WIBU discharging myself from hospital

[Carrottopppp]

Sorry if this is long but it's important I tell you every detail to give the full story. Saturday evening I woke from a nap to find myself really sore and swollen in my groin and part of my pubis, overnight it swelled considerably went really red and painful to walk, sit, stand etc, I called OOH gp Sunday morning who got me an urgent appointment at our urgent treatment centre within A&E. App was at 9.30am with an absolutely lovely doctor who left no stone unturned and said I had developed an abscess and it needed draining urgently due to the risk of sepsis and the fact it had literally appeared out of nowhere and had grown 4x4 inches literally overnight. He got me an appointment with emergency surgical ambulatory care for 2.15pm yesterday, I attended the nurse took one look and said "no surgeon on this ward will touch that as it is on your pubis not your groin" she sent me back to urgent care and the doctor I saw that morning took me back to his room had another look then said its definitely a groin abscess but we'll let gynae have a look anyway, he sent me up to the gynae ward, 3 different doctors took a look but it was the most senior surgeon on the ward who said it actually is groin, not his area of expertise and also due to the amount of blood vessels in the area he couldn't touch it, so I waited and he came back and said I had to go back to emergency surgical ambulatory care as its them who deal with these things. So off I went an as soon as I walked in I was met by the same nurse who told me she had spoken to a surgeon up on surgical assessment ward and that they were waiting for me and expecting me and I may be treated as a golden patient I. E doctor has a look at it then books me a time to go back the next day and have it removed so off I went up to the ward.

Now this is where I started losing my rag mentally, met by a nurse on the ward who asks another lady to show me to my bed and she said "ill be with you in a minute" yeah you guessed it, never saw her again. I was shown my bed obs done and that's it never saw anybody again, nobody knew when the doctor was coming to speak to me, nobody could tell me whether or not I could eat or drink by this point I hadn't eaten in 26 hours, Its on my notes that I'm on antibiotics yet nobody asked if I was due any (I was but mine were at home as nobody told me when all this started that I would become an inpatient), I waited hours, I had absolutely no overnight stuff with me, I got frustrated and I went to the nurses station to let them know I'm discharging myself and have someone call me to arrange to go back in when it's convenient. The nurse couldn't even find the doctors number to call and ask permission to sign off the discharge, and with that I left.

So to clarify I'd been in and out of hospital for 12 hours, I was no further forward than knowing I had an abscess, i had 4 doctors, 2 nurses and a receptionist all having a gander at my genitals, I was passed from place to place, I walked in agony the entire length of our hospital 1/2 mile 3 times, nobody could tell me what the hell was happening and all the prodding and poking aggravated the abscess to the point it doubled in size and started spreading down my leg. WIBU, maybe I was but I was frustrated, tired and I hadn't eaten in 28 hours. I'm planning on attending A&E this morning and hopefully try and get somewhere, I'm due back in work tomorrow and need it removing as my job requires me to be on my feet for 8 hours a day and don't want to be walking around in pain.

I’m sorry that you are feeling lousy and hospital is never nice but unfortunately you either need to be patient and accept the care that is available to you or go private.

This is the state of the nhs under a Tory government in the middle of a pandemic. The doctors aren’t waltzing anywhere, they’re on their knees and in your case are dealing with something more urgent. You can go home in a strop but sepsis is serious so it’s an ill advised course of action.

I'd go back now OP, I can see why you did it as it sounds so frustrating,, especially as it would have taken a few mins to pop back and update you or be aware of what you're there for.

You’re being ridiculous. You need to prioritise your own health over you husband and boss’s convenience. And being seen as an emergency doesn’t mean you get operated on instantaneously. I think all you’ve achieved is wasted a lot of professionals time and delayed your own treatment further.

. They don’t admit people for shits and giggles. “Fair” doesn’t come in to it. The poster who described how emergency lists work is spot on. Emergency doesn’t mean immediate-you still need staff, theatre space and most urgent cases take priority over people’s waiting times.

I totally understand you’re frustrated and exhausted but you need to go back and get this sorted.

And it's the same theatres. So all that has happened is you might have missed a slot they could have fit you in and now more urgent cases might have turned up.

I'm still in my probationary period at work and have already had a day off due to carpal tunnel so I really don't want to be taking any more time off. I knew before I had discharged myself that I wasn't doing the right thing but I was tired, worrying about the children my job, the fact I had nothing with me, I hadn't eaten in 28 hours, the last time I went that long without food I was admitted to hospital as I nearly put myself in a coma and didn't want to risk it again and nobody would let me eat or drink until the doctor had been round, I hate hospitals, even after having a baby I get myself cleaned up let the baby be checked by the midwives and that's it I try discharging myself, I'm basically forced to stay for at least 6 hours but it's sends my anxiety through the roof and I hate that feeling

Surgical wards are covered by surgical doctors, unfortunately if they're in the middle of.... doing a surgery...they can't stop and pop to the ward. If it was out of hours, cover is incredibly thin and it only takes a couple medical emergencies or one major one to occupy all the doctors at once.

I agree 26 hours without food is barbaric, but unfortunately again until the surgeon responsible for your continuing care assesses the nurses can't make the unilateral decision to give you food. It would delay the surgery if the surgeon wanted to proceed immediately, and again you wouldn't be very happy.

Please do return to a&e this morning, with any luck they haven't given the bed to another surgical patient and you won't go straight back to the very beginning of the queue. You have definitely delayed your treatment by leaving, but I do understand it was a horrendous ordeal for you and I understand the reason. However it sounds like a very significant infection and the last thing you need is permanent damage to the groin and genital area.

I wouldn't anticipate being fit for work tomorrow, you'll be either preparing for surgery or recovering.

Fingers crossed for a much smoother treatment today OP, and wishes for uncomplicated healing. Please be aware that it is a bank holiday so hospitals still haven't returned to routine staff levels for doctors. Would suggest you take a night bag and any medications you take.

If you have complications from not getting your abscess treated you’ll be off work for much longer.

I know it’s frustrating, but “urgent” is lower priority than “emergency” so you should expect to wait a day or two for a surgical room to come available. I would not have discharged myself in your shoes especially since you said it had gotten worse since you were admitted. You’re just causing chaos because they have will unbooked your surgery slot when you discharged yourself, and now have to squeeze you in again when you go back to A&E again.

Sorry you're having an awful time

Please go back though! Urgently! You have a potentially life threatening condition and it needs treating quickly.

I understand that it's frustrating when you're on a ward and no one comes to you, but, did you ask the staff about antibiotics/spare night things? I know you shouldn't have to ask but they may well be very short staffed.

In terms of your job, you just explain that you are currently in hospital (giving as much detail as you feel comfortable with), you are hopeful that you will be discharged say tomorrow but will keep them informed.

I manage a team and if I got a message from one of them saying they were in hospital, I'd be messaging them back saying take care and don't worry about anything at work. Then, I deal with cover etc. It's my job to do it, that's what I signed up for.

@Carrottopppp

I'm still in my probationary period at work and have already had a day off due to carpal tunnel so I really don't want to be taking any more time off. I knew before I had discharged myself that I wasn't doing the right thing but I was tired, worrying about the children my job, the fact I had nothing with me, I hadn't eaten in 28 hours, the last time I went that long without food I was admitted to hospital as I nearly put myself in a coma and didn't want to risk it again and nobody would let me eat or drink until the doctor had been round, I hate hospitals, even after having a baby I get myself cleaned up let the baby be checked by the midwives and that's it I try discharging myself, I'm basically forced to stay for at least 6 hours but it's sends my anxiety through the roof and I hate that feeling

Sorry for the frustrating day(s) you've have but really I think this is an issue with you, not the hospital. Just go with expectations of a long wait, and wait, and go with the flow, and have the surgery. Work will have to suck it and you can take your discharge letter saying you've had literal emergency surgery if they have an issue.

No one wants to take time off work. I get it's stressful but you need to get this sorted.

Why hadn't you eaten in that long? You had an appointment at 9.30 where they then gave you one for 2.30 that day. So you were in hospital from 2.30pm till you discharged yourself in the evening? Obviously you should have been offered food but it's not really their fault if you hadn't eaten at all. Was it because you were feeling ill?

Also you said they had booked you a time for it to be removed the next day? So what's happened to that?

What did leaving accomplish?
You still have the abcess.
You now have to start again.
You can't go to work like this.
You have been told you are at risk of sepsis. Which can kill.

I think you have to assume you're not working tomorrow even if this is sorted out today. Get yourself back there now before this turns into sepsis.

I had sepsis last week from a gynae issue and was extremely ill. I was too busy to be in hospital too, I'm not sure there are many people who are delighted by a hospital stay and find it convenient. I spent 4 nights in there having had surgery and very hefty doses of IV antibiotics and am still quite ill.

Things in hospital can be slow but leaving will only have slowed things down further. Emergency surgery doesn't happen on your schedule, nor does being very ill as I have found out. Sometimes it just happens and you have to rearrange your life around it not the other way around. It sucked for me, my dh and my kids but I'm alive and we got through it.

I do understand how hospitals work I've been in them enough times, I know certain emergencies come before others it's not that that's the problem it's the so obvious lack of communication, the doctors and senior surgeons who have no idea who it is that deals with it. There was a lady across from me who was saying when she arrived it took 5 hours for the doctor to come see her, she asked for painkillers at 9pm and didn't get them while 6am, all the while the nurses are just sat at their station, same lady's been admitted to the ward yet her surgery hasn't even been scheduled yet she's now been in there 2 days so it doesn't give me a lot of hope or confidence in my local hospital trust

it's not fair on my children being dragged out at night time with my partner to drop stuff off at hospital for me, all turning up at hospital would have done is panicked my children wondering why mummy is in hospital and whether or not I'm coming home

You're being ridiculous.

Why would they wonder if you were coming home? Kids get the information YOU give them and it could have been easily explained to them without worrying them to death.

'Not fair on my children' is also ridiculous, it's a one off and your health needs are greater.

If the infection is spreading down your leg you're putting yourself at risk of sepsis, death or losing a limb.

It's terrifying just how quickly blood infections can spread - my dh went from having an infected cut on his finger to being admitted on intravenous ab's in the space of twelve hours. They told him if he'd gone to bed that night at home he may not have woken up. And he felt mainly fine in himself.

For goodness sake, get yourself back to hospital.

You are you going to work this week OP. They have told you that you need surgery.

I know you are worried about work , probably money too. However you need to put yourself first because ultimately they’ve highlighted the risk of sepsis.

Get back in and have it sorted, yes there will be a wait. They can observe your clinical signs and assess you - get you seen sooner if it gets worse.

Believe me they were not have admitted you if you didn’t need to be there.

Ring the hospital speak to the ward you were on and see if they want you back in as a walk in or via a and e

Sorry you’re feeling ill and in pain.

Unfortunately by leaving you are back to square 1. Especially as you’ll now miss being seen on the doctors morning round whether they will probably be able to tell you what the plan is. You’ll be put on the emergency list to have an abscess drained so you probably won’t be given a day and time as when it is done depends on other emergencies also waiting for surgery and anything life threatening will understandably jump the queue above your abscess.

You won’t be going to work tomorrow as your abscess will be drained under general anaesthetic and you won’t be able to drive/function properly for 24 hours after that. And that’s aside from whether or not you feel well enough and your pain has improved enough tomorrow. You need to focus on getting this treated and getting better and not worry about when you’re going to be home/back at work. The fact that you’re ill is out of your control and you will be back at home/work when you’re well enough and are able to be.

I also just wanted to add that the prodding and poking won’t have aggravated the abscess and made it double in size and start spreading down your leg, it’ll be the infection spreading which will do that. This makes it even more important that you go back to hospital and get this properly treated.

Hope you get this sorted, just go back, focus on getting better and leave your partner to worry about home and the children and forget about work until you’re well again. I hope you’re feeling better soon.

Was there nobody to bring you toiletries,food,drink,antibiotics?
To walk out when you had been warned it could be fatal was a very bad idea.
Now you have to return and be seen by staff as one of 'those' patients who walked off in a huff because service wasn't fast enough.
I can see your decision was made through exhaustion,pain,hunger and frustration but yes you were being very unreasonable.the NHS is struggling,you should have considered this.
Get yourself urgent help asap,take toiletries and meds and some books.
Good luck.

@Tataru I last ate on saturday at 4.30pm I fell asleep at 6pm and woke up at 8pm feeling really unwell very flu like, shivering, aching, headache, nausea etc, then I noticed the abscess, by Sunday morning the flu like symptoms just got worse as did the nausea so I didn't feel like eating, it wasn't until 6ish the nausea wore off and I started feeling hungry and by that point I was told nobody knew until the doctor had been whether I could eat or not, I still couldn't eat after I left hospital, when I got home I took an antibiotic and then realised I couldn't eat until 2 hours after the antibiotic which would have been nearly 11pm at night and by that point I'd fell asleep

Yabu. You should have gone to the nurse and said.
I know your busy but no one has completed my np assessment
I haven't had my anti biotics
I urgently need a drink or some iv fluids.
You sound young. How old are you

Slow fingers and I have cross posted with everyone.

One thing the Drs kept mentioning to me was how lucky I was that I went to a&e when I did. I wasn't sure going in, I felt unwell but even explaining to triage why I was there I felt like a fraud(I'm hot and feel tired and just not right) but a gut feeling told me it was serious and things did get very serious very fast even within a hour of being seen by triage I knew I made the right decision. Sepsis is quick, you have to be quicker.