what’s it like to be married to an upper class (posh) man and how do you get with one?

[PlainPiano]

What’s it like being married to an old money, posh upper class man and how did you get with one?

By posh upper class man I mean:
Multiple generations of his family went to Eton, Harrow, Westminster etc.
Went to Oxford to read PPE, or Cambridge
Has family money going back generations
Works a big City job in finance or in politics etc.

What type of woman do they want, thin, blonde..?

God this is depressing. Gold digging is alive and well

I think gold digging is fine. Let's be honest the families who have had money & titles for generations will have done dodgy stuff to get & hang onto that money.

@AngelicaElizaAndPeggy. I might just love you

Op, I’m sure like everyone else, they likely marry within their social class. While some relationships are an exception to this rule, most stick to the people within their comfort zone.

Own lots of farmland, very traditional and odd. I met a good few at uni and was all taken in at first, especially as the men are often very well mannered and polite. Being vegetarian and reasonably left wing didn't go down well

They're just people, sure it differs. Tell your friend to start making the dough herself if she wants the lifestyle

But the thing is they're not the right type if you are a gold digger as they're very frugal - to the point they'll suffer to save a few pennies. Give me a newly monied man any day of the week! Old money thinks a walk in Norfolk is a holiday, new money knows it's all about a first class flight to Santorini to a 5* hotel and an Hermès bag.

So I’m guessing their type would be people like Prince Harry’s ex Cressida or her siblings Isabella and Gabriella, artsy, slim, pretty, blonde, grew up posh and went to boarding school ..,

On a serious note, it's all to do with the godmothers. Posh people all have multiple godmothers who are usually themselves Uber posh and well connected. I remember arriving at university naively believing that no-body knew each other. On the first evening at dinner, it transpired that all the new posh students already knew each other; sometimes through the captive breeding programme that I mentioned earlier but usually via godmothers. Its a formidable force to be reckoned with and if you don't have one, them I'm afraid it's unlikely you'll find someone super posh who will marry you. I am a massive exception to this - my husband married me despite his godmothers' better judgement 😬- I feel a cold chill to this day!

The first thing you need to do to get one is to throw away your self-respect.

Still interested. Of course you are!

You could try à 10/0 fishing hook, or dig a big hole and cover it with branches and then a layer of leaves. (The latter worked for Tom and Jerry).

Yeah they all have 4 godparents, specially selected for being well heeled and influential and the godparents are 100% expected to do favours for their godchildren down the road with regards to getting jobs etc.

The godparent system was an eye opener for me, let me tell you.

PMSL

Thanks for the laugh @PlainPiano

Have you tried Wetherspoons?

I know a few upper class smart folks through work. Wives are from similar backgrounds, private schools, move in same circles. Usually slim and blonde. Play tennis, act as beaters at the shoot. Generally intelligent, went to top universities but play second fiddle to husband.

My very elite husband

🤣🤣🤣
who the fuck describes their husband like this???

@ElspethFlashman I had never heard of the importance of this godparent system. So they all get given godparents and that’s how they make connections with each from a young age? Then by the time they get to Oxford/Cambridge they all know each other because their parents are each other’s godparents

Old money is also clever, as well as frugal. They’d spot intent like this a mile off. That’s why they’re monied & have retained their riches; because unlike “new money,” who spend spend spend on trash & flash, old money - well, sometimes you wouldn’t always know at first.

@AuntLucy and @AngelicaElizaAndPeggy, they were known (by the boys) as Fuck Trucks in my day Grim.

That’s why they’re monied & have retained their riches; because unlike “new money,” who spend spend spend on trash & flash, old money

I never understand why morally old money is somehow better than new money.

To marry one of these men you must be nose blind their smelly dogs.

If you have to ask on Mumsnet, of all places…

Also, there’s something about the use of the word ‘posh’ that very much signals one’s non-U-ness.

I think your friend might have to go back to the drawing board.

I don’t like the term “posh” because it doesn’t feel right. The term itself feels cheap. But, to answer your question, DH went to Fettes, as did his dad, and he works in the City.

I’m not white, thin or blonde but I am privately educated and did go to finishing school and also work in the City myself.

Honestly, we’re both very normal. We have a variety of friends from different backgrounds and lead a very normal lifestyle. So not sure what you’re trying to get from this thread.

Drop the use of the word “posh” for starters. It’s so…………telling.

Do you basically mean how to meet a rich man?

I worked my backside off, from a working class environment, shit state comp but went to a very good university and an even better I've got post-grad, surrounded by the kind of men you describe. Dated a fair few, realised that money and private education doesn't change the fact that a lot of men are arseholes, and money (especially that which isn't earned) often makes people think they can buy friendship and relationships. Met one once who used to threaten to have his daddy buy people's houses and fire their parents if things weren't going his way.
Want more for yourself OP.

What type of food do they like?