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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Was DH BU to hand in his notice

193 replies

NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 09:21

DH works driving HGVs.

Recently, he's fallen ill with a chest infection type illness with a spiking temperature and was caught up in the PCR fuckup so was was alarmed to hear that his negative might not have been a negative. He had Covid in the first wave, and is scared to get it again as he's asthmatic. He told work, who had been bastards about him being ill anyway, "bantering" about him drinking lemsip and using his inhalers, and the boss made him think his job was in jeopardy if he took time off for illness, so he had been working through it. He came home on his break and I helped him take a lateral flow and it had a line. Not glaringly bright but clearly there. He told work as soon as he got back to the yard, where he had to go to return the work vehicle. They marched him to the office and made him take multiple lateral flow tests, saying it was company policy. He said he didn't want to take them, he'd already taken one and he didn't know what taking four at once would show, even if they were all negative, he had one positive and had been asked to retake his PCR, he has symptoms, he needs to go home! And, reason I have to help him take them is because he's got such a sensitive gag reflex that he panics doing it himself and that can set off an asthma attack.

Why make him take multiple?? Three were positive, one was negative. They held up the negative and called him a bullshitter, because he's already had Covid and you can't get it again. DH said "sorry, but I'm already feeling ill and one negative test doesn't count out the four positives I've had today. I need to go home, take a PCR and you all should probably take one as well."

They refused to let him go home and told him if he did, he'd lose his job! We have three kids to support. DH reluctantly drove for the rest of the day and then came home. He looked awful, he had a fever again and he emailed in to work (their preferred method) and said he would not come in the next day, he needed to take a PCR and he felt too ill to be behind the wheel of a huge vehicle.

They went mental. Messaging his personal phone, telling him he's expected in regardless, that they'll instigate a disciplinary if he doesn't, etc. Probably because they couldn't get another driver on short notice.

DH responded by handing in his notice, saying he wasn't working for people who treat their staff this way. He's an HGV driver, so can quite obviously get another job pretty fast. They've left a voicemail calling him spiteful and unprofessional and saying they won't give him a reference, he was incredibly unreasonable to quit and if he has a problem he should go down the grievance route.

Was he BU? Because I don't bloody think so! But maybe it's because I'm too annoyed on his behalf.

OP posts:
Pendore · 22/10/2021 14:08

This is a shocking way to treat an employee! Also, the employer’s attitude towards safety, not just your DH but towards members of the public, is extremely worrying. If an HGV drivers says they don’t feel safe driving behind the wheel of a big vehicle they should not be bullied into working. Imagine if god forbid he crashed his vehicle and countless people ended up dying or injured? It’s attitudes like this that leave to massive accidents.

Please save all those messages and report the company to the health and safety executive.

CecilieRose · 22/10/2021 14:10

No, they treated him terribly and put other people at risk. I would report them. And joke's on them because HGV drivers are in great demand now. He should take his time to rest and recover and then get a new job, hopefully with better bosses than those people.

Pendore · 22/10/2021 14:10

Ps a big well done to your DH for standing his ground and not driving when sick. I hope he gets better and gets a new job soon.

ILoveAllRainbowsx · 22/10/2021 14:58

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

mrstea301 · 22/10/2021 15:01

No, absolutely not!

My dad was an HGV driver and he moved companies frequently, sometimes he'd fancy a change or sometimes he'd fall out with someone etc. Never an issue and he was never out of work in all the time I can remember.

BoredZelda · 22/10/2021 15:02

The number of sites DH has been to that won't let him use a toilet or get a cup of coffee from their FREE machine is shocking.

And illegal.

itsasmallworldafterall · 22/10/2021 17:40

@takenforgrantednana
Thanks, I looked it up but it was dissolved in 2007, can see 2 more though URTU and Unite, no idea how effective it is to be in a union as a HGV driver.

SirChenjins · 22/10/2021 17:45

Hell no - well done your DH for sticking it to them. What an awful company.
Hope he’s feeling better soon and he gets another job v soon with a much better company.

itsasmallworldafterall · 22/10/2021 17:45

I wish you could say the company, is it a hiab he uses?

takenforgrantednana · 22/10/2021 17:46

[quote itsasmallworldafterall]@takenforgrantednana
Thanks, I looked it up but it was dissolved in 2007, can see 2 more though URTU and Unite, no idea how effective it is to be in a union as a HGV driver.[/quote]
@itsasmallworldafterall no idea how effective any union is to be honest because the tgwu was a complete waste of time, i know one of the companies i worked for the union guy (driver) was too well in with the staff in the office, IYCWIM? tongue and brown would be used in that sentance you fill the rest in

itsasmallworldafterall · 22/10/2021 18:08

@takenforgrantednana
Yeah, I could guess that, shame as it seems like an area that could really benefit from it, too many terrible employers not following the rules

LookItsMeAgain · 22/10/2021 18:27

I am sorry that your husband is so ill @NelsonMandelaHouse. I do hope that he makes a full recovery. He most definitely was not being unreasonable in handing in his notice.

As for his employer saying that because he was off sick, he was leaving them all in the shit, I think that is very very unfair. It's not because your DH is unwell that the deliveries won't be made. There is a massive shortage of HGV drivers, full stop. Had his or any company invested in a decent hiring system where people could be trained to drive a HGV or have part of the cost of driving lessons off-set by their employer I don't think we'd be in the situation we're in now.

I do hope he makes a full recovery.

justasking111 · 22/10/2021 19:15

Good legal advice on here. It might be an idea to start a thread asking which companies are good to work for HGV wise and apply for those. In the meantime he needs to rest. The legal things will happen in their own time

NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 20:35

He's had a text message this evening practically demanding he show up fit for yard work on Monday. Ummmm, no. Firstly. He's not employed to work in the yard? He's a driver. Secondly. HE IS ILL!!!

We have all taken PCR tests and don't have the results yet. But regardless. Even if they come back negative. He's shivering at 102 degrees, coughing, no appetite, sleeping, almost crying with the pain in his head. He's unlikely to be fit for work!

OP posts:
itsasmallworldafterall · 22/10/2021 20:38

God, they are mental. Just reinforces the need to get a job elsewhere

itsasmallworldafterall · 22/10/2021 20:40

Can you block them? Last thing your husband needs now is more stress from them.

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 22/10/2021 20:47

Jesus. It sounds like a prison sentence. I don't know how he is managing to restrain himself from telling them to go fuck themselves!

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 22/10/2021 20:48

I would personally call 111 if he is as bad as you say, as he might have a bacterial infection.

billy1966 · 22/10/2021 20:48

Nothing to add, but your poor husband and poor you having this awful additional stress.

Shameful.

NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 21:28

@TakemedowntoPotatoCity

I would personally call 111 if he is as bad as you say, as he might have a bacterial infection.
We have, they want him to wait for his PCR result before going to urgent care. Apparently he can call an ambulance if he starts to feel breathless, but that's not comforting, given patients in this area are waiting outside the hospital for 13 hours in ambulances.
OP posts:
NelsonMandelaHouse · 22/10/2021 21:29

@itsasmallworldafterall

Can you block them? Last thing your husband needs now is more stress from them.
Good plan. He's asleep right now so I might just do it now and save him the weighing up as to whether he should or not.
OP posts:
justasking111 · 22/10/2021 21:32

This is harassment they're hanging themselves with these texts. Just take care of him now

MadeItOut21 · 22/10/2021 21:35

Your poor DH, that sounds unbelievably stressful. I have a close relative who is an HGV driver in mainland Europe. He came to the UK about 4 years ago because the wages are higher. He lasted just under 6 months and went back home to work for his previous company. The money was only marginally better considering the cost of living and he was treated like SCUM. He said he felt humiliated and looked down on on a daily basis. This is a man with 15 years of experience as a driver as well, not some young one who's never had a job. A lot of drivers are reluctant to come to the UK for that reason and the fact that facilities for HGV drivers are about 20 years behind facilities in Germany.

LibrariesGiveUsPower45321 · 22/10/2021 21:37

Constructive dismissal for sure, talk to acad/union asap. I’d go to employment tribunal.

On the positive side, he won’t want for a new job.

ThinWomansBrain · 22/10/2021 21:43

His employers sound mental - who'd want to work for unprofessional twats like that.
Once his health has improved, his skills are much in demand, so he should be able to sort a new role with an organisation with an improved culture.

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