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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My partner users my towels, flannel etc

238 replies

007Stocko · 14/10/2021 17:41

AIBU to expect to have my own towel, flannel etc? My partner and I have lived together for just over 2 years now and it annoys me that they keep using 'my' towels etc.

I don't mean as in I have my own set, like mine are green ones and yours are the blue ones, but once we start a clean set of towels we should stick to our own set, or am I being too fussy?

OP posts:
Wroxie · 14/10/2021 20:00

@jaundicedoutlook we have a basket about the size of a shoebox with 50-odd flannels in it and they go in the bathroom laundry basket after a brief detour to the radiator to dry out - it's hardly a chore, and as my reward I get a sparkling clean arse. I guess we prioritise different things LOL.

neededafart · 14/10/2021 20:02

Nah I'm a slob. I grab what ever towel I can find. Just used a slight damp one which I'm sure my son used earlier.

Wroxie · 14/10/2021 20:02

@SylvanasWindrunner "English" isn't a race...

SylvanasWindrunner · 14/10/2021 20:03

You're right. Just a bigot then. My apologies!

BestestBrownies · 14/10/2021 20:07

Well this thread is insightful.

I still haven’t fully recovered from the fact that the vast majority on here think their arse is perfectly clean after a quick wipe with dry tissue Envy

PussInBin20 · 14/10/2021 20:11

Definitely separate towels in our house. It confirmed it for me when our DD got athletes foot or conjunctivitis, verucas etc ie things that are really contagious that I didn’t want to catch!

HouseOfFire · 14/10/2021 20:14

You need your own coloured towels, makes life so much easier

AFewSandwichesShortOfAPicnic · 14/10/2021 20:15

@KatesMott

You put his dick inside you but you can’t share a towel?! Confused
OP didn't say her partner was male.

It doesn't really matter though, someone bumping genitals together doesn't mean they have to be ok with wiping their face with a towel that's been between someone's arse cheeks. It's personal preference and just because one family is ok with sharing towels with each other doesn't mean there's anything wrong with people who don't to dry themselves on a used towel.

I've never put my face (or any other body part) in my dhs crack or on his arsehole. Clean or dirty. I don't want to dry my face with a towel that's been there either. He respects that. Other couples are ok with that, some people share with the household but even though My Dd literally came out of my fanny she would be grossed out at the idea of drying her face on a towel that's dried my minge or her dads arse a few hours before.

Anonymous48 · 14/10/2021 20:16

[quote Wroxie]@Anonymous48 do you really not know what a flannel is used for? You put soap or body wash on it and you wash yourself. If you are just using your hands, you're not getting clean- you actually need some sort of texture and friction to remove dead skin cells and and the general buildup of living. If you use some kind of sponge or one of those net ball things, it's festering with bacteria. A flannel is used once (I hope) and then washed.

I notice that lots of English people have a bit of a musty smell sometimes that I put down to not being able to get their clothes completely dry in the winter when they couldn't peg them out but maybe it's just down to not washing correctly.[/quote]
Nice bit of xenophobia there, but actually I'm not English.

And I think your claim that you don't get properly clean if you don't use a washcloth (I assume that's what you mean by flannel) is nonsense!

Tiramiwho · 14/10/2021 20:20

Er..men that I have known ( in the past ) have a habit of using their towel to get deep down into their crevices. Just saying. 🤐

KatesMott · 14/10/2021 20:33

@AFewSandwichesShortOfAPicnic

“OP didn't say her partner was male”
Either way you’re still intimate partners with each other and I’d expect my partner to be clean having washed prior to using a towel. If that’s not the case then there’s far bigger issues at play… rimming someone and sharing a towel feel pretty far apart wether you’re into that or not. Children, or anyone else I wasn’t intimately close with, I wouldn’t expect to share, but then I wouldn’t swap saliva with them either which I assume you do with a partner when you kiss. Each time their own I guess 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m guessing those who are more stringent on the separation of towels keep them on their side of the bed, name tagged and next to their penis beaker ☺️

cushioncovers · 14/10/2021 20:34

Towels I share, flannels no way.

Kb2942 · 14/10/2021 20:35

Dp often uses towels I have used. I usually wash towels every couple uses anyway. I Chuck flannels in wash after every use as I can't stand used flannels hanging around!

jaundicedoutlook · 14/10/2021 20:37

[quote Wroxie]@jaundicedoutlook we have a basket about the size of a shoebox with 50-odd flannels in it and they go in the bathroom laundry basket after a brief detour to the radiator to dry out - it's hardly a chore, and as my reward I get a sparkling clean arse. I guess we prioritise different things LOL.[/quote]
Lordy - you need a flannel to ensure arse cleanliness? The things I never knew! That people wander round all day with dingleberries until they can reach their flannels!

Dojacatpaws · 14/10/2021 20:40

We share, but just use a different dry one

jaundicedoutlook · 14/10/2021 20:40

Whilst I’m about it, is it just me that’s slightly grossed by the idea that Wroxie is (by her own admission) cleaning her dingleberry infested arse crack with a flannel, which is then wrung out and left to dry on a warm radiator?

nocluewhattowritehere · 14/10/2021 20:41

For the people saying they share their towel with their oh or kids or whatever, are you talking about a hand towel or an actual towel to dry your body? I'm really struggling to believe people share a towel to dry their body with another person/other people😭 surely this is a joke??

As for sharing a flannel with others, you guys can't be serious?! A flannel that's used to clean your body including your intimate areas. You'll seriously share that with someone else within your household?
Next thing people are gonna come along saying they share toothbrushes too.

This reminds me of the time early last year where a lot of people were revealing they don't wash their legs when in the shower/bath on Twitter. Didn't think it could get worse than that but clearly it can!

Offmyfence · 14/10/2021 20:41

@Tiramiwho

Er..men that I have known ( in the past ) have a habit of using their towel to get deep down into their crevices. Just saying. 🤐
And women don't?
Wallywobbles · 14/10/2021 20:42

We have his towel colour and my towel colour. Not interchangeable ever.

nocluewhattowritehere · 14/10/2021 20:46

And I think your claim that you don't get properly clean if you don't use a washcloth (I assume that's what you mean by flannel) is nonsense!

So how else does ones body get properly cleaned? By the use of hands only?
@Anonymous48

JesusIsAnyNameFree · 14/10/2021 20:46

@Wallywobbles

We have his towel colour and my towel colour. Not interchangeable ever.
See this would drive me nuts. Different colours. Does it not bother others having mismatched towels?😂
YanTanTetheraPetheraPimp · 14/10/2021 20:47

@Wallywobbles

We have his towel colour and my towel colour. Not interchangeable ever.
This ^^ No way on earth would I share a towel with DH let alone a face cloth. Hand towels are shared but changed every other day.
Tangletester · 14/10/2021 20:47

I wouldn’t like this. We have the same colour towels with different patterns to avoid this!

Getyourownback · 14/10/2021 20:48

You’re perfectly reasonable. Why would you want to dry your face with something he’s flossed his crack with?

sqirrelfriends · 14/10/2021 20:48

I can't believe the responses on here.

I do not want to dry my face with the same towel DH has dried his arse with.