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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed my mum says I’m a snob for this

330 replies

BrendaBubbles · 05/10/2021 19:28

It’s relevant to note that I am from a working class background and last year I moved into a flat in an actually “naice” area of the northern town I grew up in. The number of the flat has “A” after it because it was originally the upstairs of a single Edwardian townhouse and the ground floor has the number only.. for example I have 69A and downstairs they have 69.

I thought having the A just looked a bit rubbish and a friend suggested that I could instead give the flat a name and register it with the post office and so on to use it officially. So I went through this rigmarole and my flat is now called something along the lines of Brenda Tower then the road name etc (not exactly that name due to privacy!)

I thought it was quite a fun thing to do but when I told my DM she went berserk and said she was disappointed because she hadn’t brought me up to be so snobby about something like an address and that moving to this part of town has made me into a worse person. I thought she was joking at first but she is really holding me in contempt for it and makes annoying references to how “posh” and “too good” I am at family gatherings and things. Other than having a nice flat in a nice area and giving it my own name, Am I actually being unreasonable?? Lots of people with cottages and things have house names so why can’t my flat?

OP posts:
Namebunny · 05/10/2021 21:57

Omg!, I am totally shocked by some of the comments you are getting op! think it’s brilliant to name your flat! Especially after yourself. what an ironically funny and quirky and totally cool thing to do. Absolutely brilliant!I remember when innocent smoothies started out and they called their flat in a block, innocent towers, I thought that was cool too.
I think we need people with a bit of fun in them atm! Go you!

thepeopleversuswork · 05/10/2021 21:58

I think you and your mum are both a bit bonkers.

She's massively over-reacted, there's nothing snobbish about it.

But a) I can't for the life of me see why there's anything declasse or rubbish about having A after your flat number and b) it's actually much tackier and more nouveau to give it a name than leave it with a number.

The whole thing seems a complete flap about nothing and you both need to calm down a bit I think.

WhatAShilohPitt · 05/10/2021 21:58

Unless your flat is called Lofty Heights or The Mansions, which it isn’t, I don’t see much of a problem. However, it’s very unusual to name flats - I’ve never known it happen before. I think a number and then a letter to show the dinged house is now divided is far clearer. House names were used more often for sprawling mansions that were too far from other houses to need numbers and were often well known to people already. In busy cities and towns, you run the risk of your flat bring hard to find. I think her idea about snobbery comes from her thinking naming the flat is about making it seem grand, when though it wasn’t your intention. I don’t understand why you though ‘A’ was rubbish, though? What’s rubbish about marking out two flats?

WhatAShilohPitt · 05/10/2021 21:59

I have no idea where dinged came from!

fashionSOS · 05/10/2021 21:59

@whynotwhatknot

yes i get that but im sure future tenants wont wont it
The landlord can explain how Brenda is a person of historical significance and they are very lucky to live there.

Perhaps a blue plaque to add colour to the marketing spin?

WhatAShilohPitt · 05/10/2021 22:00

*being, not bring ffs

eekbumbler · 05/10/2021 22:00

@BrendaBubbles

do you have problems with deliveries or do you just write above number 70 or whatever

I had a sign made up with the name as I’m the only one up the stairs. It’s not a block.

Oh, you really did put 'Towers'

That is actually quite hilarious - in a I would laugh at it walking past assuming done in jest, but it isn't.

DunBumblin'

night!

TheYearOfSmallThings · 05/10/2021 22:00

Notions.

me4real · 05/10/2021 22:01

OP also said that she named it “Brenda Towers” but not actually that name for privacy reasons. The picture shows that it IS actually called [something] Towers, so putting it all together and given that Brenda is her username I think it’s a pretty safe assumption!

@Daisydoesnt My username's me4real but shhhh, don't tell anyone but that's not my real name. :)

JasonMomoasgirlfriend · 05/10/2021 22:02

@Milliways

Our (long) road only has numbers at the bottom, the newer houses. At our end they are all 1930s named houses. A number would be a lot easier. What 3 Words is useful when giving directions!
This is so weird but my childhood home was called Milliways.

My dad named it :)

EarringsandLipstick · 05/10/2021 22:03

it's your flat,

It's not tho, she rents. I'm amazed you can do this.

But the calling it [surname] Towers... 😂 it seems unbelievable. Is OP taking the mick I wonder?

EarringsandLipstick · 05/10/2021 22:03

Perhaps a blue plaque to add colour to the marketing spin?

😂😂😂😂

eekbumbler · 05/10/2021 22:05

@cormorantes

All I can think of is Casa bevron
You legend.
JasonMomoasgirlfriend · 05/10/2021 22:05

@Milliways I mean it's not going to be that weird because I imagine you are a hitchhikers fan like my dad. But it is weird that you posted on a thread about house names and that was mine :)

EarringsandLipstick · 05/10/2021 22:05

My username's me4real but shhhh, don't tell anyone but that's not my real name

I assume this is tongue in cheek? But if not - the point was actually that the 'Brenda' was substituted with her actual name followed by 'Towers' as per the image.

Not that it was her actual UN!

SnoopyLights · 05/10/2021 22:06

I feel like there has to be more to your mum's problem than a sign on your flat wall.

Families can be a bit weird if one person does something the rest of them wouldn't do.

A few years back I went back to college as a mature student and although my mum was originally supportive, as soon as my new qualification got me a better job my mum called me selfish and said I make everything all about me. She said I think I'm better than everyone, and I wouldn't be able to cope with my job.

She was awful for months about my job, really nasty to me, to the point that I felt I couldn't invite her to my graduation because she resented me going to college in the first place, felt it was selfish, and clearly she wasn't proud of me for doing it. Our relationship still hasn't really recovered from it.

I think now it's because my job can put me in some unsafe situations and she's worried about me, but I'd rather she said that than behave the way she did.

I wonder if your mum is really focusing on this because she's resenting something else about your situation?

Hugoslavia · 05/10/2021 22:06

Christ, you'll be buying mayonnaise next instead of salad cream. It's a slippery slope OP!

Original poster
BrendaBubbles · 05/10/2021 22:08

I always find American addresses amazing. I mean is there really 1170 houses on Road name avenue?

I can actually answer this one as many moons ago I had a boyfriend brought up in the US. Often they have the numbers go up in 100s by block, so you might have 1201 through 1235 and then it jumps to 1300 after a major crossing road. So big gaps in the numbers!

OP posts:
WhenISnappedAndFarted · 05/10/2021 22:10

@Hugoslavia what if you buy both?

SnoopyLights · 05/10/2021 22:13

Also, I used to work for an estate agency, people named flats quite often.

My favourite was "Upstairs on the left' for a block of four flats, two ground floor and two first floor. Upstairs on the left as indeed upstairs on the left. There was also a 'treetops' for an upper floor flat that looked over the top of some trees. My favourite house name was 'The Witches Cottage'. Some people with the surname Bird called their house The Bird House.

If I saw your sign I would just think it was funny and whoever named it had a sense of humour, not that they were trying to be posh.

We haven't named our house but I've always said if we did, I'd choose a name of a country or city so I could tell people I lived in Norway or Rome and mean it. DH won't let me.

tigger1001 · 05/10/2021 22:14

It's not even your house 😱😱

Sorry but while your mum has overreacted, I can see her point. That's just bonkers and am surprised your landlord agreed to it.

Flamingoose · 05/10/2021 22:16

@Namebunny

Omg!, I am totally shocked by some of the comments you are getting op! think it’s brilliant to name your flat! Especially after yourself. what an ironically funny and quirky and totally cool thing to do. Absolutely brilliant!I remember when innocent smoothies started out and they called their flat in a block, innocent towers, I thought that was cool too. I think we need people with a bit of fun in them atm! Go you!
Well said NameBunny. I agree.
ShaneTheThird · 05/10/2021 22:16

That's absolutely hilarious I didn't know you could do that! I want to name my flat now.

me4real · 05/10/2021 22:18

If a landlord let you do that that's pretty cool :)

I'm currently changng my IRL name, some people will think my new name is weird as I'm going to have my middle name as my surname. Like 'Trish Lucy' or whatever. A friend did it but hers was a bit more convincing as a surname.

Everyone should be more creative maybe. I get what people are saying on the landlord/flat front now though @BrendaBubbles - what if you move? I suppose he's thinking it might make you stay there longer.

Blackberrycream · 05/10/2021 22:22

@ShrikeAttack

It's clearly a joke!!

@Blackberrycream, was that the garden sofas one? That was hilarious, people falling over themselves to denounce garden furniture.

That’s the one. This is going the same way. These discussions could happen nowhere else. It’s a bit mad but quite good entertainment…
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