To choose glastonbury over my friends wedding

[Campingcarryon]

My good friend has just told me she is getting married the same weekend as glastonbury festival next year, for which I have tickets and have obviously by then waited 3 years to go, should it go ahead. I really want to go to the festival as getting tickets is incredibly hard and it’s the first time I have had tickets in 10 years. I love it there &
Post pandemic, I really want to just go and have some fun. I have a camper van so do it in a bit more luxury too.

I feel really bad but honestly I would rather go to the festival than the wedding but am I being really unreasonable? I can’t do both either as wedding is in a different part of the country. I don’t want to upset her either obviously 😬

[GoodnightGrandma]

Absolutely go to Glastonbury.
My brother decided to get married when we’d already booked our summer holiday. Tough, I had no problem declining the invitation.

[Notaroadrunner]

Just tell her you've realised the wedding clashes with Glastonbury and as you have tickets for the festival you won't make the wedding. Say it asap so there's no awkwardness later on.

[PollyPepper]

YABU and Glastonbury is shit anyway.

[Ozanj]

Decline the invitation but be tactful

[Campingcarryon]

To be honest, I think I would feel really resentful too knowing I could be at glasto but instead I am at a wedding 😬

[UnderTheMoonlightWeDanced]

One of my friends missed my wedding to go to Ed Sheeran they got the tickets before I sent out the invite I was sad they couldn’t make it but totally understood their pre bought ticket meant they were busy.
Nothing you can do about it!

[olidora63]

Go to Glastonbury…that’s where you really want to go.

[sweetheartyparty]

I would go to Glastonbury. Its an experience too rare to give up. You'll be invited to plenty weddings. It's sad for your friend but if she was desperate for you to go she would have checked beforehand

[UnderTheMoonlightWeDanced]

Honestly the only way around it is if you tell people your wedding date about 2 years in advance but then you need to be certain of your entire guest list that far in advance too. It’s got nothing to do with the friend caring more about a festival than the friendship. Certain events are booked years in advance there is always going to be a clash and that can’t be helped - you just celebrate your friends marriage with a glass of something another day - any friend would understand that.

[Mumsgirls]

If it was that important to her that you are at the wedding, she should have checked before picking a date. She did not so not your fault if you have a prior.

[Claudia84]

Honestly it depends what your friend is like but genuinely I had no issue when people declined our wedding invites. Having arranged a wedding myself I now have absolutely no problem saying no to invites to weddings that I either a) just don’t want to go to or b) have a suitable excuse. There is too much going on in the day and other friends that are there - it won’t stop her having a good time.
Also one fewer meal to buy

[AramintaLee]

Go to Glastonbury. If I booked my wedding on a day when there was already a planned event (presumably the date for Glastonbury 2022 was set before her wedding date was set?) then I wouldn't expect you to change those plans to accommodate me.

My boyfriend and his friends are regularly volunteers at Glasto so I know to avoid that time of the year if we ever get married.

[MaudBaileysGreenTurban]

Glastonbury, without a doubt.

You bought the tickets 3 years ago. It's a shame your friend's wedding clashes, but if was her, there's no way I'd expect you to give up your ticket. I'd be disappointed you couldn't be at my wedding but I'd completely understand.

[dapsnotplimsolls]

Go to Glasto. It's not like a holiday that could be re-arranged or re-booked. Take her and her DH out for a meal or something after the wedding.

[Plumtree391]

You're not unreasonable but do tell sooner rather than later.

Weddings will always be coming up in your life but Glasto is an experience not to be missed. Obviously your friend's wedding is terribly important to her but if she has lots of other friends and rellies there, she'll be fine. Make sure you go to any other other 'events' she may arrange beforehand and see her as soon as possible afterwards.

I hope you enjoy Glastonbury as always. I have never been, lots of other festivals but not that one - wish I had. My son has been a few times and loved it.

[Brieeeeeeeeeeee]

Glastonbury. It’s no different to having a holiday booked.

[MaudBaileysGreenTurban]

@PollyPepper

YABU and Glastonbury is shit anyway.

Ridiculous thing to say; the OP clearly doesn't think it's shit.

[BornFreee]

"200 miles apart so once I am on site, I won’t be leaving!!"

A 3 hour drive each way and arrive back in time for the headline act, definitely do-able.

[Blueraccoon]

Go to the wedding and give the Glastonbury tickets to me!! 😄

[LalalalalalaLand123]

I am astonished than anyone would put a festival before a good friends wedding. It would really tell me what a low priority I am to a friend that did that.

100% this.

[SayItBackwards]

Go to Glastonbury and have a fabulous time.
Life's too short.

[Cornettoninja]

Pre-planned and booked events trump a wedding invitation received afterwards in my book.

You’re basically going on holiday if you’re attending for five days and I wouldn’t expect anyone to cancel something they’d clearly planned for, booked and were looking forward to because I’d arranged my wedding for the same date.

With all the rearranging of holidays and weddings that has gone on throughout the pandemic I think there should be sympathy on both sides that it’s just not possible to avoid in some situations.

I would be as tactful as possible but clear that my plans were long awaited and meant a lot to me so although sad, I would be declining the invitation.

[MyDcAreMarvel]

Resentful, happy place etc. You really aren’t able to put others before yourself are you op?

[MMMarmite]

I'd politely decline and go to the festival unless it was an extremely close friend. But then, I'm not a big fan of weddings in general.

[Mysterian]

Tell her you'll go to her next wedding.

Or get her a lovely thoughtful present and mention that although you missed the wedding you'll be around for the next 80+ years of her marriage.