First time here eek

[pickle46]

Hello All
First time poster, what do I need to know about how Mumsnet works.
Any tips would be great
Thanks in advance to those who reply

Always remember to get your ducks in a row

DM may get hold of your story and post it online.

Welcome to the bear pit 😂😂

@vodkaredbullgirl

DM may get hold of your story and post it online.

Or it could be a hilarious item on Loose Women.

Neighbours are annoying
Dogs are annoying
Partners are annoying (although if someone acknowledges that their own partner is even mildly annoying you must reply with something like "He sounds like a d*, why were you ever with him?")
MIL are annoying
Bosses are annoying

Learnt a lot already but please keep sharing.

Apparently these mean something. Still to work out what exactly

means 'no comment' or 'I have never read such a load of old cobblers in my life and I'm not commenting further'.

To be properly passive aggressive use .

This list isn't complete (last time I looked it weirdly omitted ODFOD) but may be helpful.

www.mumsnet.com/i/acronyms

And seriously, www.mumsnet.com/i/netiquette

@FlorenceNightshade

Apparently these mean something. Still to work out what exactly

I always see a jammy dodger

is a reference to Eccentrica Gallumbits.

@Sparklingbrook thank you for that! See OP someone will always be along to offer wisdom

@vodkaredbullgirl

DM may get hold of your story and post it online.

Or the Reddit sub about Mumsnet will just accusing you of trolling.

If you can't be arsed to be dragged into the bunfight thread just send a PM to the OP.

@boomchikawowwow is it NOT a jammy dodger???

It is a jammy dodger.

Every single agency ever is just waiting for you personally to give "the missing piece of the puzzle".

Your neighbour looks at you funny, log it with 101, it could be the missing piece of the puzzle they need to swoop in and arrest them.

A school mum gives their kid fish fingers twice in one week, report it to SS, they are sitting with a plethora of evidence, but just need that one last puzzle piece to remove the kids.

Don't leave your washing out at night.. it will get darked on.

Make sure you make at least 15 meals out of your roast chicken left overs 👍

[quote FlorenceNightshade]@boomchikawowwow is it NOT a jammy dodger???[/quote]
It's all I can see it as so it must be!

If you scroll down to the 'smiley hints' it says 'No Comment' next to the biscuit.

At Christmas you can do these

All of the above plus never, ever moan about anyone else being annoying but never, ever be annoying yourself. For example, if your neighbours are making noise in their garden early in the morning then if you wanted quiet you should have moved to a house in the countryside where there are no neighbours, yet you should ensure that you don’t make any noise in your own garden at any time of day just in case it might annoy the neighbours.

Don't leave your washing out at night.. it will get darked on.

And spiders will rub their willies on it.

Don’t use fabric softener even if you like it. It’s repulsive… Apparently.

The biscuit is in reference to [ some politician ] who, during a live chat thing years and years ago refused to answer the question about what his favourite biscuit was and used typical politician speak.

If you have a question about whether your 12 year old should be allowed to do something on their own you will get a lot of posters telling you you are ridiculous and over protective and that they were canoeing across the Atlantic on dust bin lid by that age.

Everyone is handing out their first LTB