Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not want child to travel in boot

209 replies

Mugglebuggle · 28/08/2021 20:01

Arranging to go for lunch/ dinner tomorrow, DH wants youngest DC to travel in the boot so we only need one car. Other option would be he, or another guest, drives a second car but would mean they cannot drink. We are going to country pub on B roads, approximately 15 - 20 minute drive. AIBU to be annoyed?

For further info, we both worked all through pandemic, booked 2 weeks annual leave and I caught covid at start, it's been pretty miserable & this would be first 'nice' social outing since and before we return to work next week bit I still don't think it's worth compromising safety.

OP posts:
NeverRTFT · 29/08/2021 06:01

@TheVolturi

My parents used to make me travel in the back of a van, but that was the 80s, no idea if it was normal then, but we used to go on holiday and me and my sister would be in the back of the van on cushions. I would not allow my child to travel like this!
Same. For up to 4 hours if going on a trip. Grim. Also did boot of car to/from country pub on many occasions. And likewise, also would not let DC travel like this.

If it's a 30 min ride away just get taxi, then everyone can drink who wants to and BONUS you all get home in one piece

peachykeenjellybaby · 29/08/2021 07:07

Also travelled in the back of a van. All the time!

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 29/08/2021 07:15

Absolutely not. I have been known (in an emergency) to squash 4 kids along the back seat (3 seats) to travel a couple of miles to school. But not 20-30 minutes rolling round in the boot.

Now don’t get me wrong-I don’t advocate 4 kids across the back seat either-I’m aware it’s not safe and seatbelt sharing doesn’t work but I was in a bit of a pickle.

Incidentally I know a man who broke his back in an accident because he was riding in the boot.

mogsrus · 29/08/2021 07:19

so your car suddenly stops,& for whatever reason a car behind crashes into you,this scenario could realistically happen,& apparently you haven't given this a thought? your car is uninsured, stupid

Looubylou · 29/08/2021 07:25

I am aware of an ex doing this to a child, last year. Child was old enough to report to mum. It still happens.

MrsScrubbithatescleaning · 29/08/2021 07:26

Law covering wearing Seatbelts.

I’ve just looked it up and drivers and front seat passengers were required to wear a seatbelt by law in January 1983. It wasn’t until 1991, that rear seat passengers had to wear seatbelts too.

I was a kid in the 70’s and I remember my dad refused to wear a seatbelt for years after it became law. He also used to drink pints with whisky chasers at the pub and then drive us all home afterwards! At least I wasn’t required to sit in the boot, so I guess I was luckier than OP’s kids.Hmm

ShingleBeach · 29/08/2021 08:43

Well.

In the village where I grew up I see cars driving down to the quay / beach all the time with kids lined up in the boot of a Berlingo or Renault Kangaroo or similar, all doors open, legs hanging out the back.

But no way would I allow this.

Op: can you book a big people carrier taxi for all of you? It’s a big treat occasion.

maddening · 29/08/2021 09:12

Yanbu, drinking is not worth risking dcs life for.

They could decide it is worth paying for a taxi in order to drink, that is a rational, safe and legal option.

Raggedyanabell · 29/08/2021 10:28

@a8mint

Do you mean those backward facing sears in the boot of an estate car
If that is what OP meant then this thread was so misleading!
timeisnotaline · 29/08/2021 10:37

Has no one asked how you don’t have a car that fits your family?? I get a second car can be too small for the whole family but who actually doesn’t have any car that fits their children in it?

NerrSnerr · 29/08/2021 10:38

@timeisnotaline

Has no one asked how you don’t have a car that fits your family?? I get a second car can be too small for the whole family but who actually doesn’t have any car that fits their children in it?
It says in the OP they have guests so it's more than just their family.
BogRollBOGOF · 29/08/2021 11:01

I used to end up in the boot through the 80s and into the early 90s, but the difference in safety between the boot and a backseat that didn't have seatbelts anyway was less stark than it is today with compulsory seat belts, a wider range of car seats through childhood and better designed cars.

I last travelled in the boot about a decade ago in Tibet. Perfectly legal there and tourist permits are thin ground so kicking up a fuss about being overbooked on a tour jeep with no accommodation/ ongoing travel would have led to very difficult circumstances in itself. It was better hoping that we weren't going to fatally plunge off sheer drops that rather negated the seatbelt discussion anyway.

But free-range in the boot in the UK in 2021? No way. Especially not pre-planned in easily avoidable circumstances.

timeisnotaline · 29/08/2021 11:03

Thanks @NerrSnerr . Stiff cheddar, someone else will have to drive as well as the op. She can say so sorry you can’t all drink.

Lweji · 29/08/2021 11:07

Do you have guests staying?
Is this a new situation? Why doesn't the whole family fit one car?

But an extra adult not drinking is well worth a child's safety.
Or DH could travel in the boot. Wink

Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 11:08

It may have been wishy washy but you're wrong, I wasn't seeking validation for DH's plan, quite the opposite as we had argued, I wondered if anyone would possibly think IABU when presented with this.

OP posts:
Excelthetube · 29/08/2021 11:08

Pretty sure we did this as kids.

Original poster
Mugglebuggle · 29/08/2021 11:11

By way of update, DH and I are not speaking as unbelievably, he thinks IABU and he is going to said dinner alone.

OP posts:
SquirryTheSquirrel · 29/08/2021 11:12

Has your husband just arrived from 1978?

MrsBobDylan · 29/08/2021 11:12

Obviously if you've had a rough couple of weeks, slinging the kids in the boot is fine.

Also, if you do decide to take another car, then as long as he can stand up at the end of the meal, why not drink as well?

TheWoleb · 29/08/2021 11:13

Why cant you take a taxi?

MrsBobDylan · 29/08/2021 11:14

Just seen your update. I'm sorry to break it to you, but you have married a twat. Fingers crossed the kids don't take after him.

Excelthetube · 29/08/2021 11:14

I agree, I don’t understand why you don’t just get a minibus taxi if it’s only 15 mins away.
That’s called a compromise/finding a solution

PrivateHall · 29/08/2021 11:14

Ah op I really feel for you. I would be very upset too in your shoes. He is being absolutely ridiculous (and presumably still cannot drink, as will have to drive? Or will he drink and drive??).

Enjoy a few hours peace without the plonker around.

LaPampa · 29/08/2021 11:15

How is he going to get there if he goes alone?

Newmama93 · 29/08/2021 11:16

Oh my god! I’m shocked! My DH would never even think to compromise our child’s safety, your DH sounds extremely selfish. I’d be very concerned. Good luck to you, you and definitely
Not being unreasonable and 99.9999999% of mothers would be horrified at the thought of travelling with their child in the boot