Stopping neighbours coming into my garden?

[niehgboursandgarden]

Sounds stupid doesn't it but how do I do this?

I have a 6ft fence. Not allowed to have a higher one as per council regs. I have a garden gate, that's kept locked.

I know they have been in there today because (as on previous occasions) a ball gets kicked over and a day or so later, it's suddenly not there. I saw the ball yesterday it was at least 20ft from the fence that separates our respective gardens so not like they could reach it from their garden.

I have been in all day but from my home office I cannot see my side gate nor the garden (I work at the front of the house so I can see deliveries etc). I am sick of the intrusion, I rarely ever use my garden because I don't feel safe out there, I only go out there if my DP or DC are with me.

What can I do? I don't think a camera would deter them. I'm sick of feeling I have no privacy.

If I confront them they will laugh and say I'm mental. And then I'll have months of the kids name calling me, and DP when he's here (he works away).

Moving is not an option for a couple of years yet and I am wary of escalating any dispute because then I'd have to declare it when I came to sell. I just want them to stop coming in my bloody garden!

@FAQs

It’s actually irritating having balls coming over into your garden if it’s often. OP old neighbours kids did this so I told them not to come in and I’ll check my garden each evening and if I spotted one I’ll chuck it back over. Would that work, if they don’t get it do you send them back over?

They have 20 or so balls, so every few days one sails over. They do knock (well actually they bang on the glass of my front door (despite having a letterbox and a bell, but anyway), and we do throw the balls back - admittedly not always the same day they knock but the day after at the latest . I don't stab the balls and refuse to return them or that kind of thing.

Sometimes they don't knock and come in and take them instead, I don't know why. I'd just like them not to enter my garden when they feel like it.

Definitely put up a camera and throw the ball back. Document any incidents. Whatever the history, the camera will give you a clearer idea of what's happening and help with proof for any issues down the line. It's not much comfort at the moment but in a couple of years time the kids are unlikely to be playing footie in the garden. If they're only coming in to fetch the ball then hopefully that may ease your mind a little.

OP, are you stressed about something else?

Whenever things like this get to me, it's usually because a bigger thing is going on in the background.

@niehgboursandgarden that would annoy me also, it’s not unreasonable to ask they don’t come into your garden. As you are throwing them back they should wait.

Nail your fences in and put anti vandal paint along the top?

I think I'd just throw the ball over when I saw it though

Have you tried just returning the ball in some kind of timely fashion? It would seem like the whole thing(them going into your garden and them shouting at you) revolves around you not returning balls for 24hrs even when they knock and ask if you could return the ball. My house and garden doesn't sound as vast as yours but it would take me 3 mins to chuck the ball back over, it might be annoying but 3 mins a few times a week in return for a quiet life would be worth it to me.

@IceLace100

OP, are you stressed about something else?

Whenever things like this get to me, it's usually because a bigger thing is going on in the background.

Not at all, I'm fortunate that my life is actually very good aside from this neighbour issue. However rarely using my garden, or being constantly on edge that they're going to let themselves into it is quite an impact.

My neighbours on the other side are lovely (their children are no trouble at all and manage never to kick a ball over) before anyone wants to tell me I am clearly the problem.

Can't believe some of the posters on here.

Why should someone be expected to continually hand back people's property when it lands in their garden? They shouldn't have to go out of their way and inconveince themselves.

The neighbours are clearly very rude and horrible, and OP doesn't like conflict.

It's downright wrong for them to enter your property and absolutely fine for you to have a problem with it, OP. I would hate it too.

They should politely ring your doorbell and ask for it back, and wait until a time convenient for you to get it back.

I don't have any solutions but just want to reassure you that you aren't BU, but most of the posters on this thread are.

@RickJames

Sounds annoying but why not just throw the ball back as soon as you see it?

That's what I thought.

If your neighbours verbally abuse you then it is a police matter. Why do they fo it? A log of all needs to be kept of all.
What is the back story. It can't br just because of balls in your gardeni

Can you fit a lock on your garden gate?

You have my sympathy OP, they sound like horrible people to live next door to. I don’t know what the answer is though if the suggestions already given won’t work.

Could be foxes

@Mynameismargot

Have you tried just returning the ball in some kind of timely fashion? It would seem like the whole thing(them going into your garden and them shouting at you) revolves around you not returning balls for 24hrs even when they knock and ask if you could return the ball. My house and garden doesn't sound as vast as yours but it would take me 3 mins to chuck the ball back over, it might be annoying but 3 mins a few times a week in return for a quiet life would be worth it to me.

We used to throw balls over once we saw them, or when they knocked, even if it was inconvenient to us. It made no difference to the shouting, sitting on fence, namecalling. They didn't climb over then admittedly but I think that was simple physics in that a couple of years ago the kids were smaller and couldn't manage to get over and back.

I'm sorry that the children shout things at you. What are some examples of what they say?
There are several things you can do about the fence, eg cat spikes that may deter them climbing over but you can claim are there for a totally different reason.

If it was me, I'd be making very good use of their churchgoing and how they would prefer their fellow churchgoers see them but if you're scared of them you may not want to go down that road.

Re being in your garden alone, try earphones so you can listen to music. That will allow you to be in your garden, looking like you don't give a shit.

When you are dealing with very unreasonable people you do have to be careful how you handle them because in most cases they're just dying for you to do something they can use as a reason to escalate.

@Cryalot2

If your neighbours verbally abuse you then it is a police matter. Why do they fo it? A log of all needs to be kept of all. What is the back story. It can't br just because of balls in your gardeni

See my post of 16.50. That explains why it started.

Logging with the police becomes a neighbour dispute which I'll need to declare when I come to sell my house.

Have you ever asked them not to trespass in your garden , properly ?

I would add trellis to your fence . I think that is normally permitted . And something on your gate like a sign .

Please do not trespass in my garden . We will through balls back when we find them .

@Plumtree391

Can you fit a lock on your garden gate?

The gate is locked. It has a key lock, and is kept locked at all times.

Throw,!

@niehgboursandgarden

I do not want to be subjected to verbal abuse when I'm in my garden which is what usually happens unless I go out there with DC or my DP.

the gate is 6ft, and is also always locked. they are either climbing over the gate or over the fence, or lifting a panel. I have lots of spiky plants and nettles but it doesn't seem to make a jot of difference.

Brackets so they can’t slide the panels up

www.amazon.co.uk/Dorgerove-Security-Brackets-Concrete-Wooden/dp/B085HVJSY7/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?hvlocphy=9045255&psc=1&hvnetw=g&keywords=fence+panel+brackets&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUExVlZWRDRFWFVWUkZRJmVuY3J5cHRlZElkPUEwMTkzMjAzMlcxV1VITEIxWlo4WCZlbmNyeXB0ZWRBZElkPUEwNzI0OTk4NUpZQ0owUTI3V0JTJndpZGdldE5hbWU9c3BfYXRmJmFjdGlvbj1jbGlja1JlZGlyZWN0JmRvTm90TG9nQ2xpY2s9dHJ1ZQ==&hvadid=446874707989&qid=1630426290&dchild=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwpreJBhDvARIsAF1_BU1EwZc9Obld5Sf-BUVEZhsJLC1RCXYsB69tAkxjxwW1nobt3XGjDuYaAvqGEALw_wcB&hydadcr=11666_1779345&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&hvtargid=kwd-312214144700&adgrpid=101121939102&hvrand=7462459300021749831&sr=8-1-spons

sprinkler system which can be operated from house or is timed for frequent short periods?

@IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves op said they call her names such as mental and stupid. They do sound like arseholes tbf.

Didn't you post about this before? I'm pretty sure I've read this recently.

They're in social house and you own?

Oh sorry, I just saw your post where you give examples.
Camera that records sound would be good. Plus a big sign announcing it

How about having a word and agreeing to throwing them back once per day