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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not want child to travel in boot

209 replies

Mugglebuggle · 28/08/2021 20:01

Arranging to go for lunch/ dinner tomorrow, DH wants youngest DC to travel in the boot so we only need one car. Other option would be he, or another guest, drives a second car but would mean they cannot drink. We are going to country pub on B roads, approximately 15 - 20 minute drive. AIBU to be annoyed?

For further info, we both worked all through pandemic, booked 2 weeks annual leave and I caught covid at start, it's been pretty miserable & this would be first 'nice' social outing since and before we return to work next week bit I still don't think it's worth compromising safety.

OP posts:
Ponoka7 · 29/08/2021 11:16

If you were spotted by a passing Police car, you'd be charged and a referral go in to SS. We used to put my German Shepherd in the boot, so he could easily fit. It would make more sense for the eldest to go in the boot, which would be him.

Plumtree391 · 29/08/2021 11:17

Certainly no one should travel in the boot of a car. Surely there will be somebody in your party who doesn't want to drink and would be happy to drive.

Legoisaws8om · 29/08/2021 11:19

Sorry but how do you go out anywhere then with your kids if you do not have a car big enough? If your the driver I'd go with out the husband and tell him to find his own way there and back?

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 29/08/2021 11:30

I’ve worked all through the pandemic. What selfish reckless thing am I entitled to do to endanger my kids (who didn’t work at all)?

He is an idiot.

Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 11:33

We're a considerable distance to guests (in excess of 30 miles), who DH wanted to pick up, the venue is 15 minutes from them. They are elderly relatives on his side but do drive. The suggestion that they get a taxi from theirs is a sound one but I am still cross with DH and for some reason, he is pissed at me.

OP posts:
ojss21 · 29/08/2021 11:52

Confused by the non sequitur regarding working through the pandemic and getting Covid during your annual leave. For further info, I like chips and my favourite colour is orange...

Me too. I also worked through the pandemic and have had a fucking rough year. Should I also compromise my child's safety by shoving them in the boot? Ffs.

MumDadBingoBLUEY · 29/08/2021 11:56

Maybe DH could travel in the boot, if he thinks it's okay?

Bbq1 · 29/08/2021 12:22

Yes @Raggedyanabell Op just said that's what she meant upthread so yes, was deliberately misleading everyone. People obviously haven't read her update so are still commenting on how awful it is!

Tynesider007 · 29/08/2021 12:53

Could they not cling to the roof rack? Or strap them underneath to the exhaust?

Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 12:53

@Bbq1

Yes *@Raggedyanabell* Op just said that's what she meant upthread so yes, was deliberately misleading everyone. People obviously haven't read her update so are still commenting on how awful it is!
🙄Not misleading anyone, I really did mean he wanted to put DC in boot of estate car WITHOUT seat attachment!
OP posts:
LittleOwl153 · 29/08/2021 12:55

So you are DC are now not going - presumably he is now having to drive anyway then as you are not there to pick this up for him... how is he justifying that one then?

Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 12:56

@Excelthetube

I agree, I don’t understand why you don’t just get a minibus taxi if it’s only 15 mins away. That’s called a compromise/finding a solution
Thank you, it's a good suggestion but slightly patronising that you think you should need to define compromise to me🤣
OP posts:
Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 12:59

@LittleOwl153

So you are DC are now not going - presumably he is now having to drive anyway then as you are not there to pick this up for him... how is he justifying that one then?
He is! He still thinks IABU and only reached out to discuss a solution at 11th hour but too late for resolution at that point.
OP posts:
shouldistop · 29/08/2021 13:03

He's only annoyed at you because you've pointed out what an utter utter twat he is.

trevorandsimon · 29/08/2021 13:08

Why are you now not going? Surely the easiest solution is you meet the relatives there and they either drive themselves or get a taxi.

chocolateorangeinhaler · 29/08/2021 13:09

No no NO

Car design has changed since the 70s so a rear end shunt in them days would have likely just caused bumper damage maybe a few dents but serious injury to the drivers absorbing the energy of the crash.

Modern cars are now designed to crumple so people in the passenger areas don't absorb the energy. The crumple zone does. That's why car wrecks can look like a crushed coke can and people can walk out of them without a scratch.

Seriously, you don't want your child crushed like a coke can. It really isn't worth it just because one person can't pass up the opportunity to drink. Priorities!!

FinallyFluid · 29/08/2021 13:19

Jesus, before I opened this thread I thought you were referring to the suicide seat in the back of a wannabe people carrier.

Is he on glue ?

I would pay good money to hear him explain to his lunch companions why you are not there, always presuming he tells the truth.

Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 13:23

@trevorandsimon

Why are you now not going? Surely the easiest solution is you meet the relatives there and they either drive themselves or get a taxi.
It would be but he was being an arse & sulked all last night even though I offered options, then at last minute tried to resolve. I know I am being stubborn but he's pissed me off. I'll make it up to relatives & invite them here before DC go back to school.
OP posts:
Lweji · 29/08/2021 14:03

I'll make it up to relatives & invite them here before DC go back to school.

Why is it on you?

toomuchlaundry · 29/08/2021 14:06

I can’t believe he thought this was a serious solution

Jaxhog · 29/08/2021 14:08

I guess you could suggest he goes the whole hog i.e. gag the child with duck tape and bind his hands and feet with cable ties, before throwing him into the boot. Then you could call the police and get them to explain to your DH how foolish this idea is!

Seriously though, he can't really mean this surely? If he does, suggest he goes in the boot instead.

Lweji · 29/08/2021 14:10

I'd worry that he routinely puts the children in danger.
If he continues to sulk it might be worth telling him that you'd consider it grounds for divorce and to request supervised access, should he ever do what he suggested to the child.

timeisnotaline · 29/08/2021 14:22

Why do you have to make it up to anyone? Let the arsey man who wanted to risk his dcs lives for a drink of alcohol do any making up.

VickyEadieofThigh · 29/08/2021 14:30

@Debetswell

Good god. I put my dog in the boot using a clip to restrain her and I still worry about someone going into the back of us. I can't imagine putting a dc in the boot. It's dangerous and illegal!
Me too!
Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 15:11

He's just sent an apology. I think he knew he was being a dick earlier but wouldn't admit it. We live to fight another day!

OP posts: