To think the person inviting you out for a meal to celebrate friend/family special bday, should pay for the meal?

[TableFlowerss]

Birthday meal organised by partner of birthday person. A big birthday. Asked to go for meal to celebrate, 7 people all together.

Looking at about £30/35 per head for starter, main, desert.

Should the ‘host’ offer to pay for everyone’s meal?

YABU - Everyone should pay for their own meal if they’re close to the birthday person.

YANBU - partner should pay

No. You pay for your own food and drink and tbh I’d be expecting to chip in for the birthday persons food too.

No I would never expect the person organising to pay

Only on Mumsnet or programmes about the super rich have I ever seen the inviter pay for everyone.

No you would attend, eat and pay for yourself. Possibly covering the cost of the birthday person between everyone else.

I've never been to a meal where the organiser has paid for everyone.. we've paid for the birthday person but that's it.

When me and my friends have done that we've all paid for ourselves, but then we can afford to.

YABU.

Unless you’re going to drip feed that the guests are children YABU

Guests pay for their own meal

I'm going out for a meal at the weekend for a friend's milestone birthday, there will be a large group. I fully expect to pay for my own meal, I dread to think how much it would cost her/her partner if they paid for everyone!

I would expect to pay for a meal out. The host pays if it is a party.

Pay for your own. Unless you are splitting the bill and then the non drinkers pay for more than their share. That's another story ....

Invitation to a home, host pays (although I'd bring a bottle).

Oh, I'd expect guests to pay for themselves.

I don't live in a copy of Debretts though, where the host pays for everyone.

The partner (in this case) is just the organiser. I would absolutely expect to pay for myself and a part of the birthday persons meal.

@Window1

No you would attend, eat and pay for yourself. Possibly covering the cost of the birthday person between everyone else.

This is what i'd expect.

You pay for yourself. Then might get a surprise if organiser offers to cover drinks or buy a bottle of wine for the table.

@TableFlowerss

Birthday meal organised by partner of birthday person. A big birthday. Asked to go for meal to celebrate, 7 people all together.

Looking at about £30/35 per head for starter, main, desert.

Should the ‘host’ offer to pay for everyone’s meal?

No. YabVVVVu.

What is wrong with you

@Window1

No you would attend, eat and pay for yourself. Possibly covering the cost of the birthday person between everyone else.

This would be what I would expect.

You should pay yer tight arse

Wtf no! I invited a couple of friends for a fancy meal for my birthday the other day, should I have paid??? I’ve never known or been to any paid-for meals unless it was a corporate/workplace thing.

Oh and everyone might chip in for birthday person but not necessarily, partner should pay for them if not.

Hmm, depends on your circles.

When that happens within ours, the birthday person or partner would definitely pay for everyone.

No-one would expect the host to pay. And the host would absolutely never offer to pay 😱 - they just would quietly go off at the end and pay discreetly, no fuss.

I’ve been to very occasional celebratory meals where the person inviting has paid for everyone and I expect to pay for myself unless informed otherwise. Most of my family and friends, and probably most of the population would never be able to invite people out if they were expected to pay for everyone.

Seems unanimous

I'm now expecting the drip feed that OP is the organiser and someone they invited turned up expecting them to pay. 😅

No, pay your own plus share to cover cost for birthday person. Organising a get together doesn't mean paying out over £200! If you are short of money then you can just order accordingly and don't be pressured into subsidising anyone else's food and drinks (except for the birthday person's).