To think it's not right to charge adult children rent to live at home

[Hdhshxhs]

I have a few friends who charge their adult DC rent to live at home.

I personally find this very strange, no matter their age my children will always be my children and welcome in my home without any expectation of money.

I think aswell with it being so hard for young people to get on the housing ladder these days one of the only ways they can is to live at home rent free so they can save for a deposit.

AIBU?

So when do you expect them to stand on their own 2 feet? How do you expect them to manage money and pay bills? Paying rent to live at home whilst earning money is the first step in learning these skills.

You really have no clue how difficult life is for some people do you OP.

Just because you live with your parents, if you are working you should make a contribution unless your parents are well enough off not to need it. I paid a very nominal rent and for certain things. It was fair. I lived there and used energy, phone, food, etc. Taught me that life isn’t a free ride.

My parents made clear that if we lived at home once we left school, unless we were at university, then we would pay 10% of our wages for board money. In reality they never asked for more than £50 a week no matter what, but I think it was a good policy as me and my siblings all lived at home at various points and contributed, there was no animosity from any of us as we didn’t expect a free ride from our parents (even had they been able to afford it) and in reality we saved loads by living at home even though we paid rent.

People have cb and tax credits and help until 18/19 then this goes and if they go to work they pay their way
Plus you choose not to charge yours others have to or choose to and thats fine , their house , their child , their rules
You do not know others finances

@CatsArePeople how is it grabby ? So as a poster said she will loose £750 in benefits, maintenance etc , so what does she feed the kids , pay bills with
You have no ideas of others finances
We will charge my son, he just left college through choice and has to get a job and pay rent that is what the choice was
Luckily at the monent we are not desperate for his small rent contributuon so will save it without him knowing , but if one of us was made redundant again I would have no qualms using it to put some food on the table or electric in the meter

I won’t charge my children rent either. I don’t know why people have children if they can’t afford them

@Nosleepingclub thats a little different than charging for help towards bills
25 years ago I paid £100 a month , I plan to charge my son £25-50 a week depending in his job but hope to save it but if times become tough I would use foe bills/ food
Whatever he pays won't actually cover all his costs and certainly we won't make anything from it

My OC paid rent as soon as he got FT employment. I did his washing, looked after his car (not fuel), fed him and paid for super fast internet for his gaming. If he'd got all this for free he'd have stayed here forever! Seriously, it's just good practice to teach them responsibility and how the world works.

@PegorySpeck maybe they can afford children but not adults and what a pathetic post , do people not loose jobs , maybe become widowed etc
Think

@PegorySpeck

I won’t charge my children rent either. I don’t know why people have children if they can’t afford them

Do you not think situations can change? Fucking idiotic.

Personally I think it's not right to NOT charge adult dc who live at home. Adults need to pay their way in the world and pretending otherwise doesn't do them any favours. Tbh I suspect its how cocklodgers are created.

I think it depends on the circumstances.
When my adult DS left university and came home, he did not have a job for a while, so I certainly did not charge him any rent out of his job seekers allowance. However, apart from his board and lodging, I did not give him extra.
When he started earning, I charged him a nominal rent (as a percentage of his earnings), as a contribution towards his costs at home. It was certainly not anywhere near what the going rate would be, if he had left home, and renting in a shared house, etc.
I am not saying that this is what other people should do. It felt right for us at the time, and my DS felt happy about it as well.

You're really not doing them any favours, you should be preparing your kids for the real world and that involves paying your way.

@PegorySpeck, these are adults not children.

My mum charged me rent when I was living there, then gave it me all back when I moved out. Which I think is great. Taught me about budgeting and showed I was an adult, but was a lovely saving plan when I left, so showed me how putting a little away can really add up. I'll do the same with mine.

[quote vodkaredbullgirl]@PegorySpeck, these are adults not children.[/quote]
Oh ok I thought your children were still your children regardless of what age they are

It's really interesting how we never have threads saying I think my parents should support me no matter what, even if I'm earning good money and they've lost benefits now that I'm working.

@EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall

Well if my 18 year old didn't pay the rent we'd all be homeless. I'm certainly not making anything from him and have lost far more than just HB

Even if i could afford not to charge him there's no way would he not want to pay anything if I was only left with £100 after all bills

This exactly. If your adult children are working, and know that you are left with so little after paying for everything, then you're bringing them up to be extremely selfish, entitled individuals. I would never have done that to my mum.

@PegorySpeck theyll still be your children when they move out, no? Will you be paying their rent for them then, too?

@HollowTalk

It's really interesting how we never have threads saying I think my parents should support me no matter what, even if I'm earning good money and they've lost benefits now that I'm working.

But we have a lot from their outraged Dsibs/DsibIL's.... ;)

@CatsArePeople

I agree with OP. Maybe if your child is a Premier League footballer - then fair enough. But if they are teenagers on their first part-time job - that's grabby and immoral.

OP was not talking about a teenager doing a part-time job. She was talking about an adult. I haven't seen anyone suggesting that you should ask a 15 year old to pay you from their paper round money. The conversation is about adult children who are earning a FT (or nearly) wage. Completely different.

@Hdhshxhs

Not sure how it's a stealth boast. It doesn't make sense to me that youd have children but the second they turn 18 you can't afford to have them around anymore

Because you've lost tax credits, partner died, you're retired and have less income, you have a job that pays you less, you always struggled financially and now your adult children are in a position to help, because you have health problems...it's not hard to think of reasons why this would be the case. You are assuming everyone is financially comfortable. I think there's a big difference between charging your just turned 18 year old rent and your financially comfortable 30 year old who's still living at home.

@Mylittlepotofjoy

I must be a push over ! We have 5 children who have all come home to live after uni and never charged any of them they have also come home with partners in tow and same thing applies !!! I just can’t do it but I do occasional ask for help with animals ect they are family and this is their home so no I couldn’t charge them

Are they working?

I wouldn't- unless it was to put aside to help them buy.