Page 11 | To ask what it's like to not have to worry about money?

dailydreamin · 2021-10-17T20:12:49+00:00

I was chatting with my dh about winning the lotto (as you do) then it got us to thinking because we don't earn much really. What is it like to just have a really good wage (like 4-5k or more per month) and have no money worries? I would love to just go food shopping without adding in my head. I would love to just be able to see the DC's shoes are getting tight and go and buy new shoes for them without stressing about what I will have to forgo. So what is it really like? Is it like I think? Do you just NOT think about money at all? Do you just buy as you need (obviously everyone has their limits though) without thinking?

Sunshinealligator · 18/10/2021 23:15

That sort of money can go very very far, or nowhere.
Depends very much on the attitude of whoever is in charge of that sort of money.
Both myself and DH earn that sort of money, as do many of our colleagues.

One lives in a van, and gives himself £2.80 a day for food and wears the same clothes all week, gambles his money away.

My DH is horrific with money, never has money for bills- because there's no requirement to juggle with numbers, he always assumes he can make up for shit spending later. He is also of the opinion that its not that much money.

I on the other hand, manage to pay a larger chunk of our bills (necessity requires it!) I pay for bulk of our treats, I save about 50% which comes out for things like holidays and home improvements. It's possible to have a really good standard of living on that sort of money, but people who are used to it tend to lose sight of how lucky they are and lose focus on having a budget.

YerAWizardHarry · 18/10/2021 23:20

@JaninaDuszejko I earn £42,000 and take home MUCH less than £4-5K a month- closer to £2.5K than £3K actually

pinkmink · 18/10/2021 23:22

@Aquamarine1029

Not having to worry about money is definitely not just about how much money you make. Many, many people with high salaries spend far too much money and are massively in debt, so they are basically living paycheck to paycheck. Some people's supposedly perfect lives are very misleading.

I don't have money concerns and it is wonderful, I admit, but my husband and I are also very sensible and couldn't care less about "things" and having all the new, fancy stuff. I buy what I need without thinking, but it's actually stuff I need, not just want. If something isn't a necessity, I do think before I buy, even though I don't necessarily need to. I really don't like wasting money.

I remember very, very well being an absolutely skint 20-ish year old, living on my own and just trying to get through each day whilst building up my career.

This is so true. I earn a good salary but I think I spend too much.

I feel ashamed that people are truly struggling and I’m spending £70 on dinner, when I don’t even have what I’d consider to be a sensible safety net of savings.

I guess for me the feeling of not having to worry about money is the privilege of knowing that even though I’m spending my money poorly at times, I will have a roof over my head and food in the fridge.

user1471604848 · 18/10/2021 23:34

4-5k a month doesn't necessarily mean you're well off.
My childcare bill is €2600 a month plus mortgage of €2100 a month (for a standard 3-bed semi). So €4.7k a month before paying bills or buying food.

Luckily I've a good salary, but I still count the cost of groceries in my head as I go around the shop, so I know approx how much it'll be. My car is 14 years old.
But it definitely is a stress-reliever to know I have a buffer if the boiler breaks, and can pay yearly bills (like house and car insurance) without having to save up for them.

AdmiralCain · 19/10/2021 09:25

thatwastheriver I'm very sorry to hear about your Daughter and what you're going through at the moment.

ToffeeNotCoffee · 19/10/2021 09:50

That sort of money can go very very far, or nowhere.
Depends very much on the attitude of whoever is in charge of that sort of money.

This^

I realised some years ago it's how money is managed. Not necessarily how much you have. Albeit, very many people are earning National Minimum Wage or below average salaries.

I also get it that there's sometimes some luck involved i.e. right place at the right time regardless of what that is/was and on more than one occasion. Also, I understand that capitalising on opportunities can take work and courage.

My husband doesn't believe in luck. He's of the, 'the harder I work, the luckier I get' school of thought.

We paid cash for our house last year. (Neither of us had any work or income for five months prior to this. We paid the rent and other bills from savings from when we were working. Easy life for five months ? Nope, we watched every penny and were determined not to waste our house purchase money on rent i.e. assisting someone else buy their house.)

By the time we moved in to our new house, we were both working. Me in short term temp work. My husband in longer term contract type work.

Not having to pay rent or mortgage makes me feel well off. However, I'm still looking for a new job. I've got an MS Teams interview next week. I've applied for other jobs too. I can't let go of the working habit. Frankly, I'm bored. Lots to do at home, plus exercise and practicing healthy habits but that's become it's own treadmill. I can't work up the motivation to do voluntary work like I've done in the past.

My husband and I share one car, we always have. We purchased an 8 year old car a few months ago to replace the 15 year old car that we part exchanged on.

My husband and I have inherited money from the death of our surviving parent/s in the last couple of years. Not lottery winning proportions but thank you very much never the less.

So, that's the house paid for and savings taken care of.

Our spending habits haven't changed. We've one UK holiday for the last 5 years. Bought a second hand car and I'm really pleased when I buy something in the sale.

My husband would dearly love a permanent job as his pension is frozen as at when he left Local Authority employment ten years ago. Me too.

Neither of us has a life insurance policy as that's been taken care of by work, up to now. (Yes ok, so buy one - not difficult.)

My point is, we haven't suddenly turned into, 'champagne Charlies.'

We chose to go an live overseas for a few years and have been back in Britain for a few years. I put time over money.

JaninaDuszejko · 19/10/2021 12:56

[quote YerAWizardHarry]@JaninaDuszejko I earn £42,000 and take home MUCH less than £4-5K a month- closer to £2.5K than £3K actually[/quote]
I was talking about gross salary, net salary is too variable. Someone could be on £90k and receiving childcare vouchers, and paying loads into their pension and so paying the same tax, and taking home the same amount as someone on much less but would be much richer.

HouseCart · 19/10/2021 21:12

[quote FirewomanSam]@HouseCart how do you mean? Do you mean you worry about losing your job and that financial security? Or that in order to earn that kind of money, you have to be in a job where you constantly worry?

I am a big believer in the ‘life swap’ idea, i.e. that if you feel jealous of something someone else has, you can’t just imagine having that thing, you have to imagine completely swapping lives with them. It’s saved me from feeling jealous of friends who are richer than me because while I might fancy their bigger house or their holidays, I definitely wouldn’t want their job or a husband like theirs. Another friend lives in a gorgeous house which she bought with her inheritance from her father passing away young. I can’t be jealous because it goes without saying I’d rather have my dad than her house.

I guess it goes both ways and I probably have friends who envy my job (which is very niche, interesting and ‘cool’ but low paid) but would rather have their financial security than my fun job![/quote]
I worry about losing it all, the job, the financial security. I hated, absolutely hated, being poor growing up. I am extremely tight except when it comes to my kids.

But yes also to high earning jobs/business coming with added stress

You can take the girl out of poor but you can't take the poor out of her

userchange987 · 19/10/2021 21:30

@JaninaDuszejko I'm assuming the op and most replies were talking net, the actual money in their hands. I certainly was.

Royalbloo · 19/10/2021 21:32

I was horrendously skint until very, very recently. Now earning approx £7k per month. Finding it very hard to get used to - is there such a thing as "earning guilt"? If so, that's what I've got.

Royalbloo · 19/10/2021 21:33

I don't expect anyone to feel bad for me but I'm struggling with it more than I ever thought was possible...

Sunset999 · 19/10/2021 21:36

Must be amazing not to have to budget and have the shopping list with maximum prices on each item.....i can dream!

Avarua · 19/10/2021 22:43

This sounds twattish but it stood out to me in the responses that there is little understanding of what being actually rich is like. You're not rich if you're still thinking in terms of income per month instead of net wealth. Or indeed if you are relying on a job for most of your income. Income for day to day needs will be taken care of by returns generated from invested wealth for the rich. Rich people don't "work" that much or only when they want to (they see investments as fun).

BlueOnYellow · 19/10/2021 23:04

@Avarua

This sounds twattish but it stood out to me in the responses that there is little understanding of what being actually rich is like. You're not rich if you're still thinking in terms of income per month instead of net wealth. Or indeed if you are relying on a job for most of your income. Income for day to day needs will be taken care of by returns generated from invested wealth for the rich. Rich people don't "work" that much or only when they want to (they see investments as fun).

But the question wasn’t about being rich, it was about people who don’t worry about money because they have a level of income that gives them a comfortable lifestyle.

laurenGame · 20/10/2021 01:22

I agree with @Avarua I was just thinking of this earlier.

I have two parameters for being truly rich/not worrying about money:

Flying business class (always) for long haul flights. I was looking at paying for one recently but at £5 I just couldn't justify it. Flying business on long flights all the time is the definition of 'I'm comfortable financially'.

Working for enjoyment, not money. As in: telling your boss you do not wish to go back to working from the office, as it doesn't suit you. You can raise this as you don't need to work, you do it as you enjoy it.

laurenGame · 20/10/2021 01:22

*£5k

laurenGame · 20/10/2021 01:23

@Royalbloo

I was horrendously skint until very, very recently. Now earning approx £7k per month. Finding it very hard to get used to - is there such a thing as "earning guilt"? If so, that's what I've got.

Well done, how did you manage that? I'm on similar and it took me 5 years to get here - and I thought that was fast

laurenGame · 20/10/2021 01:25

@Royalbloo earning gilt....? As long as your bills are paid and you have put a decent amount into savings, please buy nice things for yourself. You have earned them, it will feel nice, and life is there to be enjoyed.

laurenGame · 20/10/2021 01:26

*guilt haha

XpressoMartini · 20/10/2021 06:11

If you really want to know……
I know vaguely what’s my gross pay but have no idea what’s the net as I never ever check my bank statements and I don’t do my taxes. I just know it’s insanely high and my husband earns even more (a multiple).
I work because I enjoy it, not because I need it.
I don’t count/check prices when buying groceries, clothes, at the restaurant…

Yet we’re not “flashy” (we’re actually the opposite) and spend little in relation to our earnings: no designer clothes, no sports cars, no business class when with the kids (we don’t want them to know we have money and feel entitled)…

As a result we have a lot in savings and investments (including many properties) and virtually no debt.

MyOtherProfile · 20/10/2021 08:12

@XpressoMartini interested to know what virtually no debt means, and why you would have any debt on such a high income.

userchange987 · 20/10/2021 08:13

@MyOtherProfile mortgage?

MyOtherProfile · 20/10/2021 08:24

@userchange987 I'm guessing so but if they have such a massive income it would make sense to have paid that off and avoid interest.

Sunset999 · 20/10/2021 08:40

@XpressoMartini

If you really want to know…… I know vaguely what’s my gross pay but have no idea what’s the net as I never ever check my bank statements

and I don’t do my taxes. I just know it’s insanely high and my husband earns even more (a multiple). I work because I enjoy it, not because I need it. I don’t count/check prices when buying groceries, clothes, at the restaurant…

Yet we’re not “flashy” (we’re actually the opposite) and spend little in relation to our earnings: no designer clothes, no sports cars, no business class when with the kids (we don’t want them to know we have money and feel entitled)…

As a result we have a lot in savings and investments (including many properties) and virtually no debt.

And you must enjoy lots of Xpresso Martinins :)

Your life sounds fab, ok I'm envious !!

Meruem · 20/10/2021 08:42

Money has bought me happiness. No more financial worries, yes that makes me happy. Being able to go on nice holidays and buy the things I want, yes very happy. Can you trade money for a box of happiness. No. But it can buy you things and experiences that make you happy. It can take away that fear of the washing machine breaking, knowing you can’t afford to replace it. An absence of worry is happiness. Money can’t buy you happiness is something we tell ourselves to make us feel better when we’re skint.

I’m not mega rich. I don’t earn 4K a month. But I earn a reasonable amount. My DC are adults so don’t cost me anything! My outgoings are fairly low. So that leaves me with a good amount of disposable income. I have been really poor in the past (was a single mum on benefits for a while) and the truth is I am 1000 times happier now.