Hen party and mum not invited

[rainonsunday]

Family member is getting married and they had a hen party, but nothing was arranged with the mum. No afternoon tea or anything non drinking etc.

Is this usual?

Depends on the relationship with the mum. I have a difficult history with my mum and didn’t have her at my hen

I love my mum, she’s pretty young and fun (58 but a youthful 58), we have a fantastic relationship but she’s not coming on my hen do in February.

I adore my mum and she wasn't invited to my hen party.

It depends on the activities and how much they cost and if the bride wants her mum there, surely? You can't expect a hen party to involve something sedate just so the mum can join in, if that's her thing. If they're going out to a club and that's not your thing then you just have to accept that.

Yes depends on how they get on with their Mum....all our family hen dos have included mums aunties and even grannies on occasions

You're supposed to invite your mum? Ooops!

If the bride and her mother get on it does seem odd. My DM and aunts are not big drinkers so the norm in my family is an afternoon/evening with closer female family from both sides then a separate more drink oriented session for friends.
But if they would never usually meet up or have lunch etc it could be anything from awkward to distressing for the bride to do something specific for her wedding.

I adore my mum and it didn’t occur to me to invite her to my lame & boozy hen.
What’s it to you? If you’re close to mum and/ or daughter you could arrange a daytime tea party.

I don't think any mums were at any hen dos I have been to. You just need to keep out of it I'm afraid.

Hen parties are for friends really not mums

Yes, very normal. Not been to any hen do where the mum or MIL are present.

That is unusual. I have never heard of a hen party where mums/MILS weren't invited.

I was at one last week and bride's granny was there.
Many mums of bride's these days are only in their 40s/50s and aren't quite ready for their dotage yet, nor would clutch their pearls at the odd blowup willy being banded about. I have 2 married daughters and went to their hen nights, and I don't think they would have dared suggested that a naice tea would have suited me better.

My mum openly said that she wouldn’t come on mine because she doesn’t like me! It was only a dinner! No wild partying.

That is unusual. I have never heard of a hen party where mums/MILS weren't invited
Oh God, I’m not inviting my MIL either… or my SIL’s, I’m literally just having friends.
I must be awful

I had my mum and my aunties at my hen and it was awesome, they absolutely loved it, even the laser tag and clubbing! I thought it was such a fab way to celebrate. But my cousin didn't have her mum or aunties so I think it really depends on the family. I also know people who have had a separate 'family' hen with afternoon tea or something instead of having their mum along for the main event.

@Yogawankonobi

So far I seem to be in the minority re mums at hen nights. I genuinely haven't been to one where the mums weren't there. I did bow out of the clubbing though.

I’d say it depends on the nature of the event. I’ve been to hen dos with mothers present and those without; neither felt odd. My cousin is getting married next year and is having a do with friends, plus a trip with the female members of the family.

From a MOG point of view my lovely daughter-in-law who lives with us just had a hen weekend with her bridesmaids, and a meal out with them (different days). Mob and myself went for a meal with the bride the day before the wedding, but it wasn’t a hen do, just a nice meal and chat before the big day.

I think that not inviting the mother of the bride is normal except in movies. Obviously some people do invite their mum on hen do”s but I don’t think it means anything if Mob is not invited.

I didn't even invite my sisters

Maybe it’s an age thing, the hen parties I attended were 20+ years ago.
The idea of a parent attending was unthinkable. It was close friends of the bride to be only.

How close are you? Could you not arrange a wee tea for mum, aunties and grannies?

@ScamTheSchool

You're supposed to invite your mum? Ooops!

Haha this.

Honestly I've never been to or known of a hen do which involved the brides mum or gran or mil.

Having said that I recently went on my niece's which was cocktails followed by dinner. It was lovely but rather sedate. Then MOB, MOG, the other aunt and I were packed off home while the young'uns carried on. I was quite miffed!

Last hen I went on I was mother of the groom. Myself and Mother of bride were last 2 standing at 4am.