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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Does this happen to other people?

256 replies

Youn · 19/08/2021 20:23

Name changed but long time poster.

I often get woken up DH, DC or occasionally DB screaming over me or crying because of their perceived emergency.

I have PTSD from my own medical emergency and severe anxiety as a result of the after effects but when my family wake me up like this, I genuinely have a panic attack and freak out. No one understands how fragile I feel and how utterly cruel it is to be woken up like this.

I’ve tried explaining to my DH and my DC (preteens) but it happened again today and I just feel like maybe I’m not for this world...

I feel like my family lack compassion and kindness and don’t realize what a big issue this has become for me.

Their perceived emergencies are small logistical misunderstandings quickly corrected like arriving early for something and thinking I have given them the wrong time. Husband venting about something happening at work. Or anything from weather change. Except when I wake up to someone screaming or crying over me I immediately think someone has died or been injured and my body experiences immediate trauma response and then once I realize it’s “nothing” I’m angry and exhausted.

I’ve never done this to them. But this is something that happened a lot to me when I was growing up. I hate it. I think it’s cruel.

Aibu? Is this “normal”?

Often it’s when I’m having my own health issue when this happens and I’m sleeping off a severe headache.

OP posts:
Youn · 20/08/2021 09:19

I feel that being on my own to heal in peace would be beneficial for me but detrimental to my family. I don’t know how my husband would take this request. My children would be affected too.

I really don’t think anyone knows the dark place I’m in, even though I try to communicate and speak to them. After everything that happened last night, I couldn’t sleep, was up most of the night but fell asleep after 3am. This morning I get woken up (accidentally) it’s ok, it was not an ambush but immediately when he knows I’m awake, my son is in high volume mode singing loudly. This didn’t startle me or frighten me but it’s just indicative of no consideration, empathy or respect towards me.

OP posts:
Chickychickydodah · 20/08/2021 09:20

Put a lock on your door. Tell them that it is unacceptable and not to do it, if your dh does it again tell him he’s in the spare room.

Youn · 20/08/2021 09:21

My DH did make us all breakfast which I thought was thoughtful and kind.

OP posts:
diddl · 20/08/2021 09:27

How would it be detrimental to your family-knowing that you would be getting better more quickly?

As long as you kept in touch-on your terms!

Your husband would just have to deal with it!

Years ago one of my parents was ill & I just took off for 2wks at short notice.

The kids were both younger than 12 & my husband had to adjust.

His work were accomodating which obviously helped, but I expected to be able to go & him sort things out whilst I was away.

You have been/are ill & need to rest.

The family need to adjust & if they can't you need to take yourself away imo.

They aren't thinking of you-so make sure that you do!

lottiegarbanzo · 20/08/2021 10:06

Are you a 'trailing spouse', moving around the world as a SAHM, while your DH does a 'big job'? Is he used to being free to work long hours, while you deal with all the domestic and child-related stuff?

That could explain but not excuse his domestic incompetence and shock at having to deal with mundane household stuff himself.

The DCs behaviour sounds like that of a toddler with a SAHM. Takes mum for granted, always delighted when Daddy comes home. He gets to be the fun one, while she does all the boring, bossy, organising stuff and is resented for doing it.

Teenagers can be selfish arseholes and often try to push their unreasonable behaviour as far as they can, to see what they can get away with. Parents need to present a united front. Also to remember that teens actually crave boundaries, to keep them feeling safe. Being allowed to get away with things they didn't think they'd be able to, that they were just trying on, can make them feel unsafe, scared and out of control.

The teens (and DH) need to be trained to function as a family, not as a collection of individuals orbiting one sun (you), pronto.

An old-fashioned paper family calendar could help. The kind with a column for each person. They are each responsible for writing their own stuff onto the calendar (you could prompt but not do it for them) - so spotting any clashes and talking to the person concerned. No-one is above writing on the calendar. You cannot have one person (your DH) using it as a reference document, while failing to add his own events. The assumption has to be that (outside standard work or school hours) if someone has not added an event to the calendar, that person is available; either at home, or out doing something casual that can easily be interrupted or re-scheduled.

You could even schedule naps, if that could work for you? Or just schedule 'afternoons off' when you're not available to anyone, so could nap, could go for a walk, meet a friend, whatever.

You might prefer to keep the calendar for the kids only, so that you don't present a false idea of equality within the household, of them being able to 'trump' your necessary activities with non-essential ones of their own. There is an amount of co-operation and mutual respect required to make this work really well. It could be a useful first step though.

The sports event incident is sooo weird. How is it possible that, at 3.45pm there weren't people setting up, other people arriving? Why couldn't your DS or DH ask anyone there what was happening? It really sounds as though they deliberately chose to come home and scream at you as a punishment for 'letting them down' by not checking, correcting and coddling them. Really nasty behaviour.

But, if your DS had had responsibility for writing his own event on the calendar, no voice notes from mummy, he'd have had to check he had the time right to start with, then written it down, then had it there to refer to on the day. If he hadn't, well that's his screw up and he deals with the consequences.

lottiegarbanzo · 20/08/2021 10:07

And yes, they don't understand your condition and may never understand it. They don't need to understand, they just need to be told what is happening to help you recover and to respect that.

EllieQ · 20/08/2021 10:10

@honeylulu

This sounds torturous! I think there are two things at work here, actually three but two are connected.

Firstly your husband is a total drama queen and your sons either take after him genetically or have learned to copy him.

Secondly, and i think this is sadly true of many households, that there is a feeling (often subconscious) that the woman/mother should be permanently at the disposal/ in servitude to the rest of the family. I get this a bit I.e. when my husband is having a nap or reading the paper he gets left in peace. If I go for a laydown or sit and read my book within minutes everyone seems to come to find me and ask what I'm doing as if they are affronted about it. I do pull them up on this sharply each time but it's worrying that I have to.

Thirdly (and connected to the second) there may be some buried resentment about your illness and need to rest having taken you "out of service". Does that ring true?

What to do about it though, I don't know. I would want to live somewhere else on my own! But that is very extreme and far from ideal. Is family therapy/ counselling an option?

I agree with all this. I noticed that even though you’re ill/ recovering, you’re still the one confirming details of the event, which suggests you’re the one who found out about it/ suggested it as an activity etc. And your husband and son expect you to solve all their problems, so when they arrived early and the venue was closed, they ran home screaming and panicking to you instead of checking the message you left or checking details of the event online (assuming they have smartphones). I’d lose all respect for my DH if he didn’t even try to solve an problem himself first.
topcat2014 · 20/08/2021 10:13

Are you asleep in the day? Do you work shifts?

Because, apart from young kids, I just can't get the context of how this arises.

Youn · 20/08/2021 10:13

The needed to meet their coach for 4pm with other participants and leave in convoy to make the tournament on time. So at 3:45pm no one was waiting at the designated spot. However when they got back there at 4pm, after waking me up screaming and crying, the coach and other participants had arrived, so they all left together on time.

OP posts:
Lottie2shoes · 20/08/2021 10:14

Ok OP, this is starting to sound more and more bizarre, no offence.
How long have you been ill?
How long have you had PTSD?
Have they always woken you up screaming and crying?
How long have you had earplugs in while sleeping?
If they have always woken you up screaming and crying, how were you when you were better?
Have you always slept during the day even when you were better?
Do they wake you up like this during the night?
How often are they waking you up?
How long and how often do you sleep during the day?

boogiewithasuitcase · 20/08/2021 10:19

This sounds horrendous and exhausting. Your family ought to start taking more responsibility for themselves, and your DH should be supporting you more and accept that life will be a 'downer' at times, especially as you are recovering from illness. I like the calendar idea suggested by a PP.

diddl · 20/08/2021 10:21

@topcat2014

Are you asleep in the day? Do you work shifts?

Because, apart from young kids, I just can't get the context of how this arises.

Read the Op's posts then!
diddl · 20/08/2021 10:22

@Youn

My DH did make us all breakfast which I thought was thoughtful and kind.
I think you have very low expectations tbh.
TwoMuchTwoYoung · 20/08/2021 10:26

People are repeatedly suggesting a lock on the door.
Will you be able to do this?

Youn · 20/08/2021 10:26

@Lottie2shoes

Ok OP, this is starting to sound more and more bizarre, no offence. How long have you been ill? How long have you had PTSD? Have they always woken you up screaming and crying? How long have you had earplugs in while sleeping? If they have always woken you up screaming and crying, how were you when you were better? Have you always slept during the day even when you were better? Do they wake you up like this during the night? How often are they waking you up? How long and how often do you sleep during the day?
It’s been 3.5 years of recurring meningitis, often hospitalized for it. I’ve had PTSD for this period but it’s much worse since June, when I was recovering from another meningitis infection and was making my way back to the UAE and had to spend 2 weeks in quarantine- only to be attacked and sexually assaulted by a staff member at the hotel where I was staying. In the past week they’ve woken me up twice like this. Before that a few months ago. I’ve slept with earplugs for years. DH snores and it keeps me up. Now I can’t sleep without earplugs. It’s mainly when I’m sick that they wake me up screaming or crying. It’s happened with phone calls coming into the hospital while I’ve been in agony with meningitis. Prior to getting meningitis I’d not sleep during the day. This week has been a hard week so I tried to nap for part of 3 afternoons this week. No they don’t wake me up in the middle of the night (like this).
OP posts:
Youn · 20/08/2021 10:28

Yes, the lock is do able.
I have thoughts they might just stand banging at the door which would send me over.
Calendar idea great.
Thanks for these suggestions- I’ll do this.

OP posts:
lottiegarbanzo · 20/08/2021 10:38

I think they're terrified of losing you, recognise that they can't cope without you but are being arseholes about it.

A lock might help but what I think will happen is they'll shake and rattle the door to see if it's locked, so waking you up. Or talk loudly outside your room about whether or not they should disturb you, so waking you up.

The only thing that's going to make a difference is your DH leading by example and enforcing considerate behaviour with your DCs.

TimeForTeaAndG · 20/08/2021 10:38

He called you like this while you were in hospital?! So...he stayed calm enough to call the hospital, ask to be out through to you THEN started shouting and crying?! Sorry, he is actually an arsehole and needs to go.

JellyRobin · 20/08/2021 10:52

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

JonahofArk · 20/08/2021 10:53

I find it astounding that some posters are basically advising the OP to find ways to facilitate her family's abusive behaviour. Her family are being abusive, and no amount of calendars or locks are going to change that.

You are being treated like a second class citizen, being blamed for everything and being made responsible for anything that goes wrong. They are shouting at you when you are crying. Your husband uses other people to abuse you when you try and put boundaries (such as putting your phone on silent) in place. You have clearly had a number of very serious health issues and they couldn't care less about your need to recover.

I would go apeshit here OP. Tell them this is abusive behaviour. Start doing it back to them. Wake them up at 3am screaming and shouting. Repeatedly. Shout back. Take a complete step back from organising anything-if they are so convinced that everything you do is wrong then surely they don't want you making arrangements for things anyway? Don't allow them to make you a scapegoat for anything.

Whatever you do, do not take on more responsibilities and put yourself under more pressure to facilitate the lives of people who are being abusive towards you. That is terrible advice as far as I'm concerned.

lottiegarbanzo · 20/08/2021 11:02

Yeah, you may be well right about their motivation and the nature of their behaviour JonahofArk but 'shout back, then leave' advice is always so easy to give, so hard to act upon.

Using tools like locks and calendars to facilitate their independence, giving them the tools to take responsibility for themselves, is a one-step-at-a-time approach towards the same end.

OP gaining enough time and free mental space to start recovering is what she needs right now, so that she then becomes well enough to consider her next steps and have a chance of being able to act upon them.

Expecting a very ill woman to turn into a warrior goddess overnight is madly unrealistic.

JonahofArk · 20/08/2021 11:15

@lottiegarbanzo I don't think anybody should attempt to negotiate with their abuser(s). That's a red line for me. And the OP has clearly tried to make those step-by-step changes before (including voice notes etc) and they haven't worked, so I don't think she should shoulder the burden of responsibility here.

How can you negotiate with some who claims to hear 3.45pm on a voice note when the OP says 4pm? How do you negotiate with someone who can I assume normally and calmly contact a hospital, ask to be put through to his wife, and THEN start screaming and shouting in agitation? They know exactly what they are doing, and show no willingness to change.

JonahofArk · 20/08/2021 11:18

@lottiegarbanzo oh and should the OP need to facilitate her husband's independence? Really?

newplanneeded · 20/08/2021 11:23

I find it astounding that some posters are basically advising the OP to find ways to facilitate her family's abusive behaviour. Her family are being abusive, and no amount of calendars or locks are going to change that.

You are being treated like a second class citizen, being blamed for everything and being made responsible for anything that goes wrong. They are shouting at you when you are crying. Your husband uses other people to abuse you when you try and put boundaries (such as putting your phone on silent) in place. You have clearly had a number of very serious health issues and they couldn't care less about your need to recover.

^
This exactly.

You are being abused.

Did you ever think about leaving?
How can you expect your body to heal from such a serious illness with all the abuse and gaslighting towards you?

tropicalwaterdiver · 20/08/2021 11:29

OP, to be fair they couid not know if you were asleep or not when they called to the hospital.
It seems like extreme emotional reactions from your husband and kids if they cry due to sport event time confusion.
Meningitis makes people sensitive to sound and light and might be a reason that sounds and noises are difficult for you to handle. You need to find a way to move to a quiet place for healing and seriously address your recurring meningitis.