WIBU discharging myself from hospital

[Carrottopppp]

Sorry if this is long but it's important I tell you every detail to give the full story. Saturday evening I woke from a nap to find myself really sore and swollen in my groin and part of my pubis, overnight it swelled considerably went really red and painful to walk, sit, stand etc, I called OOH gp Sunday morning who got me an urgent appointment at our urgent treatment centre within A&E. App was at 9.30am with an absolutely lovely doctor who left no stone unturned and said I had developed an abscess and it needed draining urgently due to the risk of sepsis and the fact it had literally appeared out of nowhere and had grown 4x4 inches literally overnight. He got me an appointment with emergency surgical ambulatory care for 2.15pm yesterday, I attended the nurse took one look and said "no surgeon on this ward will touch that as it is on your pubis not your groin" she sent me back to urgent care and the doctor I saw that morning took me back to his room had another look then said its definitely a groin abscess but we'll let gynae have a look anyway, he sent me up to the gynae ward, 3 different doctors took a look but it was the most senior surgeon on the ward who said it actually is groin, not his area of expertise and also due to the amount of blood vessels in the area he couldn't touch it, so I waited and he came back and said I had to go back to emergency surgical ambulatory care as its them who deal with these things. So off I went an as soon as I walked in I was met by the same nurse who told me she had spoken to a surgeon up on surgical assessment ward and that they were waiting for me and expecting me and I may be treated as a golden patient I. E doctor has a look at it then books me a time to go back the next day and have it removed so off I went up to the ward.

Now this is where I started losing my rag mentally, met by a nurse on the ward who asks another lady to show me to my bed and she said "ill be with you in a minute" yeah you guessed it, never saw her again. I was shown my bed obs done and that's it never saw anybody again, nobody knew when the doctor was coming to speak to me, nobody could tell me whether or not I could eat or drink by this point I hadn't eaten in 26 hours, Its on my notes that I'm on antibiotics yet nobody asked if I was due any (I was but mine were at home as nobody told me when all this started that I would become an inpatient), I waited hours, I had absolutely no overnight stuff with me, I got frustrated and I went to the nurses station to let them know I'm discharging myself and have someone call me to arrange to go back in when it's convenient. The nurse couldn't even find the doctors number to call and ask permission to sign off the discharge, and with that I left.

So to clarify I'd been in and out of hospital for 12 hours, I was no further forward than knowing I had an abscess, i had 4 doctors, 2 nurses and a receptionist all having a gander at my genitals, I was passed from place to place, I walked in agony the entire length of our hospital 1/2 mile 3 times, nobody could tell me what the hell was happening and all the prodding and poking aggravated the abscess to the point it doubled in size and started spreading down my leg. WIBU, maybe I was but I was frustrated, tired and I hadn't eaten in 28 hours. I'm planning on attending A&E this morning and hopefully try and get somewhere, I'm due back in work tomorrow and need it removing as my job requires me to be on my feet for 8 hours a day and don't want to be walking around in pain.

Think of it as being on a shelf until they have time to look at you. Wards are just holding pens in a que. Try to view it as dispassionately as possible and mentally disengage as possible.
There is no point is taking it personally as being left waiting and lack of communication isn't personal - it's just part of the system.

@TatianaBis much of the NHS's present problems arise from 1997-2010 when the Blair Governments allowed PFI arrangements to run roughshod to provide the impression of investment, from pumping money into PCTs, etc.

How many countries with worse health are systems than the UK would be defined as first world; and finally

Resources do not determine why nursing/admin staff speak to patients like dirt on their shoe and shout too often - it's a cultural issue and tied up with the service being "free" and something the (great unwashed) public should be grateful for.

Whilst the bureaucracy can do one's head in in France, the service standards and general courtesy is so much better.

Glad to hear you’re back in hospital, I hope things get sorted.
Timescales cannot be estimated as cases are done in order of clinical priority.

@TooManyAnimals94

I said YANBU to feel frustrated and angry but at the same time, have you never been on a hospital ward before? This is how it is in our crappy health service. They get you on a ward which is convenient for them because they know where you are and they can get to you whenever. There are not enough nurses to actually care for patients, they just have to.move from one crisis to the next and doctors can just waltz on and off wards as they please...I'm sure the nurses were just as annoyed with the doctor as you were. Also not really sure what you think will be any different you present at A&E..they won't be able to treat you in A&E so you will be admitted, and start the whole merry-go-round again. So essentially, sorry this happened to you but don't think discharging yourself was the best way to go. Could nobody have brought you some overnight stuff and your meds?

Doctors waltz on and off as they please?

Last time I "waltzed off a ward" when I was in the middle of doing something it was a cardiac arrest call on another ward in the middle of the night. We don't waltz on and off, we go between the MULTIPLE wards we are covering trying to prioritise the emergencies.

The patient in the cardiac arrest died, I got their vomit all over my arms and I had to go straight back to the patient I had left, carry on assessing them and act as though nothing had happened. Doctors and nurses are a TEAM.

OP I'm sorry you had a shite time, but don't leave again! You'll have to go through the faff of A&E etc or whatever is needed to get a bed. I recommend speaking to PALS about your experience. And if you go to hospital always bring phone charger etc as it's often a long wait. Hope you get it sorted. xx

I'm admitted all the time, a bed after 12 hours is good tbh. Longest I've been in a and e is 34 hours.

You didn't need supplies overnight, the ward would have had toothpaste and brush, slipper socks, pyjamas and you could have got supplies in the morning.

You would have been admitted to an assessment ward, doctors work 24 hours so you would have been seen, it could have been at any point through the night.

You need treatment, I'm confused as to why you'd discharge yourself only to have to start the process again

How are you doing? Xx

@RosesAndHellebores

Compare and contrast however: France - unstable fracture Prompt ambulance Taken directly to a hospital with acute, emergency orthopaedic facilities Booked in, Xrayed, seen promptly by a specialist Dr and arm put in half slab. Nurses general Dr concerned about other injuries/grazes etc Within two hours in a private room with private bath (option to pay for this) and made comfortable and kept informed. Surgery undertaken (other emergencies) within 48 hours - discharged 6 hrs after surgery with 10 day supply of pain relief and local physician visited within first 24 hours of being home. Hospital Dr called the next day. Have correspondence and cd of Xrays for UK Dr's when we are home.

UK
Wait for ambulance
8-10 hours in A&E waiting room
Reduction in resus
Utter chaos and limited communication alongside staff speaking rudely to all and sundry
No specialists at hospital
Patched up and sent home with 3 days' pain relief and told to make Dr's apt for more.
Call two days later to say pins and plates needed, reduction couldn't have helped, come in Tuesday am. Tuesday day care runs out of time and no beds so sent home. Back Wednesday - op takes place at 3pmish. Home by 8pm. Go to GP if you need more pain relief.

France last weekend; UK mother 2019.
Tell me which is better for the patient and which is more cost effective.

I vote for a continental social care system every time and the staff in it don't assume the patient is either always wrong or there is a need to raise their voice.

France spends more on healthcare than the UK. And has more doctors per head of population. We get what we pay for. And people keep voting in people who won't even pay peanuts.

I'm not prepared to pay more so NHS staff can continue to speak roughly to and raise their voices unnecessarily. I have often wondered if nurses/HCA's take a module in "eyerolling". It's all rather chicken and egg.

[quote RosesAndHellebores]@TatianaBis much of the NHS's present problems arise from 1997-2010 when the Blair Governments allowed PFI arrangements to run roughshod to provide the impression of investment, from pumping money into PCTs, etc.

How many countries with worse health are systems than the UK would be defined as first world; and finally

Resources do not determine why nursing/admin staff speak to patients like dirt on their shoe and shout too often - it's a cultural issue and tied up with the service being "free" and something the (great unwashed) public should be grateful for.

Whilst the bureaucracy can do one's head in in France, the service standards and general courtesy is so much better.[/quote]
Keep telling yourself that love. I’m old enough to remember the NHS in the 80s: no beds, no doctors, no money, endless waiting lists. I had to wait a year to see a specialist when I was 18.

PFI was invented by John Major’s government.

The Labour government pumped money into the NHS because they believed in its fundamental importance as a state institution.

I’m half French & the idea that that all French medics sont tous gentilles et charmants est marrant.

Go back on a "normal" working day. Weekends and bank holidays are never good in the NHS - it's skeleton staff and the senior doctors etc are mostly on call, and the ward staff/junior doctors won't want to call them out unless absolutely essential.

"Normal" working days are completely different. It's supposed to be a 24/7 health service, but it simply isn't. If you're in dire straits, i.e. road accident or heart attack, then you'll get the treatment you need as the requisite staff will be called out. But for "routine" things that aren't immediately life threatening, it's more a matter of admitting you and monitoring you until the next normal working day.

Yes @TatianaBis, but you would get a fine elegant shrug and tut for your health insurance premiums - none of your eyerolling in La Belle France.

(Seriously, British nurses are no louder than any others that I've noticed, and nurses are quite an international bunch wherever you are).

[quote RosesAndHellebores]@TatianaBis much of the NHS's present problems arise from 1997-2010 when the Blair Governments allowed PFI arrangements to run roughshod to provide the impression of investment, from pumping money into PCTs, etc.

How many countries with worse health are systems than the UK would be defined as first world; and finally

Resources do not determine why nursing/admin staff speak to patients like dirt on their shoe and shout too often - it's a cultural issue and tied up with the service being "free" and something the (great unwashed) public should be grateful for.

Whilst the bureaucracy can do one's head in in France, the service standards and general courtesy is so much better.[/quote]
Fully agree with that. Blair thought the answer to the NHS was just to throw money at it. Well, it didn't work, did it? The answer is more money, hand in hand, with PROPER reform to turn it into a real World class health service. Money alone won't do that.

This thread is so ridiculous that I had to create an account to respond.

What on earth did you expect from a hospital? You are aware of the problems facing the NHS constantly right? Just because you're an emergency case, it doesn't mean that there aren't more urgent cases that will arise up until the second you're on the operating table in theatre.

A couple weeks ago I attended A&E with severe abdominal pain. I was directed to the hospital's GP who saw me immediately. I was sent to the surgical ward and waited in an examination room for around 8 hours before getting a bed. I had to stay 3 nights in total and stayed on 3 different wards. I was constantly waiting for doctors, painkillers, a bed, fluids, a scan, for discharge. But guess what? I didn't discharge myself or complain once. I thanked every member of staff who were clearly doing the best they could with the resources they had.
I have a young baby who I breastfeed, and I was super grateful that my baby and husband were allowed to stay with me the whole of day 1, and to visit me, despite being on a ward that doesn't allow visitors. I was grateful for the breast pump they provided me too.
I was nil by mouth on day 2 and then told surgery would be on day 3 so would need to be nil by mouth for another day. But I didn't purposely starve myself. Instead, I politely asked a nurse for some food before the next cut off point before my surgery.
Like you, I also came to hospital without a bag, but I survived on the toiletries and pyjamas the hospital provided until my husband came back on day 2 to visit and bring me a bag of belongings.
My husband made the 60 mile round trip each day with our young baby because, like you, I was having a health emergency that couldn't be planned for OR avoided.
I also have anxiety, but I just had faith in the medical professionals (who have studied for years and been in their jobs for years) to make the best judgement for me.
I was away from my baby for 3 days and it was awful, but I was so grateful for the wonderful care I received, even if slow. I'm grateful that I had my issue diagnosed and treated with major surgery in just 3 days, and I could go back home the day after surgery. I'm grateful that I don't have a medical bill of hundreds of thousands of pounds like others would have in this situation. I'm grateful for being provided with 3 meals, plus drinks and snacks each day. I'm grateful for being helped out of bed after waking up from anaesthesia.

As for going back to work OP... even if you have surgery right this minute, you will NOT be going to work tomorrow. This absence will not affect your employer's decision to continue your employment after your probationary period. If it does, you can take them to an employment tribunal because that would be illegal.

As for your children, they need to learn the realities of life and that there are medical emergencies which means people have to stay in hospital away from home sometimes. They don't need to be worried beyond belief.

I hope you thank them for the nurses for their care.

That doesn't mean you can't eat either side of the dose! It's an either/or choice.

one hour before OR 2 hours after!

Funnily enough I'm aware of that considering I was the one who posted it

I was just guessing the type of antibiotic based on knowing that's what they say (clearly recognising the op has misread!)

@itsgettingwierd

That doesn't mean you can't eat either side of the dose! It's an either/or choice.

one hour before OR 2 hours after!

Funnily enough I'm aware of that considering I was the one who posted it

I was just guessing the type of antibiotic based on knowing that's what they say (clearly recognising the op has misread!)

I realised that I'm sorry if it came over otherwise!

I was just trying to emphasise it for the drama queen who (deliberately?) misunderstood.

Can I just clear something up? Yes it is a bank holiday weekend but there will still be senior doctors in the hospital or oncall to come in and junior doctors are not babies who can’t do anything as one poster implied! I’m a junior doctor with 12 years as a doctor and 6 and a bit years in my speciality with a bit more to go before I’m a consultant. I call my boss when I need them at a drop of a hat, my last night shift my boss was in at 4am with me due to a really sick patient. Yes staffing is altered out of hours but there will still be expert teams there 24/7!

@TatianaBis if TBliars government had thought a J Major initiative had been wrong I imagine they would have stopped it rather than growing it exponentially. Bliar's government indeed pumped money in by creating additional layers of bureaucracy, PCT's, rather than on patient care or improved nursing. I had my first in 94 and last in 98. Midwives were complaining more loudly about lack of resources in 98 than 94. That was after our local hospital closed in 97 - within 12 months of the Bliar victory.

Hope that makes sense luvvy, or would you prefer duckie?

Fully agree with that. Blair thought the answer to the NHS was just to throw money at it. Well, it didn't work, did it? The answer is more money, hand in hand, with PROPER reform to turn it into a real World class health service. Money alone won't do that.

What you think fistfuls of notes were thrown at the NHS with nothing to spend it on? The money was spent on reforms and cutting the waiting lists. Just walking into hospital at the end of the Labour admin compared to the end of the 80s - was stark. So much more funding.

The hospital wasn't even busy, I went to urgent care twice and I was the only one in there, I passed A&E 3 times and again nobody in there either, all 3 wards I attended again nurses, doctors etc all stood around with next to no patients.

I wish I knew where this hospital was. On a bank holiday weekend the usual wait for A&E in my area is 8 hours.

[quote RosesAndHellebores]@TatianaBis if TBliars government had thought a J Major initiative had been wrong I imagine they would have stopped it rather than growing it exponentially. Bliar's government indeed pumped money in by creating additional layers of bureaucracy, PCT's, rather than on patient care or improved nursing. I had my first in 94 and last in 98. Midwives were complaining more loudly about lack of resources in 98 than 94. That was after our local hospital closed in 97 - within 12 months of the Bliar victory.

Hope that makes sense luvvy, or would you prefer duckie?[/quote]
I couldn't stand Blair and quite liked Major but, frankly, if a hospital closed in '97 (and therefore less then 8 months after Labour took power) it's much more likely to be the fault of the previous administration . . .

Little update, went to A&E spoke to a lovely nurse practitioner who called the surgical registrar and asked if she could have a look at me and agreed she'd see me back in A&E, got to A&E which surprisingly wasn't that busy, surgical registrar took one look and said it needs draining ASAP, she said luckily she has no surgery booked for this evening, it's under general and I will need it packing and redressing every day for the next 2 weeks and I can go home tomorrow. just waiting now to go up to the ward and sign consent form.

You won't be going back to work the following day, that's for sure.

[quote RosesAndHellebores]@TatianaBis if TBliars government had thought a J Major initiative had been wrong I imagine they would have stopped it rather than growing it exponentially. Bliar's government indeed pumped money in by creating additional layers of bureaucracy, PCT's, rather than on patient care or improved nursing. I had my first in 94 and last in 98. Midwives were complaining more loudly about lack of resources in 98 than 94. That was after our local hospital closed in 97 - within 12 months of the Bliar victory.

Hope that makes sense luvvy, or would you prefer duckie?[/quote]
Of course it doesn’t make sense: it’s poorly researched, convoluted Tory whiffle.

@Carrottopppp

Little update, went to A&E spoke to a lovely nurse practitioner who called the surgical registrar and asked if she could have a look at me and agreed she'd see me back in A&E, got to A&E which surprisingly wasn't that busy, surgical registrar took one look and said it needs draining ASAP, she said luckily she has no surgery booked for this evening, it's under general and I will need it packing and redressing every day for the next 2 weeks and I can go home tomorrow. just waiting now to go up to the ward and sign consent form.

I’m not going to even touch the rest of the thread before now; doesn’t matter at this point. I know you’ve mentioned you’re nervous about general anesthesia and hate hospitals; I feel exactly the same. Try to stay distracted however you can until the surgery tonight, or you may already be there (I know you’ll feel nervous anyway), it should be a quicker surgery, and do NOT try to rush yourself to get back in your feet when you go home next day more quickly than they tell you to, especially with a packed abscess if it’s large enough to need packing every single day for two weeks, or it will become much, much more sore. I had a groin abscess that was tiny in comparison to yours, just large enough to need packing, and I still had to be careful. Good luck and feel better, OP and maybe after

It sounds similar to a pilonidal sinus I had years ago. Hideously painful!!
Don't underestimate the disruption and discomfort of the aftercare with packing the wound (which is so it heals from the base upwards and doesn't heal over to form a cavity which can lead to further infection).
You are unlikely to be able to go back to work for a little while.