to just be sick of men..

[crochetmonkey74]

Caught by accident two family men known to me discussing how they'd 'got their own pictures' of a dance teacher who was teaching their 6 year old daughters. They were with their wives and children, both supposedly Christian - both in their early 30s so not a generational thing as is often trotted out. It occured to me that when they were dating their wives they would have been MORTIFIED for these new shiny women to hear them being so gross yet now the wives have committed, given them children, become part of the furniture they are supposed to listen to any old shit.
And yes, I know that there are loads of you who will say 'my DH /DP would never dream of doing this' so obviously I am not talking about them- is anyone else just fed up of continually being disappointed even by men you previously liked or trusted?
I know I am being ranty but i'm going with it!

Not all men are like that

Good @AICM.

But do they say anything when they hear other men talking like this? Are they vocal about how awful this is and the impact it has on women?

No?

Then they are part of the problem too.

This is a website for women

Not exclusively.

Urghh.

I think the right thing to do would be to inform the owner of the dance school. Giver her the men's names and be very clear about what they said and indicated - there needs to be no ambiguity. She can decide whether they're allowed in the premises again and can choose whether to issue a general warning to parents (and her teachers).

I hate being coerced by sleazy, sexist social norms into covering for slimeballs like this. Knowing but not telling is choosing to lie by omission on their behalf.

Yet we all know perfectly well that if it became known you had spoken up, you'd become a pariah. Their wives and their wives' friends would hate you.

@Journeyofthedragons

This is a website for women

Not exclusively.

unfortunately

@FluffyWhiteBird

Not all men are like that

This thread is about the ones who are. Maybe it's not the thread for you.

The comment I quoted directly referenced all men.

The word 'all' was actually used.

Not all men are like that is a perfectly valid and fair response when someone says all men are like that.

Sorry, the quote I referenced says, 'the lot of them' which means the same as all.

My comments stand.

No point replying to the NAMALTs. Their misogyny is entrenched. The reason that NAMALT is a crap argument is very obvious and has been explained a thousand times. We know that not all men commit violence against women/sexually harass women/outwardly disrespect women etc. The NAMALTSs aren't telling us anything new there. The point is that A LOT of men do these things, and the ones who don't still benefit from systematic misogyny. We don't hear the good guys speaking out on internet forums about these issues, or doing anything whatsoever to effect change, which makes them part of the problem too.

Sorry @AICM but writing the same brain dead comment again and again isn't going to change anyone's mind or silence any of the women on this thread.

AMALT

Interesting using name.

@IWantT0BreakFree

No point replying to the NAMALTs. Their misogyny is entrenched. The reason that NAMALT is a crap argument is very obvious and has been explained a thousand times. We know that not all men commit violence against women/sexually harass women/outwardly disrespect women etc. The NAMALTSs aren't telling us anything new there. The point is that A LOT of men do these things, and the ones who don't still benefit from systematic misogyny. We don't hear the good guys speaking out on internet forums about these issues, or doing anything whatsoever to effect change, which makes them part of the problem too.

Sorry @AICM but writing the same brain dead comment again and again isn't going to change anyone's mind or silence any of the women on this thread.

It wasn't ment to change your mind.

YADNBU.

Those guts are creeps. Tell the teacher.

Every week there's stories of men killing women. Here in UK, everywhere. That family in Derbyshire. The girl who went missing, whose fiancé then went "missing". Some days it's so fkn depressing.

@AICM seems like a waste of your time then really doesn't it? You don't want to change our minds and you've not managed to shut us up.

@MissLucyEyelesbarrow In other words, you have nothing. Shame. Sorry I'm too old to strain my eyes trying to read whatever childish meme or cartoon you've posted instead of backing up your accusation. Typical.

@Amalt Nice detective. Good detective. Have a biscuit.

[quote IWantT0BreakFree]@AICM seems like a waste of your time then really doesn't it? You don't want to change our minds and you've not managed to shut us up.[/quote]
It's my time.

Surely you're wasting your time responding to me?

Well that may be you but that rarely happens on mn. Most who harp on about all men would die on the hill of 'not all white women' or 'not all white people', even when it's obvious. I suppose it isn't fun when you're part of the group being talked about, eh?

I've not noticed this crossover. There is however a big correlation between all lives matter and namalt types

@OneTC. Another excellent detective. Here's a biscuit.

@SJWsAtItAgain

Seriously most people just realise it's the case without needing to state it. The op even qualified it in the first post in attempt to stave off idiots

How convenient. Surprisingly, "most people" don't seem to realise it when they're the 'offending group' and being talked about generally. You see it all over mn. It just HAS TO BE stated any other time. Idiots as well, are they? Funny that.

Join a different website if you don't like it here, there must be plenty aimed at men, then you won't have to see anything about women being annoyed with men and their general behaviour. Posts like yours are part of the problem, you're trying to invalidate a woman's lived experience and shut down a conversation. This is the problem with men, and yeah, you're almost all like it.

And I’m sure there are lots of men who are just sick of women for X, Y and X.
Men aren’t one homogeneous group so don’t treat them like one.
Oh enough ! It's too many fucking men and I too am sick of it!

@FluffyWhiteBird

So many detectives around. I'll have to pass the biscuit tray to save time. You're all geniuses at your job.

Hint, Einsteins: I'm not a man. I can call out hypocrisy without being one.

@AICM. Well that took a very childish turn, didn't it? I shall leave you to waste your time as you see fit 👍🏼

@OneTC you're dead right. I've observed the same thing among social media contacts. They are one and the same.

There was a poster upthread who said she was anxious about raising a boy. I feel exactly the same. I am worried about my daughter growing up in this climate for obvious reasons, but also wondering how the hell I'm going to turn out a half decent man into society when my son is going to be faced with this tidal wave of porn and rape culture and anti-woman sentiment in his formative years. I can't control that. And they are so, so young when they become exposed to it. There's only a limited amount of control that we have as parents when their friends at school all have smartphones which may not be monitored at all. I worry about this a lot.

I'm not a man

I am. I didn't say you were the namalt population on this board are mostly women, like 99% of the other posters

@shrodingersbiscuit

If someone said they were sick of white people I’d shut the fuck up and listen because racism is a real thing that costs people their lives

But it’s racist and prejudiced to say that because you’re speaking in gross and unfair exaggerations which is wrong. I wouldn’t say I’m sick of Chinese people engaging in … or I’m sick of Jewish people doing … or I’m sick of black people ….

It doesn’t magically become ok just because white people are the majority group in the country in which you’re currently based.

@FluffyWhiteBird honestly I'd just stop replying to that one. She's a very tiresome poster and perhaps if people stop engaging she will go away and leave us to our discussion.

@Clocktopus

I’ve definitely heard mums standing watching their sons play rugby and making comments about the coach. But I do have to say it is somehow worse when it is men saying it about women. I don’t know why….

Probably because the women are less likely to try and take it any further than a "phwoar, look at him", are less likely to sexually assault the coach, are less likely to sexually harass him, and the coach is less likely to be not be taken seriously by his peers because of it.

Indeed. Nor is the coach likely to worry that one day he might find himself alone with one of them and that should they decide to assault him he couldn't fight them off. Or that they might wait for him in the car park in the dark. Or follow him home. Or rape him. Or murder him. Because typically men don't need to worry that female attention, even when unwelcome, might place them in danger.

@OneTC I didnt say you did. Yours is the namalt post. I know.