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Original poster

To be annoyed my mum says I’m a snob for this

330 replies

BrendaBubbles · 05/10/2021 19:28

It’s relevant to note that I am from a working class background and last year I moved into a flat in an actually “naice” area of the northern town I grew up in. The number of the flat has “A” after it because it was originally the upstairs of a single Edwardian townhouse and the ground floor has the number only.. for example I have 69A and downstairs they have 69.

I thought having the A just looked a bit rubbish and a friend suggested that I could instead give the flat a name and register it with the post office and so on to use it officially. So I went through this rigmarole and my flat is now called something along the lines of Brenda Tower then the road name etc (not exactly that name due to privacy!)

I thought it was quite a fun thing to do but when I told my DM she went berserk and said she was disappointed because she hadn’t brought me up to be so snobby about something like an address and that moving to this part of town has made me into a worse person. I thought she was joking at first but she is really holding me in contempt for it and makes annoying references to how “posh” and “too good” I am at family gatherings and things. Other than having a nice flat in a nice area and giving it my own name, Am I actually being unreasonable?? Lots of people with cottages and things have house names so why can’t my flat?

OP posts:
saltinesandcoffeecups · 05/10/2021 23:06

@elfycat

I live in a 'A' house. It's a whole detached property, but was built in the 1930s on a piece of land once owned by the Gas Board and all the numbers were used up, so it got an 'a'.

It also has a 'name' but we never use it. It's on the council tax bill and assorted other bits. It's perfectly fine to have both and use whichever is handier at the time or indeed have an address like:

Elfycat
Generic house name
99a Road name
Town
County
Postcode.

I always find American addresses amazing. I mean is there really 1170 houses on Road name avenue? Really? I mean how long is that road?

The American addresses have some logic…

In a lot of cities and metro areas the streets are in a grid pattern.

So in my area in the big city they have 1st street, with the next block 2nd , and the next 3rd, and so on even crossing city lines. So that 1170 Main St would be on Main St with the cross street being 11th. The 70 is the house designation. It’s also is referred to the 1100 block in some circles like emergency services.

The second set of digits defy logic, as 1170 may be next door to 1172 or 1181. Usually odd on one side and even on the other. For example my digits are 4707 and my NDN is 4713.

Now the really fun addresses are the ones they’ve chosen a spot designated as a starting point and the address of another location is based off of that starting point so the address could b N16W23390 sot location is North 16 blocks and West 233 blocks from that starting point with 90 be the house designation. 😵‍💫 luckily for the rest of the world this seems to be a particular quirk of my local area.

longwayoff · 05/10/2021 23:06

Although nothing tops the renaming of another local house, one with an ancient tree in the garden and therefore named and known as Oak House for donkeys years until Brian and Noreen bought it and blessed it with a new name. Brinora. Yes, really. Eventually had to put a notice in the window This House Is Now Called Brinora. House names. A minefield.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 05/10/2021 23:08

All that to say I’d love to be able to name my house officially…

Cherrysoup · 05/10/2021 23:10

Major.y pretentious. A neighbour gave her house a French name referencing its position in the street which just made me lol, particularly as her French accent was appalling (yes, I’m a language snob, what can I say, I’m bilingual)

neveradullmoment99 · 05/10/2021 23:20

@BrendaBubbles

It’s relevant to note that I am from a working class background and last year I moved into a flat in an actually “naice” area of the northern town I grew up in. The number of the flat has “A” after it because it was originally the upstairs of a single Edwardian townhouse and the ground floor has the number only.. for example I have 69A and downstairs they have 69.

I thought having the A just looked a bit rubbish and a friend suggested that I could instead give the flat a name and register it with the post office and so on to use it officially. So I went through this rigmarole and my flat is now called something along the lines of Brenda Tower then the road name etc (not exactly that name due to privacy!)

I thought it was quite a fun thing to do but when I told my DM she went berserk and said she was disappointed because she hadn’t brought me up to be so snobby about something like an address and that moving to this part of town has made me into a worse person. I thought she was joking at first but she is really holding me in contempt for it and makes annoying references to how “posh” and “too good” I am at family gatherings and things. Other than having a nice flat in a nice area and giving it my own name, Am I actually being unreasonable?? Lots of people with cottages and things have house names so why can’t my flat?

Its nice. Not 'naice' grrrrrrrrrrr....
Iamthewombat · 05/10/2021 23:21

@Cherrysoup

Major.y pretentious. A neighbour gave her house a French name referencing its position in the street which just made me lol, particularly as her French accent was appalling (yes, I’m a language snob, what can I say, I’m bilingual)
Please tell me that the house is called ‘Au coin de la rue’.
CJsGoldfish · 05/10/2021 23:42

Your mum obviously overreacted but she's most likely embarrassed FOR you. I am.

Iamthewombat · 05/10/2021 23:48

Oh give the OP a break. She’s allowed to give her flat a name if it amuses her to do so.

SudokuWillNotSaveYou · 05/10/2021 23:53

[quote JasonMomoasgirlfriend]@SudokuWillNotSaveYou no I don't think it is her name is it? She said "my own name" meaning once she had made up I think?[/quote]
@JasonMomoasgirlfriend No, it’s definitely “her” name, as she has now joked about making her DM feel better by changing it to DM’s name instead. It might be a last name instead of a first name, but it’s her actual name, hence using “Brenda Towers” for the example as her screen name is brendabubbles. Now: do you think it’s naff to file official paperwork and name a RENTED flat after yourself? C’mon… be honest…

I’m still shocked the landlord thought this was fine. Dunno if OP’s DM is right but I still think a group of psychologists who were tipsy at a dinner party would have a field day hearing this story:
“OP grows up working class, and as an adult can afford to rent (but not own) flat in neighborhood she considers a huge step up (calls it “naice”) from where she grew up. But the Edwardian that contains her flat is split in two, and instead of being 69, she is relegated to being… 69A. Instead of accepting this, she files official paperwork to permanently name the rented flat after herself forever - no longer 69A Road, but OP Towers. So, does her mother have a point about “distancing” herself from working class roots, and have you EVER heard of someone with a rented flat doing this ever before over a # vs. #A issue?”

choosername1234 · 05/10/2021 23:55

If you named it after yourself, would it affect the sale value?

ThinWomansBrain · 06/10/2021 00:07

Not snobbish - bit batshit maybe.

Randomneim · 06/10/2021 01:19

It could be snobby in some circumstances but by the sounds of it, you just enjoy your flat and want to give it a name as part of celebrating your home and giving it character. People do all sorts of sweet personal shit to their houses and I'm here for it. If people can name their rose covered cottages, why not name your flat if it gives you happiness! That said, you may struggle to get deliveries! Could you use, like, both? would that be weird? This is a separate issue to your Mum's reaction, which is kind of logical but also a bit outsize and rather mean I think.

Randomneim · 06/10/2021 01:23

Also people need to let up with the snobbery against renters. Rent it, own it, name it if you want!

Also the Brinora story is heaven.

grapewine · 06/10/2021 01:27

My UK landlord wouldn't even let me hang things on the walls or paint. I'm surprised you were allowed to do this in a rental.

batmanladybird · 06/10/2021 02:08

How much did it cost?
We live rurally and I hate the name of our house (we don't have a number) but we looked into changing it with the post office and it was hundreds

ReeseWitherfork · 06/10/2021 02:48

@saltinesandcoffeecups interesting that blocks are occasionally referred to by a number. I read something online (so god knows if it's even true!) that addresses in Japanese cities works the opposite of the states. So where Americans name the streets, the Japanese name the blocks. You wouldn't like at 1170 something road, you'd live at House 1, block 1100. Find it fascinating.

ReeseWitherfork · 06/10/2021 02:52

Has OP actually confirmed the house is rented? She may mean 'management company' when she says 'landlord'?

TrotOnCharlie · 06/10/2021 02:54

It's brilliant and funny and your signage works delightfully. You are secure in your world. Your mum however.... My mum is deeply insecure and 'tests' other people to establish how she should really feel about anything different. Depending how others react she either embraces it or keeps banging on.
We used an rare but known and standard spellable name for DD. She tested that for a year with others ' don't know what Charlie was thinking, how is the baby going to live up to that' it took a lot of random positive comments & usage in a BBC loved drama for her to live with it.
My mum's lack of humour plus her insecurity have driven us apart.

BitterTits · 06/10/2021 06:00

It's just a bit of fun, fucking get over yourselves.

KaycePollard · 06/10/2021 06:06

I thought having the A just looked a bit rubbish and a friend suggested that I could instead give the flat a name and register it with the post office and so on to use it officially.

This is the snobbish thing to do. And weird.

BarbaraofSeville · 06/10/2021 06:46

You're both mad. You for thinking there's something wrong with 69A and going to the effort of changing it to Brenda Towers and her for making such a fuss at you for doing so.

But I do think you could come to regret doing this. Even if your flat is clearly signed, it doesn't say where on your road it is, so you're always going to have to explain that you're near number 70 and not near number 2 or 172, especially if the postcode applies to the whole road. It could delay ambulances, and annoy delivery drivers who are always on the clock due to having to deliver a lot of parcels to make any money.

TidyDancer · 06/10/2021 07:39

I just can't understand why anyone would do this. House names when there is already a number make me cringe.

In my job, I work with large address databases and if someone calls me and gives their house name when looking for their details, I will often ask if there's an associated number. They will frequently deny it until I say 'oh, that's coming up as no.45, is that not correct?' and they will invariably say 'oh well, I suppose it is, but we don't use it'. I'm embarrassed for these people.

kinzarose · 06/10/2021 07:53

I don't think there's any issue with naming a house, a flat is a bit odd but whatever. The name has to be appropriate though otherwise it looks like a piss take. Putting 'Towers' as the name on any building without an actual tower is very Hyacinth.

WhoWants2Know · 06/10/2021 08:35

I don't know. I think all of the houses where I live have both names and numbers. Post from the council is always addressed to the name of the house and most other stuff is sent to the number.

longwayoff · 06/10/2021 08:37

I once knew some people named Dobbin who bought a house named The Paddocks. Which still makes me smile.