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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Was DH BU to hand in his notice

193 replies

NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 09:21

DH works driving HGVs.

Recently, he's fallen ill with a chest infection type illness with a spiking temperature and was caught up in the PCR fuckup so was was alarmed to hear that his negative might not have been a negative. He had Covid in the first wave, and is scared to get it again as he's asthmatic. He told work, who had been bastards about him being ill anyway, "bantering" about him drinking lemsip and using his inhalers, and the boss made him think his job was in jeopardy if he took time off for illness, so he had been working through it. He came home on his break and I helped him take a lateral flow and it had a line. Not glaringly bright but clearly there. He told work as soon as he got back to the yard, where he had to go to return the work vehicle. They marched him to the office and made him take multiple lateral flow tests, saying it was company policy. He said he didn't want to take them, he'd already taken one and he didn't know what taking four at once would show, even if they were all negative, he had one positive and had been asked to retake his PCR, he has symptoms, he needs to go home! And, reason I have to help him take them is because he's got such a sensitive gag reflex that he panics doing it himself and that can set off an asthma attack.

Why make him take multiple?? Three were positive, one was negative. They held up the negative and called him a bullshitter, because he's already had Covid and you can't get it again. DH said "sorry, but I'm already feeling ill and one negative test doesn't count out the four positives I've had today. I need to go home, take a PCR and you all should probably take one as well."

They refused to let him go home and told him if he did, he'd lose his job! We have three kids to support. DH reluctantly drove for the rest of the day and then came home. He looked awful, he had a fever again and he emailed in to work (their preferred method) and said he would not come in the next day, he needed to take a PCR and he felt too ill to be behind the wheel of a huge vehicle.

They went mental. Messaging his personal phone, telling him he's expected in regardless, that they'll instigate a disciplinary if he doesn't, etc. Probably because they couldn't get another driver on short notice.

DH responded by handing in his notice, saying he wasn't working for people who treat their staff this way. He's an HGV driver, so can quite obviously get another job pretty fast. They've left a voicemail calling him spiteful and unprofessional and saying they won't give him a reference, he was incredibly unreasonable to quit and if he has a problem he should go down the grievance route.

Was he BU? Because I don't bloody think so! But maybe it's because I'm too annoyed on his behalf.

OP posts:
StepAwayFromGoogling · 22/10/2021 21:46

Constructive dismissal? I'd be giving that a punt.

BlowDryRat · 22/10/2021 21:55

Keep all voicemails, messages and emails. Write down what happened.

Check whether his notice period takes him over 2 years.

I hope he feels better after a good sleep.

stillonthattightrope · 22/10/2021 22:11

I'm really sorry your husband is feeling so poorly and is being harassed by work.

However, it's brilliant that these arseholes are doing this on voicemail and text.

OP back up everything, save to the cloud or whatever because you need this evidence.

I hope he's feeling better soon.

NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 22:46

@BlowDryRat

Keep all voicemails, messages and emails. Write down what happened.

Check whether his notice period takes him over 2 years.

I hope he feels better after a good sleep.

It doesn't, he's five weeks short. He says he doesn't want to take them to a tribunal or anything, they've caused enough stress. I think he just feels humiliated and upset right now. He has reported to HSE- well, I have on his behalf, and he sent everything to HR: I think that pretty much wiped him out, he's been sleeping lots
OP posts:
Phoenix76 · 22/10/2021 23:06

I’m so sorry he’s gone through all that, I don’t know him but feel really proud of him while hoping he recovers soon. I work with a lot of hgv drivers (along the lines of builders merchant) and they’re bloody heroes and also in very short supply (they’ve been desperately trying to get hold of more drivers as have our suppliers). I know it’s little consolation that he’s left as you have bills to pay etc but he will get another job (once recovered) quickly. I imagine the fact his employers are panicking is for that reason but talk about going about it the wrong way! They’ve behaved appallingly, I’m fuming on your behalf. If the hse knew what they were doing they’d be in boiling water (I appreciate he doesn’t want to go down that road).
I hate the way drivers are treated, it makes me feel sick. If it weren’t for them this country would be fucked beyond measure. I really hope he gets well soon, there are other nasty bugs doing the rounds at the moment and it doesn’t matter which one he has he absolutely should not be driving. If you’re in the SE please pm me and I’ll happily pass his details on to our transport company if he needs it (highly doubt he will as he’ll be in demand).

TSSDNCOP · 22/10/2021 23:07

Assuming DH has a contract he may be able to prove constructive dismissal on the grounds of the bullying and unsafe working practice.

CD cases are hard to prove, but clearly he had a positive COVID test and needed to SI pending a PCR. Demanding he work driving heavy machinery when displaying symptoms would probably be construed as unsafe from a health and safety perspective.

The issue is that he's been there less than two years, and he didn't attempt to resolve the grievance eg escalating to higher management or HR before resigning.

UndertheCedartree · 22/10/2021 23:19

The company sounds dreadful but I don't understand why once he knew it was likely he had Covid he carried on working if ultimately he could get another job easily, but it was unlikely he would be sacked anyway due to demand. And why he worked driving a HGV with a fever?! All sounds incredibly dangerous.

NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 23:39

@UndertheCedartree

The company sounds dreadful but I don't understand why once he knew it was likely he had Covid he carried on working if ultimately he could get another job easily, but it was unlikely he would be sacked anyway due to demand. And why he worked driving a HGV with a fever?! All sounds incredibly dangerous.
With all due respect, you don't need to understand. I could go into the why's and wherefores of the situation he found himself in and explain why he didn't just simply walk out and say he was isolating and they could like it or fuck themselves but I don't think it's going too far to suggest that at the minimum, most people would find it very difficult to argue with an aggressive manager
OP posts:
NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 23:40

@Phoenix76

I’m so sorry he’s gone through all that, I don’t know him but feel really proud of him while hoping he recovers soon. I work with a lot of hgv drivers (along the lines of builders merchant) and they’re bloody heroes and also in very short supply (they’ve been desperately trying to get hold of more drivers as have our suppliers). I know it’s little consolation that he’s left as you have bills to pay etc but he will get another job (once recovered) quickly. I imagine the fact his employers are panicking is for that reason but talk about going about it the wrong way! They’ve behaved appallingly, I’m fuming on your behalf. If the hse knew what they were doing they’d be in boiling water (I appreciate he doesn’t want to go down that road). I hate the way drivers are treated, it makes me feel sick. If it weren’t for them this country would be fucked beyond measure. I really hope he gets well soon, there are other nasty bugs doing the rounds at the moment and it doesn’t matter which one he has he absolutely should not be driving. If you’re in the SE please pm me and I’ll happily pass his details on to our transport company if he needs it (highly doubt he will as he’ll be in demand).
Thank you, that's really kind but we are in the south west! Thanks so much anyway ❤️
OP posts:
UndertheCedartree · 22/10/2021 23:44

@NelsonMandelaHouse - well, you asked the question. Was he unreasonable of course not! As you say no problem getting a new job and he is seriously unwell. The only thing unreasonable is that he didn't do it sooner.

UndertheCedartree · 22/10/2021 23:47

Especially as he has 3 DC and he risked his life (and others)! I'm not meaning to be horrible but maybe this should put things into perspective for him. He did all that for a company that were really, really not worth it to say the least! He should see himself and his family as having much more worth.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 23/10/2021 07:14

Even though he is out of time for constructive dismissal the messages will probably be enough for get HR to make sure he gets a standard reference.

More importantly, I hope he recovers very soon.

PackedintheUK · 23/10/2021 07:20

They don't get to tell him whether he's well enough to work, that's a decision he makes. He should have just taken the sick leave he needed at the outset, regardless of what they said. It was irresponsible of him to keep working while positive, but I understand why he did.

catgirl1976 · 23/10/2021 09:04

Although he has less than two years service (though do check his notice). He could look at a S44 claim. He has the right to remove himself from the workplace without detriment if he reasonably believes there is a significant and imminent danger to his health. Unsure how his resignation affect this go and see a solicitor. Your home insurance may cover any legal fees so check that too

Mumontour85 · 23/10/2021 17:37

I would probably have told them to go f themselves long before your hubby did!! I think he held in there like a champ!

NelsonMandelaHouse · 23/10/2021 17:41

His PCR has come back negative and he's been seen at urgent care. He has a chest infection and has been given antibiotics and two new inhalers. They said they're seeing a lot of patients with nasty chest infections at the moment.

I'm not sure I trust the PCR- he had several positive lateral flows. Either way though, his symptoms are classic ones that PHE want you to isolate ahead of a test result for, and even if not Covid, is nasty enough to not want to spread and not to be able to drive. Today one of the children has developed a fever and I've got a horrible headache. There's a lot more going around than would ordinarily be, and I'm furious that he was made to feel like Covid is the only acceptable thing to have time off for, and that he was some sort of liar around the lat flow tests.

He's been called about three different jobs today, all desperate for him to interview and start next week. So he's feeling quite happy about that, at least- health permitting of course

OP posts:
Shona52 · 23/10/2021 17:47

This would be classed as unfair dismissal under the law. I would be seeking legal advise for this as he's work was way out of line and breaking g the law

LuaDipa · 23/10/2021 17:48

Your dh was not bu, his employers were.

I have no doubt that he will walk into another better job in no time with it without a reference as drivers are in such short supply. The only good thing to come from this situation is that these awful companies will be forced to do better as there are a plethora of jobs available in businesses with a much kinder culture.

helibirdcomp · 23/10/2021 17:48

Keep copies of any texts, letters and voice mails. Write everything down now while you remember with dates times and who said waht and who else was present I think there is definately a case for constructive dismissal but then I'm not a lawyer

ChelleMum85 · 23/10/2021 17:53

I work for the DWP....this is abuse, bullying, unfair dismissal, discrimination etc please for the love of God...contact ACAS!!!!

Ormally · 23/10/2021 18:05

This is a strange tangent to throw in here...but are/were the LFT results reported through the usual site? No problem with reporting the one from home, but surely having 5 results and having notifications in connection with reporting those has to count for something? And again another angle on evidence you are keeping.

I hope he feels ok before long.

TinselTinsel · 23/10/2021 18:37

What a horrible company to work for! I hope they get named and shamed at some point.

Unsure33 · 23/10/2021 18:45

Please make sure when he joins his new job he joins a union immediately. And tbh I would think he has a case for constructive dismissal . And it would cost him nothing to pursue it .

CauliflowerBalti · 23/10/2021 18:45

Definitely talk to ACAS on Monday. And he’ll walk into another job once he’s well. I hope you all feel better soon.