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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have left them outside for 10 minutes

488 replies

Notoday · 20/10/2021 15:29

I'm a few days away from having a cesarian. I'm having to take some suppressant medication that makes me poorly, so that's fun. I've spent the last week between the bed and the bathroom.

My partner who lives with me went to collect his kids from school and bring them here but he didn't take his keys with him as usual thus leaving the door unlocked.

Naturally if I'm stuck on the toilet or vomiting into a bowl I'm not going to want to leave my door unlocked as I live on a main road, so I locked it until he gets back.

Typically they arrive back when I'm stuck in the bathroom. I couldn't do much about that unfortunately so they had to wait 10 minutes or so until I was able to go and let them in.

DP comes in doing a silly dance saying how much he's bursting for a wee and his youngest DC is majorly pissed off about having to wait outside for so long.

WIBU to have locked the door and made them wait as opposed to leaving the toilet to open the door? Confused

OP posts:
ShirleyPhallus · 20/10/2021 16:18

Did he hold his willy while he was doing this silly dance, like a five year old?

Funnylittlefloozie · 20/10/2021 16:19

What kind of idiot "grown up" leaves the house without their keys? That's just stupid.

Reallyimeanreally2022 · 20/10/2021 16:19

Seriously
You live somewhere where leaving your door unlocked for 10 minutes presented a serious risk to an opportunistic thief trying to open your door?

Geamhradh · 20/10/2021 16:20

Yes he should have taken his keys, no you shouldn't have leapt up and gone running.
But you do sound a bit like you think being about to give birth makes you a bit unique. And there's no need to be arsey with people on here.

choosername1234 · 20/10/2021 16:20

If you were vomiting into the loo he couldn't have had a wee anyway (unless you have 2 loos but that spoils my logic)

Rainbowheart1 · 20/10/2021 16:21

When you say unlocked do you mean it can be opened from the outside by anyone? Does your door not simply close?

Artie30 · 20/10/2021 16:23

Remind your partner to take his key with him next time.

shouldistop · 20/10/2021 16:24

@Rainbowheart1 not everyone has a yale lock. Both of my doors need to be locked with a key.

Original poster
Notoday · 20/10/2021 16:26

I live in a rough area, renown for crime and drug addicts unfortunately. I've been burgled once in the past already so that likely makes me alot more wary about an unsecured home.

If I could have left the toilet to let them in quickly then rush back then I absolutely would have, it wasn't an option.

OP posts:
Original poster
Notoday · 20/10/2021 16:26

@shouldistop

I love how his son has concluded that I'm the problem though

How old is his son?

12
OP posts:
FlowerArranger · 20/10/2021 16:26

@shouldistop

I love how his son has concluded that I'm the problem though

How old is his son?

Is your stepson the real issue, @Notoday ?
Original poster
Notoday · 20/10/2021 16:27

@Rainbowheart1

When you say unlocked do you mean it can be opened from the outside by anyone? Does your door not simply close?
It closes yes but anybody trying the handle would have been able to just stroll in if it were left how he left it.
OP posts:
Karwomannghia · 20/10/2021 16:28

I voted YABU as we’ll leave the door unlocked while nipping out but didn’t appreciate you lived in a risky area. I thought it was more about the feeling of vulnerability being in the loo. Saying that not much you can do about your dp needing the loo at the same time!

Original poster
Notoday · 20/10/2021 16:28

Is your stepson the real issue?

No it's his father who despite me asking him 100 times, never takes his keys with him.

OP posts:
TheChip · 20/10/2021 16:30

If you knew he didn't have his key, then it would have been better to leave the door unlocked.
I also don't take my key if I know someone is in.

Original poster
Notoday · 20/10/2021 16:30

@Geamhradh

Yes he should have taken his keys, no you shouldn't have leapt up and gone running. But you do sound a bit like you think being about to give birth makes you a bit unique. And there's no need to be arsey with people on here.
Not at all, but I am quite ill and expect a bit of consideration from DP. Nobody else.
OP posts:
Original poster
Notoday · 20/10/2021 16:31

@TheChip

If you knew he didn't have his key, then it would have been better to leave the door unlocked. I also don't take my key if I know someone is in.
I live in Catford (see a previous thread a month or so ago about the local antisocial behaviour, drug users, crime etc)

I don't think anybody leaves their doors unlocked around here lol.

OP posts:
CheshireChat · 20/10/2021 16:33

Your DP should've just said to his son it's his own fault for forgetting the keys so the issue is with him.

I always leave the door locked unless I'm in the yard or similar as well.

@kateg27 what should she do though as presumably she didn't know he didn't take his keys? Not as if you can control when you're sick either.

TheChip · 20/10/2021 16:33

So what's the point in this post then? If you're completely convinced that you are not being unreasonable.

Original poster
Notoday · 20/10/2021 16:36

@TheChip

So what's the point in this post then? If you're completely convinced that you are not being unreasonable.
The point is to see what others think, I thought that much was clear. As far as I was aware that doesn't come with an obligation to change my mind.

I'm very much in the camp that it's DP's doing, especially as I've asked him many times to take his keys with him.

OP posts:
itsgettingwierd · 20/10/2021 16:36

@Orcadianrythyms

Grown up take their keys!
Needs no more responses than this one!
621CustardCream438 · 20/10/2021 16:37

If he’s old enough and responsible enough procreate he’s old and responsible enough to remember and use a set of keys like an adult, unless he has a disability you haven’t mentioned. What if you’d had to go out?

NormanStangerson · 20/10/2021 16:38

And another thread turns nasty so quickly, yet again.

The OP is ill, nine months pregnant, was on the loo with diarrhoea, her partner forgot his front door keys again and STILL people conclude that the OP must be in the wrong, and must therefore take a verbal kicking.

Jesus.

itsgettingwierd · 20/10/2021 16:39

@NormanStangerson

And another thread turns nasty so quickly, yet again.

The OP is ill, nine months pregnant, was on the loo with diarrhoea, her partner forgot his front door keys again and STILL people conclude that the OP must be in the wrong, and must therefore take a verbal kicking.

Jesus.

I sometimes think some posters read different posts to me on the same thread.

I agree with you.

AutumnLeafy · 20/10/2021 16:40

You're about to have a baby. He should have taken is keys in case you'd had to leave suddenly for a start. You've done nothing wrong and he's making a fuss about nothing.