd now is she will have to wait a few more weeks until she can legally go. Then obviously avoid that bar. She's pissed off over that but it's tough!

Why would she avoid that bar once she can legally drink? Doubtful the barman will remember her amongst the zillions of other arseholes he meets and once she's legal, if he does remember her, the worst he'll do is bar her.

Ha! one of my DC lent an underage friend a licence. Friend had it taken away. DC had driving test that week which couldn't be taken. Took another 4 years before with uni etc DC could actually take test which was limiting since out in the sticks.

@category12

Worst thing for dd now is she will have to wait a few more weeks until she can legally go. Then obviously avoid that bar. She's pissed off over that but it's tough!

Why would she avoid that bar once she can legally drink? Doubtful the barman will remember her amongst the zillions of other arseholes he meets and once she's legal, if he does remember her, the worst he'll do is bar her.

@category12 - referring to the teenage girl as an arsehole - charming!

There are some sanctimonious people on here. Did none of you ever have an underage drink or put a foot wrong as a teenager?

@PivotPivotPivottt

This happened to me when I was younger I let someone use my passport as ID. I had to go into the bar and collect it and it was a girl I knew that had confiscated it she told me I was lucky it was her as usually they would contact the police but as she recognised me on the passport she didn't contact them. I don't know if this is true or whether she just said it to make me realise what an idiot I was.

Yeah they usually contact police and hand it into them, the owner would have to go collect it and they'd be asked why they had it etc

This is a common tactic used in bars round here.

They send them back to the DVLA and the owner has to reapply.

Call the bar and ask what they've done with it.