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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

WIBU discharging myself from hospital

388 replies

Carrottopppp · 30/08/2021 07:43

Sorry if this is long but it's important I tell you every detail to give the full story. Saturday evening I woke from a nap to find myself really sore and swollen in my groin and part of my pubis, overnight it swelled considerably went really red and painful to walk, sit, stand etc, I called OOH gp Sunday morning who got me an urgent appointment at our urgent treatment centre within A&E. App was at 9.30am with an absolutely lovely doctor who left no stone unturned and said I had developed an abscess and it needed draining urgently due to the risk of sepsis and the fact it had literally appeared out of nowhere and had grown 4x4 inches literally overnight. He got me an appointment with emergency surgical ambulatory care for 2.15pm yesterday, I attended the nurse took one look and said "no surgeon on this ward will touch that as it is on your pubis not your groin" she sent me back to urgent care and the doctor I saw that morning took me back to his room had another look then said its definitely a groin abscess but we'll let gynae have a look anyway, he sent me up to the gynae ward, 3 different doctors took a look but it was the most senior surgeon on the ward who said it actually is groin, not his area of expertise and also due to the amount of blood vessels in the area he couldn't touch it, so I waited and he came back and said I had to go back to emergency surgical ambulatory care as its them who deal with these things. So off I went an as soon as I walked in I was met by the same nurse who told me she had spoken to a surgeon up on surgical assessment ward and that they were waiting for me and expecting me and I may be treated as a golden patient I. E doctor has a look at it then books me a time to go back the next day and have it removed so off I went up to the ward.

Now this is where I started losing my rag mentally, met by a nurse on the ward who asks another lady to show me to my bed and she said "ill be with you in a minute" yeah you guessed it, never saw her again. I was shown my bed obs done and that's it never saw anybody again, nobody knew when the doctor was coming to speak to me, nobody could tell me whether or not I could eat or drink by this point I hadn't eaten in 26 hours, Its on my notes that I'm on antibiotics yet nobody asked if I was due any (I was but mine were at home as nobody told me when all this started that I would become an inpatient), I waited hours, I had absolutely no overnight stuff with me, I got frustrated and I went to the nurses station to let them know I'm discharging myself and have someone call me to arrange to go back in when it's convenient. The nurse couldn't even find the doctors number to call and ask permission to sign off the discharge, and with that I left.

So to clarify I'd been in and out of hospital for 12 hours, I was no further forward than knowing I had an abscess, i had 4 doctors, 2 nurses and a receptionist all having a gander at my genitals, I was passed from place to place, I walked in agony the entire length of our hospital 1/2 mile 3 times, nobody could tell me what the hell was happening and all the prodding and poking aggravated the abscess to the point it doubled in size and started spreading down my leg. WIBU, maybe I was but I was frustrated, tired and I hadn't eaten in 28 hours. I'm planning on attending A&E this morning and hopefully try and get somewhere, I'm due back in work tomorrow and need it removing as my job requires me to be on my feet for 8 hours a day and don't want to be walking around in pain.

OP posts:
Cherryberrybonbon · 01/09/2021 09:37

You have been very stupid, sorry for choice of word! I’m a nurse and you have to realise, as frustrating as it as it is and annoying as that nurse who greeted you probably felt stupid as you were back, you are one of hundreds of people with a problem, it’s prioritised and dealt with. The nursing staff should have cared for you better, did they not give you a call bell? No one was able to answer your questions and try and sort anything out? Really you e just wasted your own and the hospitals time and put yourself and more risk of the infection spreading. Hope you get sorted soon, don’t be surprised if you go back to A&E and the same thing happens again

ConstanceGracy · 01/09/2021 09:41

Ah blimey, op!
Glad you’ve had it drained now and really hope you start to feel better now.
Post your sick note tracked next day delivery, they do not need you to physically hand it to them!
Reminds me of when my dh came back from a work trip to Manilla, he had a shooting pain in his arm and back and they thought it was a heart attack so rushed him there and they still had us sitting in urgent care for 5 hours not knowing what was going on.
It was actually kidney stones but I don’t fancy anyone’s chances if it was a heart attack!

NotAVegan · 01/09/2021 09:44

Glad you got it sorted.
Now take those two weeks!
I was given 2 weeks (posted above, had appendicitis removed friday). But I don't have an open wound - you do. Since coming home I've also realised that the emotional stuff takes time to recover from too.
Wishing you a speedy recovery

Muchmorethan · 01/09/2021 10:17

[quote Carrottopppp]@Muchmorethan it became clear during the surgery that apparently it wasn't an abscess but a sebaceous cyst that normally cause no problems has somehow become very infected, how have I had a sebaceous cyst surely I would have known I had one, I'm down that area every 2 weeks giving it a trim, anyway because I've apparently had an SC I'm more likely going to get another and its most likely going to go the same way. In regards to my job, I work for a well known supermarket brand in their distribution centre taking products on a pallet using a pedestrian powered pallet truck (walking with it not driving) from one side of the warehouse to the other and putting said products in cages/dollies, I cover an average of 7 miles a day so I'm on my feet constantly, so much pressure from employer as we are severely understaffed, they have brought staff in but the work is just constant, warehouse is packed and crowded with staff but there's just too much work so don't like people taking time off work we are constantly under pressure to do overtime or work on our rest days[/quote]
In regards the cyst, as long as they removed the cyst sac, then hopefully it shouldn't reoccur. On the positive side, now you've had this experience if another one should appear you'll catch it much earlier and may be able to get it treated before it get's infected.

Your job is very physical which will prove difficult to do currently. So sorry that you are in this situation as it is really crap.

Zombiemum1946 · 01/09/2021 10:58

As its a cyst and not an abcess things should be better very quickly. You'll hopefully be reassured and know what to look out for in the future whilst trimming. Glad it's all gone well.

Rosscameasdoody · 01/09/2021 11:09

[quote Carrottopppp]@Muchmorethan it became clear during the surgery that apparently it wasn't an abscess but a sebaceous cyst that normally cause no problems has somehow become very infected, how have I had a sebaceous cyst surely I would have known I had one, I'm down that area every 2 weeks giving it a trim, anyway because I've apparently had an SC I'm more likely going to get another and its most likely going to go the same way. In regards to my job, I work for a well known supermarket brand in their distribution centre taking products on a pallet using a pedestrian powered pallet truck (walking with it not driving) from one side of the warehouse to the other and putting said products in cages/dollies, I cover an average of 7 miles a day so I'm on my feet constantly, so much pressure from employer as we are severely understaffed, they have brought staff in but the work is just constant, warehouse is packed and crowded with staff but there's just too much work so don't like people taking time off work we are constantly under pressure to do overtime or work on our rest days[/quote]
My partner’s abscess- detailed upthread - like yourself, it turned out to be an infected cyst. It was in his cheek and extended into his neck. This was determined during the surgery and the surgeon removed the pouch and detritus around the cyst so that it wouldn’t come back. I realise that the area affected in your case is different but are you sure surgeon hasn’t done the same ? As with your previous issues, this is about communication - ask, if you’re not sure. And if it turns out that the pouch hasn’t been removed, ask why not - there will be a good reason, possibly to do with the proximity of major blood vessels etc.

And no, you wouldn’t know if you had a sebaceous cyst, no matter how often you’re ‘down there’. As in your case, and that of my partner, they can present overnight if they’re infected and they can look like abscesses - the surgeon won’t know for sure until they operate.

Rosscameasdoody · 01/09/2021 11:12

Sorry, posted too soon. My partner’s surgery left a fair sized cavity behind and this still had to be packed every day while it healed - this is so it heals from the inside and doesn’t leave an indentation. It can go on for some time - district nurses and antibiotics at home for a few weeks, so be prepared.

justasking111 · 01/09/2021 12:16

Take a picture of your sick note hard copy to follow in the post send that to them just say ACAS advice

OneTC · 01/09/2021 13:36

I had a sebaceous cyst removed about 25 years ago and they said I'd be prone to getting them again and (touch wood) there's never been another

whatfreshheck · 01/09/2021 13:55

Not sure if the OP is aware but there is a pandemic on! Our ward has one nurse to 19 patients. Some of which will be a damn site sicker than OP who throughout all this was mobile, conscious and lucid. Staff are being redeployed all over the place and we didn't have enough pre-pandemic. I'm sorry you feel poorly treated but we can only do so much. We are doing our best.

justasking111 · 01/09/2021 14:00

@whatfreshheck

Not sure if the OP is aware but there is a pandemic on! Our ward has one nurse to 19 patients. Some of which will be a damn site sicker than OP who throughout all this was mobile, conscious and lucid. Staff are being redeployed all over the place and we didn't have enough pre-pandemic. I'm sorry you feel poorly treated but we can only do so much. We are doing our best.
Well that does depend which hospital trust she is in to be fair we're not all in covid hotspots
whatfreshheck · 01/09/2021 14:02

Justasking11 I'm not in a "Covid hotspot" either!

cultkid · 06/09/2021 16:14

How are you OP?

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