@LolaSmiles
NeverDropYourMooncup
I see, so naturally the only option for men is to find a single, female colleague to share his marital woes with.
The world is shit for men's mental health, so the solution is women should lower their standards and accept that it's entirely reasonable for their husband to bitch about their relationships when chilling 1 on 1 with a single, female colleague?
FWIW plenty of people have said that it would be different if a man and a woman were close friends because sharing is part of close friendships. A colleague is not a close friend and so far nobody's managed to explain why these men seem to regularly find the need to open up to female colleagues/acquaintances who are single/younger/considered datable.
How does anybody make friends if they're not allowed to talk in more depth to anyone?
Amongst other things, I've got a mental health first aid qualification and the people who would talk to me because they were struggling and didn't have the wide support networks assumed to be available to everybody were almost entirely men.
There's been depression, stress, divorce, bereavement, loneliness, caring responsibilities, domestic abuse and coercive control, PTSD and undiagnosed autism amongst the things they have talked about for the first time when I've just been my usual self. I'm sure that some here would say 'oh well, that's different, you're clearly not attractive if they aren't trying to fuck you', but I'm not that hideous.
There's huge stigma in admitting weakness or 'seeing somebody', especially if there's a worry it could be pounced upon at work as well. So they're talking to somebody at work who they get along with. And sometimes it's just being able to say the words to somebody safe, sometimes it's really needing professional advice, which they're encouraged to do. And then we get on with normal working relationships again.
Men aren't all walking penises in search of receptacles. They do have feelings and fears, too. And sometimes that means they will talk to a colleague who they think won't take the piss or laugh at them because they get along normally - sometimes that's a woman.
Sometimes a man is looking for more than a chat in the pub or in an office. But that doesn't mean that a) they should feel unable to speak to a woman when she is somebody they feel comfortable talking to and b) that women should be reduced to their sexual value by other men and other women because a man feels comfortable talking to them. It's the logic that is used by coercive and controlling men to make sure their spouses never look at a man, much less speak to them 'because it's obvious he's only doing that because he wants to fuck you'.
If you don't give a flying fuck about anybody else (and you don't have to, it's not obligatory), fine. If you are sure that no man would ever be able to speak to you without wanting to jump your bones and your husband is so untrustworthy that speaking to a female that isn't you means he's inherently looking for a quick bunk up, that's your dysfunctional relationship.
But I think saying it's impossible to be anything other than looking for sex is unfair to both men and women.