Does this happen to other people?

[Youn]

Name changed but long time poster.

I often get woken up DH, DC or occasionally DB screaming over me or crying because of their perceived emergency.

I have PTSD from my own medical emergency and severe anxiety as a result of the after effects but when my family wake me up like this, I genuinely have a panic attack and freak out. No one understands how fragile I feel and how utterly cruel it is to be woken up like this.

I’ve tried explaining to my DH and my DC (preteens) but it happened again today and I just feel like maybe I’m not for this world...

I feel like my family lack compassion and kindness and don’t realize what a big issue this has become for me.

Their perceived emergencies are small logistical misunderstandings quickly corrected like arriving early for something and thinking I have given them the wrong time. Husband venting about something happening at work. Or anything from weather change. Except when I wake up to someone screaming or crying over me I immediately think someone has died or been injured and my body experiences immediate trauma response and then once I realize it’s “nothing” I’m angry and exhausted.

I’ve never done this to them. But this is something that happened a lot to me when I was growing up. I hate it. I think it’s cruel.

Aibu? Is this “normal”?

Often it’s when I’m having my own health issue when this happens and I’m sleeping off a severe headache.

OP going away for a few days sounds very sensible and achievable. I hope you have a good rest and keep your eyes fixed on doing it. It’s likely there’ll be more dramas - that happen consciously or unconsciously - if they know too far in advance. Just do it with a day or less notice to them.
They’ll find new independence and confidence too, which you don’t want to deny them the experience of, it’s not good for anyone and leaves you trapped as the ‘ill’ person.

This is really odd.

Are you sleeping a lot? Are they perhaps struggling with your absence and getting frustrated by your need to nap during the day?

A cousin's DH went through a phase of sleeping a lot during the day. He would vacate himself from the family basically whenever there were things he didnt want to do, saying he felt ill or tired. It was terrifically frustrating for my cousin who was left to do everything - deal with the kids, sort the house, cook the meals. With hindsight, he was possibly depressed, but nonetheless his behaviour was selfish, and he took a while to recognise the impact on his family.

Your situation is rather different with your recurring illness but regardless I can imagine perhaps your DH has been under considerable strain and is struggling?

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

This is really odd.

Are you sleeping a lot? Are they perhaps struggling with your absence and getting frustrated by your need to nap during the day?

A cousin's DH went through a phase of sleeping a lot during the day. He would vacate himself from the family basically whenever there were things he didnt want to do, saying he felt ill or tired. It was terrifically frustrating for my cousin who was left to do everything - deal with the kids, sort the house, cook the meals. With hindsight, he was possibly depressed, but nonetheless his behaviour was selfish, and he took a while to recognise the impact on his family.

Your situation is rather different with your recurring illness but regardless I can imagine perhaps your DH has been under considerable strain and is struggling?

Well maybe if he didn't scream and shout at her she would recover more quickly and be able to be part of family life.

Just been taking time to be. I also returned to work today for the first time since before the attack and my last bout of meningitis.

I don’t think I’ve been sleeping TOO much.

But things have been really tough. Thankfully I haven’t been screamed awake again.

How are you doing @Youn?

It’s not normal.
You need to put your foot down.