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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

WIBU discharging myself from hospital

388 replies

Carrottopppp · 30/08/2021 07:43

Sorry if this is long but it's important I tell you every detail to give the full story. Saturday evening I woke from a nap to find myself really sore and swollen in my groin and part of my pubis, overnight it swelled considerably went really red and painful to walk, sit, stand etc, I called OOH gp Sunday morning who got me an urgent appointment at our urgent treatment centre within A&E. App was at 9.30am with an absolutely lovely doctor who left no stone unturned and said I had developed an abscess and it needed draining urgently due to the risk of sepsis and the fact it had literally appeared out of nowhere and had grown 4x4 inches literally overnight. He got me an appointment with emergency surgical ambulatory care for 2.15pm yesterday, I attended the nurse took one look and said "no surgeon on this ward will touch that as it is on your pubis not your groin" she sent me back to urgent care and the doctor I saw that morning took me back to his room had another look then said its definitely a groin abscess but we'll let gynae have a look anyway, he sent me up to the gynae ward, 3 different doctors took a look but it was the most senior surgeon on the ward who said it actually is groin, not his area of expertise and also due to the amount of blood vessels in the area he couldn't touch it, so I waited and he came back and said I had to go back to emergency surgical ambulatory care as its them who deal with these things. So off I went an as soon as I walked in I was met by the same nurse who told me she had spoken to a surgeon up on surgical assessment ward and that they were waiting for me and expecting me and I may be treated as a golden patient I. E doctor has a look at it then books me a time to go back the next day and have it removed so off I went up to the ward.

Now this is where I started losing my rag mentally, met by a nurse on the ward who asks another lady to show me to my bed and she said "ill be with you in a minute" yeah you guessed it, never saw her again. I was shown my bed obs done and that's it never saw anybody again, nobody knew when the doctor was coming to speak to me, nobody could tell me whether or not I could eat or drink by this point I hadn't eaten in 26 hours, Its on my notes that I'm on antibiotics yet nobody asked if I was due any (I was but mine were at home as nobody told me when all this started that I would become an inpatient), I waited hours, I had absolutely no overnight stuff with me, I got frustrated and I went to the nurses station to let them know I'm discharging myself and have someone call me to arrange to go back in when it's convenient. The nurse couldn't even find the doctors number to call and ask permission to sign off the discharge, and with that I left.

So to clarify I'd been in and out of hospital for 12 hours, I was no further forward than knowing I had an abscess, i had 4 doctors, 2 nurses and a receptionist all having a gander at my genitals, I was passed from place to place, I walked in agony the entire length of our hospital 1/2 mile 3 times, nobody could tell me what the hell was happening and all the prodding and poking aggravated the abscess to the point it doubled in size and started spreading down my leg. WIBU, maybe I was but I was frustrated, tired and I hadn't eaten in 28 hours. I'm planning on attending A&E this morning and hopefully try and get somewhere, I'm due back in work tomorrow and need it removing as my job requires me to be on my feet for 8 hours a day and don't want to be walking around in pain.

OP posts:
MsHedgehog · 30/08/2021 18:33

You are extremely lucky that they can do it tonight after you discharged yourself last night and I’m genuinely pleased for you that it can be sorted so quickly. Good luck and please please please take care of yourself!

patchoulicloud · 30/08/2021 18:34

@Carrottopppp

Little update, went to A&E spoke to a lovely nurse practitioner who called the surgical registrar and asked if she could have a look at me and agreed she'd see me back in A&E, got to A&E which surprisingly wasn't that busy, surgical registrar took one look and said it needs draining ASAP, she said luckily she has no surgery booked for this evening, it's under general and I will need it packing and redressing every day for the next 2 weeks and I can go home tomorrow. just waiting now to go up to the ward and sign consent form.
I'm glad you'll be sorted soon.

Just to warn you though, 2 weeks packing sounds very optimistic so don't be surprised if it's longer. I was told a couple of days and that was absolute bollocks!

Good luck!

Fangdango · 30/08/2021 18:39

Thanks for letting us know - good luck Flowers

sprinkleyumnut · 30/08/2021 18:40

YANBU to discharge yourself from that hospital, but please definitely go to another hospital OP

sprinkleyumnut · 30/08/2021 18:45

Absolutely vile treatment OP 💐

justasking111 · 30/08/2021 18:47

So glad you're being treated now. Take it easy afterwards Flowers

Mummyoflittledragon · 30/08/2021 18:49

That’s very good news. You’ll be fine. It’s a small surgery. Just the after care sounds rather yuk.

cultkid · 30/08/2021 18:51

So much love

I'm annoyed at the snide responses from people telling you to be grateful

It's more sustainable the way you did it

Well done xxx heaps of love G

Carrottopppp · 30/08/2021 19:00

Forgot to mention the nurse practitioner cleared up why the doctors were toing and froing over who needed to do it and apparently due to the size of it its sitting right on the border of my pubis and groin and apparently the femoral artery runs underneath where it is sitting so it was all about who was going to take that risk, it needs to be a general as it needs to be a large incision as they suspect it is running quite deep and want to make sure all is removed. Currently waiting in A&E for a bed up on the ward but it's for now being done tonight x

OP posts:
Sirzy · 30/08/2021 19:02

So pleased you went back. Hope it goes well.

Please take recovery seriously though don’t try to be superwoman (like too many of us do) rest and take care

Booknooks · 30/08/2021 19:02

Glad you've been seen again OP, all the best for your op :)

FatCatThinCat · 30/08/2021 19:06

I hope it all goes well for you. What a stressful weekend you've had.

Marcee · 30/08/2021 19:12

Glad it looks like it going to be sorted

diddl · 30/08/2021 19:13

All the best to you Op.

cptartapp · 30/08/2021 19:23

Glad you're getting sorted. But as a nurse that's packed many wounds in my thirty years, I think he was fobbing you off with the two weeks.
The way you describe it, be prepared for daily packing for a lot lot longer.

Anonymouslyposting · 30/08/2021 19:24

Glad to hear you’re now being taken care of - get well soon x

Rosscameasdoody · 30/08/2021 19:33

I’ve been in and out of hospitals for 60 years - never yet been spoken to ‘roughly’ by a member of staff. When you go into hospital you need to check your dignity at the door, and some people just can’t handle that - as evidenced by the OP finding it challenging to have to show her bits to several different doctors, when it’s just part of the process to get you to the right person

What I HAVE seen is staff being sworn at, patients attempting to assault them, etc. I’ve also seen patients speaking to staff in the most unpleasant and entitled ways - more so since Covid.

PFI wasn’t Tony Blair, it was John Major and the problems the NHS faces now is as a result of years of cuts and chaotic reorganisation, and the pandemic has shone a spotlight on the cumulative effects. As I said upthread - be careful who you vote for, because once the pandemic eases sufficiently, the NHS will once again be at the forefront of cuts when it’s time to pay off the debt.

KateTheEighth · 30/08/2021 19:52

@Carrottopppp

Forgot to mention the nurse practitioner cleared up why the doctors were toing and froing over who needed to do it and apparently due to the size of it its sitting right on the border of my pubis and groin and apparently the femoral artery runs underneath where it is sitting so it was all about who was going to take that risk, it needs to be a general as it needs to be a large incision as they suspect it is running quite deep and want to make sure all is removed. Currently waiting in A&E for a bed up on the ward but it's for now being done tonight x
Hope it goes well OP

Speedy recovery Thanks

Motorina · 30/08/2021 20:08

That all sounds really promising. Well done on going back, and I hope you're on the mend soon.

Sciurus83 · 30/08/2021 20:13

God speed, hope it all goes well and you're on the mend soon Flowers

cookingisoverrated · 30/08/2021 20:15

Sounds like they were taking it incredibly seriously ... and then you just took yourself home.

I'm glad you've gone back and are having it treated. It sounds serious. I hope the surgery goes well.

HollowTalk · 30/08/2021 20:20

Best of luck for your operation tonight. I hope it goes really well and you're home soon.

HTH1 · 30/08/2021 20:27

Good luck OP x

RightYesButNo · 30/08/2021 20:34

France spends more on healthcare than the UK. And has more doctors per head of population. We get what we pay for. And people keep voting in people who won't even pay peanuts.

I know this is horribly off topic now but… no, they don’t. They spend 11.2% of their GDP. That’s €238 billion (£204 billion). We spend 12.8% of our GDP now. That’s £269 billion. We spend either 1.6% more of our GDP or an extra £65 billion. So whatever got @RosesAndHellebores the “French” difference, it cost £65 billion less per year. (And I did all the conversions. Made sure I’m not using pounds for one, Euros for another. Made sure I’m not using GDPs from the top of Google since they’re all in US dollars.) And I’d imagine the French have more doctors because they can pay them less, and they can pay them less because they start out with €0 debt, versus UK doctors with an average £82,000 in debt (source below others).

Sorry for participating in thread hijack.

Sources:
UK: www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/healthandsocialcare/healthcaresystem/bulletins/healthcareexpenditureukhealthaccountsprovisionalestimates/2020
France: data.worldbank.org/indicator/SH.XPD.CHEX.GD.ZS?locations=FR
www.statista.com/statistics/527774/gross-domestic-product-france-euros/
UK doctor debt: m.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2015/04/21/graduate-doctors-landed-82k-debt-cant-pay-back_n_7106744.html

MrsMaizel · 30/08/2021 20:35

@Carrottopppp

Forgot to mention the nurse practitioner cleared up why the doctors were toing and froing over who needed to do it and apparently due to the size of it its sitting right on the border of my pubis and groin and apparently the femoral artery runs underneath where it is sitting so it was all about who was going to take that risk, it needs to be a general as it needs to be a large incision as they suspect it is running quite deep and want to make sure all is removed. Currently waiting in A&E for a bed up on the ward but it's for now being done tonight x
Oh so is this your apology for slagging off the doctors and nurses earlier who were all "having a gander at your genitalia" ? Don't forget to sell your story to "Real People" 🙄