Husband taking £400 spending money for 2 nights in Liverpool..aibu to think it's ridiculous?

[rachybarrr]

He has gone to Liverpool till Monday.
The hotel is paid for and includes breakfast.
He has taken £400 spending money.

He said "the bars are quite expensive down there"

So basically he is happy to potentially waste £400 on alcohol for two nights.

I'm annoyed and think it's pathetic
He said we are going for a nice meal tonight too.

£400 for two nights is just scandalous I think

For the record, I could afford to spend that in a weekend but it seems a bit OTT, you could definitely get by on less than that. Im guessing he's a heavy drinker or it takes a lot for him to get tipsy? Idk id feel like a prat if I spent £400 in one weekend just on food and drink.

You don’t need that amount in Liverpool unless dining at the top places which he isn’t. Seems high to me.

People seem to be hung up on taking cash- he's taking a card and he may not spend 400, also if he can afford to save 500 a month he's not going to eat in Burger King and sleep in a bloody Jury's Inn is he?!
Yes he's an arse for moaning about a 50 quid coat, tell him to piss off (unless your worried to, then you need to work on extricating yourself).
How often does he spend like this- is this a once in a blue moon spend or does he always spend big chunks of the savings? If so, separate account and keep your share safe.

I've only just picked up on the fact that the OP's dh is taking cash! Hmmm, why on earth would be do that? This would make me question what he really intends to do with the money?I

The the amount of money is a red herring.
Mine could take 4 grand and I wouldn't care why, I trust him that he'd have a good reason. (for the record he's way too careful with money and I'm the impulsive spender🤪).

The question is whether you trust him or worry if he's spending it on women, drugs, gambling....

And if the amount is a problem because you can't afford that frittered away on a weekend that's obviously a different issue.

honestly my first thought was that he is taking excess in case of emergencies and not because he intends to spend it all.
I'm projecting of course because that's what I would do.
that's why I take 8 t-shirts then end up using 2.

my second was that maybe he wants to treat whoever he's going with and/or just not worry about cash.

I can't gauge if it's too much money or not. I always take more money than I end up using.

It is sadly a long time since I was out in Liverpool, but Concert Square and Mathew Street are cheaper for drinks than the docks (Albert Dock). But I don't think it's about this particular trip and the money taken for the OP, it's about a sense of unfairness around the finances in general. I think saving £1K a month is a lot!

@notacooldad

It’ll cost that much to park in the Number One car park !!!

Don't I know it!!,😳

I think poster means the Liverpool One shopping centre car park. It's pricey.

Does he work and pay bills if he does he is entitled to a weekend away like you would be if you wanted to go away

Sounds about right if he is doing bag… all men do it when they are together weather we like it or not

Yes and no.
Depends on how much disposable income you have and who earns more. If I earned a lot more than him, I'd be annoyed. If it was the other way around, not so much. I would not be happy about him withdrawing it from the savings. It also depends on how often he spends a lot. My DH never buys anything for himself and I buy lots for myself so I would be fine with this. If you can afford it, go out and spoil yourself this weekend.

£400 does seem a lot but maybe he won't spend it all.

@Kikidoyouloveme66 what a load of shit 🙄🙄🙄

@Kikidoyouloveme66

Sounds about right if he is doing bag… all men do it when they are together weather we like it or not

Bit of a sweeping statement there?? I'd have to disagree with you on that one

Sounds about right

"doing bag"

what does that mean?

If you can afford it I don't find that at all unreasonable.

You don't want your hubby to be the only one being short or looking like a skin flint. He will need enough money to cover anything the group want to do. There's a casino too? I'm sure he will have some change. Full day of drinking with food stops will easily mount up.

@rachybarrr

We both probably put £500 in I pay the rent from my wages He pays the rest of the bills including his car payment /insurance /gas electric Then half each wages for food and rest goes into savings

What now?! Do your bills total an equal amount to the rent? If not you're paying out way more for his home life, and also for his social life, that doesn't seem to include you??!

That is a much bigger concern than the amount hes taken this weekend..... especially if he really gave you a hard time for a fifty quid jacket that will probably see you through a couple of years!

I'd defo start keeping some money to myself, if he wants an expensive lads weekend he can damn well pay for it himself!

@KitchenKrisis

Yes it's alot what else is he buying? Female company? Drugs?

Yes, this sprang to mind as well, unless his tastes run to Dom Perignon tomahawk steaks and a truffle salad.

Even with beer at £5-6 a pint, that's 80 pints of beer.

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba

"doing bag"

what does that mean?

Snorting cocaine

What’s your real problem?? Cause this isn’t it and your being way too controlling over his weekend away so I suspect it’s deeper

Well no doubt when you want to go away with the girls for a spa weekend you’ll be spending just as much!

@eightlivesdown

The savings account isn't really a savings account if he is spending it on weekends away. And it isn't really a joint account if he can spend £400 for a weekend away and you get grief for spending £50 on a jacket. He also sounds like a spender and you a saver ... except he spends a lot and objects to you spending a little, which is at best selfish.

As the spending money is clearly insufficient for your DH, reduce the amount you each contribute to the savings account. DH can fund his away days from the extra spending money, and you can do likewise. Or as you spend less, put your unspent money in a separate savings account, or better still a pension.

The reduced money that goes into the savings account should be genuine savings, not a days out fund for DH. After it's grown to a certain size - 6 months / 1 year disposable income or whatever amount you feel comfortable with as a safety buffer, the rest could go into an ISA / pension. Or be saved for as deposit for a house as you're renting - and if you are saving for a house deposit, I'd prioritise this over DH having weekends away.

Completely agree with this! Does seem unbalanced so can understand ops frustration. Also think 400 for 2 nights is very steep, maybe 300 tops with prices increasing. Me and hubby can last on 100 joint if we’re out for an evening

Well it’s a shithole but it’s not that expensive
Full of lads (and overdressed women) on Coke though
Probably why he wants to take so much

I agree with the OP it's well OTT

with the exception of
an event so he wants to treat someone

or (as previously mentioned)

an... escort (not a Ford)

Sorry probably not the reply you'd like.