So he washed the sheets

[Wowhewashedthesheets]

and he cleaned the front door, and hoovered, and took the meter readings, and sorted the bin. He told me all this after I’d gone to the dentist in a strop because I was pissed off about something completely different and unrelated. I’ve just told him I have put loo rolls in his bathroom. He gave me an odd look, so I said well you told me you’d hoovered.

I’ve a good mind to keep this up right back at him so tonight it will be
“I’ve cooked you dinner” instead of “dinner is ready”
Tomorrow it will be “I’ve ordered , x y z on the online shopping for you” instead of it just appearing where he wants it.

I know I am not the only one who lives with this but today it’s really really annoyed me and I feel the need to say it somewhere.

Happy Friday everyone.

@MakeMathsFun when a pp stated how the bar for men is so very low, you didn't really need to come on and confirm that, with At least you have a DH who takes on these responsibilities because that is the whole point of the bar being low comment! At least! Why at least?!?!!’ Why is your other adult in the house not expected to act like the second adult?

@reesewithoutaspoon

My dad used to do the I,ve done x,y,z FOR YOU to my mother. It ended the day he told her "I,ve done YOUR dishes for you" She took the stack of plates and proceeded to frisbee them against a wall. Dad all alarmed goes. "What are you doing stop breaking the plates " and she replied. "well you said they were MY plates so I,ll do what I want with them"

Awesome 🤣

My partner and I always tell each other when we've done a job and always get/give a well done or thanks in reply, I think its nice!
You get acknowledgement and gratitude and also helps us to keep our 50-50 balance of jobs.
Like if he said 'I took the bins out, I'd say oh well done for remembering, I'll do the dishwasher'.
I don't think it's a bad thing at all!

My DH always has to tell me everything he's done and then when I say well I've done x,y, z he will say it's not a competition
Hahaha

@Cannes12

My partner and I always tell each other when we've done a job and always get/give a well done or thanks in reply, I think its nice! You get acknowledgement and gratitude and also helps us to keep our 50-50 balance of jobs. Like if he said 'I took the bins out, I'd say oh well done for remembering, I'll do the dishwasher'. I don't think it's a bad thing at all!

I get that it’s nice, but we have a family of 5 plus dog and are basically doing chores all the time… either cooking, cleaning the kitchen after cooking, putting washing in, putting washing away, doing the dishwasher, hoovering etc. We would be telling people what we’d done and thanking each other for it all day! Our dishwasher is on 2-3 times a day in the holidays for example.

[quote JulesCobb]**@MakeMathsFun* when a pp stated how the bar for men is so very low, you didn't really need to come on and confirm that, with At least you have a DH who takes on these responsibilities* because that is the whole point of the bar being low comment! At least! Why at least?!?!!’ Why is your other adult in the house not expected to act like the second adult?[/quote]
"At least" was meant to be in comparison with other men who don't contribute. (but probably not written in the right syntax). Maybe both adults do have to act the same in communicating too. Perhaps if the wife 'manounced' too, he might be more aware of the magnitude of work done. Personally I think that telling your partner what you have done is ok, but not if he/she makes it out to be a special event or seeking praise. Nonetheless I certainly do see why it can be annoying. In this context however, my point was that it seemed to be in response to a "strop", which might suggest that the 'manouncement' was intended to help alleviate the stress. Instead it had the opposite effect and the poor man was probably left confused. As far as he is concerned, he took positive action and communicated it to try to show empathy. Then in return he got a mocking "I've put loo rolls in the bathroom". As a result, he might now think, "what's the point of trying if all I get is a sarcastic reaction?" and therefore he might do nothing in future. For him its a lose-lose situation, and for her he's an annoying unsympathetic manouncer!
I think that once emotions have calmed down, they need to have a polite chat about it - or else he will never know why... and will continue to manounce indefinitely. A little communication seems to be the solution to his over-communication I think.

I cook tea and ask 'how is it?' - I get 'fine' as an answer.

When DH cooks tea (he does his share to be fair) it has be praised in detail - 'you executed the spinach perfectly...' level of praise. Hmmm.

vm.tiktok.com/ZMRUx2GDq/