You're child free and staying overnight with friends who have young children, what time do you get up?

[Grundoncalling]

A friend stayed over last night and is still in bed with no sign of stirring. A different child-free friend who stayed with us slept until 10.30.

We're unfortunately up at 6am and would usually have eaten breakfast by 8 and be thinking about what to do with our Sunday now.

I'm probably being precious, genuinely wondering if this is poor form? Pre-kid we'd set an alarm for 8 and definitely be up by 9 if staying with friends with young children.

"Whenever we've hosted/visited we have always started the day by sharing breakfast, and I wouldn't want anyone to have to prep something for two or three 'sittings'. "

How complicated is breakfast at your place? People who have a lie-in quite often don't need/want breakfast anyway.

"And if my friends with kids did want or need me to be up at a certain time I would completely respect that and adhere to it. But I'm not a mind reader."

Me too, but if I was a bit sleep deprived, I'd want to know before the visit as I may cancel. Having to get up early doesn't really feel like a day off.

Don't people have anything they want/need to do in that time?
Not in someone else's house, no.

Shallwegoforawalk
Should think so yep

I get bored just lying in bed doing nothing at all, and i suppose I wouldn't travel to visit friends just to sit in their house awake, but doing nothing/ reading a book alone for hours. Why bother visiting a friend to do that? If I wanted to read a book alone i would get up and go home to do it, thus leaving the friend free to get on with their day rather than have them sitting in waiting to see what time I planned to get up.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

Shallwegoforawalk Should think so yep

I get bored just lying in bed doing nothing at all, and i suppose I wouldn't travel to visit friends just to sit in their house awake, but doing nothing/ reading a book alone for hours. Why bother visiting a friend to do that? If I wanted to read a book alone i would get up and go home to do it, thus leaving the friend free to get on with their day rather than have them sitting in waiting to see what time I planned to get up.

I'll see my friends when I wake up

@Gwenhwyfar

"Whenever we've hosted/visited we have always started the day by sharing breakfast, and I wouldn't want anyone to have to prep something for two or three 'sittings'. "

How complicated is breakfast at your place? People who have a lie-in quite often don't need/want breakfast anyway.

I was thinking the same. Unless the OP is producing a hotel-style full English and continental buffet every Sunday, talk of ‘sittings’ seems a bit much. How hard is it to bung a couple of extra slices of Hovis in the toaster?

We are in our 20s, most of our friends are childless and either still studying or living with parents in their first grad job. We don't expect to see them until lunchtime. We just make sure to tell them the night before that we'll be heading out in the morning by 9am, and they're welcome to join us or keep sleeping and can help themselves to food etc, and we'll be back at midday for DS's nap and to make us all a nice lunch.

I'm child free in my late 30s. If I was staying with a friend I'd say when I went to bed "what's the plan for tomorow' and they'd either say "oh lazy day get up when you want" or "we'll be having breakfast at 8, join us"

Its madness to have expectations but kit communicate them!

Not all kids get up early. I never did as a child (and still don't)
I do try and be up and ready by 10ish in other people's houses though (earlier if they prefer or if we have plans).
I don't eat breakfast anyway so don't really get the whole thing about 'sitting' for breakfast. A coffee and I'm good.

My toddler wakes between 8.30-9 and the baby usually later, no way am I getting up earlier without reason!
I wouldn't expect a child free adult to wake early because I have kids, though. If we wanted to be out early I'd tell them, so they had the option of setting an alarm or passing on whatever we were doing.

I don't understand why those with children care if a friend sleeps in? Is it jealousy? How does that affect your routine if the person is asleep?!! I'm baffled lol

No not jealously just inconvenience mainly. For example with my childfree friend who stayed in bed until after 11am, it meant she wouldn't be ready to go anywhere until 12ish by which stage it was my DCs nap time - which could be another two hours! So we wouldn't be able to go anywhere until after 2pm. I could have let the babies sleep in the car but then it would be a very short nap and I'd have to wrangle VERY cranky children for the rest of the day and it would be a pain (my youngest in particular was a tyrant if she didn't get enough sleep). Of course if you don't have DC you won't think of these things - I wouldn't have either - so it wasn't my friends fault I should have made rough plans the night before. I had forgotten how late it's possible to sleep pre-DC and took for granted that she'd be up, especially with the noise of young DC.

I didn't want to leave my friend in bed either and head out with the DC in the morning as she doesn't drive and we live literally in the middle of nowhere so if she woke up she would have had nothing to do except look out at the fields!

youvegottenminuteslynn I agree to a certain extent. I think people forget that the reason lots of other people aren’t sleep deprived is because they catch-up at weekends. I used to.

I disagree with this but though ‘I often feel that the tiring and tough elements of people's lives who don't have children yet are minimised and sort of dismissed.’

This is probably because people with children are doing those bits of tiring life as well as dealing with children and have no choice but to crack on. I’d love to have some weekend lie-ins again.

@Bunnycat101

youvegottenminuteslynn I agree to a certain extent. I think people forget that the reason lots of other people aren’t sleep deprived is because they catch-up at weekends. I used to.

I disagree with this but though ‘I often feel that the tiring and tough elements of people's lives who don't have children yet are minimised and sort of dismissed.’

This is probably because people with children are doing those bits of tiring life as well as dealing with children and have no choice but to crack on. I’d love to have some weekend lie-ins again.

So as usual, people with children want a bun.

If I was staying with a friend I'd say when I went to bed "what's the plan for tomorow' and they'd either say "oh lazy day get up when you want" or "we'll be having breakfast at 8, join us"
Exactly. Just let them know.
I'd have no problem with guests sleeping late.
It'd be good for me I like peace for at least 3 cups of tea before I see anyone but immediate family.
I'd leave a note with directions to the fridge if I needed to head out early with the DC.

We're unfortunately up at 6am and would usually have eaten breakfast by 8 and be thinking about what to do with our Sunday now
Awh you really shouldn't invite friends with strict restrictions.
Before DC working FT with a social life and friendships Sunday morning was the only morning to recharge before starting the manic rat race week ahead.