AIBU to tell you that my husband is a twat?

[PackedUp2]

Just need to rant sorry!

My husband treats me like a maid there to service him and his needs and I am SICK OF IT.

Tonight's argument - I have asked him so many times to please clear his pockets before he puts things in the washing basket because I don't always have time to go through everything (on maternity with our baby and I'm knackered!). Anyway lo and behold he didn't again and his car key was put through the washing machine 🤷‍♀️ lots of blame on me of course, "is it really so hard to check his pockets for him" etc... Then lots of adamant "you're buying me a new one, you're sorting this out", "where are your keys I'm going to go run them under the tap" etc...

This is just one thing but it's just been the straw that broke the camel's back. I've packed up me and baby whilst he was in the shower and I'm at my mum's house who's on holiday.

I wouldn't even mind if he was like "my keys broken now but I know you told me to check pockets so I'm sorry I forgot" I'd have probably then apologised for not checking as well. But it's the total unwillingness to accept ANY blame. It's all my fault and now I'm apparently definitely paying for a new one for him or he'll wash my car keys as well (his wife on maternity getting next to no money).

I'm sat in my mum's empty house with a crying 6 month old. Happy Friday to me.

I agree. He’s a twat.

Massive twat

Wow, he sounds like a charmer…..

Does he have any redeeming qualities?

Well done, you made an excellent decision. You only have one baby to worry about now- the one you gave birth to.

He’s an arsehole. (Not your DC, in case that wasn’t obvious!)

Goodness how awful.
When's your mum back?
How long are you planning on staying?
Is there food etc there?

He's a twat faced dick head

Not your responsibility at all to check pockets of clothes that are in the washing basket.

You are doing the right thing to leave the bastard and don't let him hoover you back in.

Post on relationship board and get some good advice there.

I would leave someone who threatened to damage my car key in retaliation. What a nasty piece of shit.

Parenting is hard, relationships are hard, I would probably forgive petty shit blaming you for not looking (not that you should) in heat of the moment frustration or new parent tiredness.

But that’s quite a nasty threat, isn’t it?

I’d stay put at your mum’s until you’ve had a chance to talk through everything about how he treats you, with a trusted person.

If he’s an arsehole and today is the day you took your stand, then actually yes - in a way, it is happy Friday

I'm sorry OP . He sounds like an unutterable bell-end. I don't even know you but I can guarantee you're worth far more and deserve far better.

He needs to grow up and accept some responsibility for his own actions.
Is there anyone who can come keep you company in your mum's house? Sister? Local friend?

Very twatty behaviour and disturbing that he’s threatened to damage things of yours. I can see tempers may run high with the stress of a new baby but he’s crossed a line. Time to re-set some boundaries. Hopefully he’ll wake up a bit knowing you are prepared to walk out.

Massive twat. You deserve better op.

Will your mom let you stay?

Do you have your own money etc?

Well, after those threats and criticisms, I wouldn't be washing any of his clothes again... far too risky. One problem in your life solved and one less task on the list.

Perhaps you could go further. Are you sure that he is a valuable part of your life? He sounds weak and childish (in a bad way).

Him threatening to ruin your keys makes this a case of he's gone too fair.
Obviously the other stuff he said was horrible.
Stay at your mums. Order takeaway. Wait until he contacts you with an apology. Stay there until it comes. If it doesn't come then this is your life now. If it does come firm words need to be had.

Wow. What makes him think you're his skivvy?

Well, after those threats and criticisms, I wouldn't be washing any of his clothes again... far too risky

I may have pulled all his freshly washed clothes out of the dryer and put them in the dog bed when I left as well

Let him wash his own stuff from now on!

@Theunamedcat

Will your mom let you stay?

Do you have your own money etc?

I haven't actually told her we are here (I have a key) as I don't want to put a downer on her holiday but she 100% wouldn't mind us being here.

Luckily DS has a lot of stuff here already like cot, highchair, toys etc...

What a knob....

Either consider making a future without him if he is unlikely to change his behaviour towards you XXX

Good luck you don't need to be his mother or his maid😘

How can he make you pay?

Yeah. He's doing his own washing from now on.

Life’s to short for a relationship like that. It’s just miserable.

@AnonymousCheerleader

How can he make you pay?

No idea. I'm guessing he thought if he just kept repeating that then I'd do it 🤷‍♀️