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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to let DS play on his switch in church?

241 replies

FatCatThinCat · 07/10/2021 15:34

I haven't done this, I'm trying to gauge how bad it would be. I haven't been to church in years and really want to start going again but there's not a chance with my DS as he's autistic and wouldn't sit still or quiet for more than 2 minutes. But if I let him have his switch with headphones he'll sit still and quiet for hours. But it's church so it feels really disrepectful. What do you think?

YANBU - he has a disability and he needs it get through the hour

YABU - are you having a laugh, of course you can't let him do this

OP posts:
HeyFloof · 09/10/2021 22:29

[quote Janaih]@HeyFloof you must have missed where I said "I understand that needs must". Easily done, I've only said it on every single post.[/quote]
No, I didn't miss it. The whole judgement and opinion preceding that statement was all there too.

Janaih · 09/10/2021 22:34

OP asked for opinions, I gave mine.

HeyFloof · 09/10/2021 23:18

@Janaih

OP asked for opinions, I gave mine.
And I said your opinions don't make you sound like a very tolerant Christian. Which they don't.

And that's aside from the "drugging them" comment, which is just plain weird.

RAFHercules · 09/10/2021 23:55

Janaih I want to say "you really are an arse aren't you", but I will be kind and ask you to go and reflect on how hard parenting a child with Autism can be.
OP, if anyone complains about your child doing whatever he needs to do, to make Church accessible for him, then they really need to listen harder to the gospels.

PieMistee · 10/10/2021 01:33

@jahaih
Then a
I presume you know that you have zero skills in dealing with anyone that isn't neurotypical

Twatterati · 10/10/2021 02:17

This would be fine in my church, and others that I've been to as well.

I really hope you decide to definitely go, enjoy it and start to get to know everyone - it's a great way to become part of the community, especially when you've just moved there.

Janaih · 10/10/2021 07:29

And yet here you all are judging me. Funny.

SequinnedShawl · 10/10/2021 07:36

@Janaih

And yet here you all are judging me. Funny.
That's what churchgoers do. Act like total cunts then say "I go to church so I'm a good person" Hypocrites.

Because they spend an hour a week in a church they believe they're better than non-church goers.

HeyFloof · 10/10/2021 07:43

@Janaih

And yet here you all are judging me. Funny.
Im more shocked than judgemental to be honest. But you do you, I've met plenty of intolerant Christians, and I don't expect that to change Grin
Sexnotgender · 10/10/2021 07:47

@GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing

Absolutely not at our church. No way. But no idea what churches in Sweden would be like.
Why not?

I’m married to a minister and I can pretty confidently say he wouldn’t give 2 hoots if a child was sitting quietly playing. If it allows the mum to worship and doesn’t impact anyone else what is the objection?

twobarnsmammisonthebus · 10/10/2021 07:54

Svenska Kyrkan has in the last year or so done lots to actively ensure that the church is accessible for people with diagnoses such as autism. I would have thought that you would be absolutely fine to have your son come with you and have his switch with his headphones. Do you read Swedish? if so I’ll ping you a couple of links! Kram!

Danzig · 10/10/2021 12:20

@Janaih

Well she could just drug him then, the effect would be the same.
What a fucking ridiculous ablist comment.
Original poster
FatCatThinCat · 10/10/2021 12:26

@twobarnsmammisonthebus

Svenska Kyrkan has in the last year or so done lots to actively ensure that the church is accessible for people with diagnoses such as autism. I would have thought that you would be absolutely fine to have your son come with you and have his switch with his headphones. Do you read Swedish? if so I’ll ping you a couple of links! Kram!
Yes I can read Swedish. Just about.
OP posts:
twobarnsmammisonthebus · 10/10/2021 12:44

www.svenskakyrkan.se/pressmeddelande/svenska-kyrkan-lanserar-utbildningen-delaktighet-och-tillganglighet?publisherId=1344892&releaseId=3285626&channels=3116725,3240407&webid=502669

www.svenskakyrkan.se/lundsstift/kyrka-funktionshinder

Here’s a few that might be of interest - outlining the church’s attitude and ethos, to make it easier to be accessible to all kinds of needs.

3WildOnes · 10/10/2021 13:28

@Janaih your reply was incredibly offensive.

Drinkingallthewine · 15/10/2021 12:26

@PurpleDaisies

I think a lot of the votes/comments are from people who are only at church for weddings and don’t know how a regular service runs.
Exactly. Weddings are very different - usually a lot of the 'rules' about devices comes from the couple themselves - either they don't want to be put on social media, or they don't want dickheads with shitty iphones getting in front of the expensive photographer at key moments. Or because they are recording the ceremony on video and don't want to hear a load of text pings and ringtones on their video.

Very little is church or priest rules.

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