To ring missing friends workplace to find out if she's okay?

[paribythelake]

NC for this.

So a very close friend has gone missing
She did message me to ask me to unfollow one of her family members that followed me due to some family drama so I did.

She's a junior doctor so very busy and I went to whatsapp her. And her profile pic disappeared and one tick.
On social media her profiles have disappeared, and her mother's too.
Linked in everything has gone.

There is literal no trace of their online presence ever.

Now I don't know if I should drive to her house and knock on or ring her place of work and ask (tbhI don't know what I would say)

So would I be unreasonable to do this? I'm quite worried.

I'm not going to run off but be putting children to bed (way past their bedtime) so will come back shortly

It just seems such a very odd way for a professional woman to behave unless there is a very big back story.

Family drama can be dealt with in other less drastic ways than to simply disappear. There must have been an implied threat or other issues which have prompted this chain of events.

I would have to settle my mind that she was safe OP. I would go back to the house and speak to the Aunt. Explain you are uneasy about the situation and that a phone call from your friend would ease the nagging doubt that there is something more to the story than is being shared.

Emphasise that you do not need to know her whereabouts, but that you simply need to hear her tell you that she is fine and happy.

If the Aunt cannot facilitate that then I would take it further and contact the police.

Family drama can be dealt with in other less drastic ways than to simply disappear. There must have been an implied threat or other issues which have prompted this chain of events. unless she wanted the OP to think that it was a family drama.

Telling her to block a family member who had followed her, claiming she was trying to ruin her could all be setting things up for the OP to believe she’d gone off radar because of a family drama, when it could have been something else, a crime, or helping someone else run from a crime, debt, etc.

If the OP thought she was getting away from a family drama then she might be less suspicious of her disappearance.

If she’d committed a crime and had just disappeared there would be no explanation.

Saying you will report a missing person to the poice is not a threat. If everything is fine the "aunt" (any proof she is that?) who is emptying the house has nothing to worry about. It is only a "threat" is something illegal is going on.

Saying you will report a missing person to the poice is not a threat. If everything is fine the "aunt" (any proof she is that?) who is emptying the house has nothing to worry about. It is only a "threat" is something illegal is going on. of course it is.

The woman has told her aunt she doesn’t want anyone to know where she is and the aunt has respected that.

So are you saying that if someone turns up and says that if the aunt doesn’t tell them where she is or let them speak to her then they will report her missing to the police is perfectly acceptable?

Where do we draw that line?

if a woman is, for instance, escaping an abusive relationship and doesn’t want people to know where she is, is it ok to turn up at the house demanding to know or else reports will be made to the police?

The aunt has no obligation to put the OP in touch with this woman. And she has no obligation to divulge her whereabouts based on threats of going to the police.

if the OP wants to go to the police then she should go to the police. It’s not up to her to start putting pressure on the aunt to breach her friend’s privacy.