To think gynaecologist was a bit harsh ? ***title edited to add a trigger warning for content that might affect those with eating disorders***

[Boysandme269]

So basically I had my ds2 6 months ago and I'm EBF however my period returned 4 weeks ago and it was extremely heavy and then 2 weeks later I got another one

Having health anixtety this alarmed me
I've always had 28 day periods even after DS1 and never heavy so I wasn't expecting such issues nor for them to return so soon

My gp wasn't interested and said as I had a clear smear a month ago it would just be hormones settling down
However due to the health anixety I decided to see a gynaecologist privately

I explained the situation to gynaecologist and at first she was going down the I'm sure it's breastfeeding causing the issue
However I happened to say I've noticed this time I'm heavier than what I was with DS1 could this of contributed?

Now when I say I'm heavier I've always being slim and now I'm not my bmi is 25 so I think pushing overweight but I'm not huge

She glanced at me and looked to my stomach and said well yes you are holding Weight in your middle
She said it is probably making you realise more hormones etc
She went on to say I mean you could literally go 6 months without eating and be fine

By this point I was mortified and she started talking about problems from girls who hold weight around their middles

At this point I interjected and said I don't carry weight around my middle. I hold my weight around my hips and thighs, I've just not shifted all the baby weight yet

So she said well you must have developed insulin resistance because you have tummy fat now

Is it not normal to have a bit of excess fat 6 months after a c section?

I ended up having to show a picture of my pre pregnancy body to prove I do infact usually have a flat toned stomach

She asked if I had GD etc which I didn't
And then she did a scan

Cervix healthy .. womb healthy left ovary perfect but she said right ovary had a couple of follicles so it was trying to ovulate but when on to say my weight meant it polycystic

She also said I see you have a couple of hairs on your stomach so you probably have polycycstic ovary syndrome and you will be insulin resistant and told me to change my diet or I'd be diabetic type 2

Now prior to DS2 my bmi has always been around 21/22 .. I did get a couple of hairs on my tummy when pregnant but I am not hairy
I lose weight fairly easy.. I started gym this week and have lost almost half a stone so I feel il lose last baby weight fine

I have always had regular 28 day periods and conceived both my children on first month without contraception
I did not have GD and as part of a work up by my Gp in relation to another health condition
I categorically know I'm not pre diabetic or insulin resistance my sugars are fine ( needed to know for steroids I have to take)

I asked again at end of appointment if I have PCOS and she said not as such but I have problem induced by my weight it should resolve

I thought pcos was life long ? Also I've had scans on ovaries before and I've never had a few follicles

Do you think I'm being ridiculous to be upset by this manner ?
I basically feel like i look like a fat disgusting beast now
Does it should like I have Pcos ?
Also the smallest part of my body is my waist the fat on my tummy is like a little bit over my c section scar does this sound like I have a problem with my middle ?

Quite devastated with how repulsive this person felt I looked , thought I was doing OK for having had little one 6 months ago

I've lost a child, a late stillbirth.

This is absolutely nothing to do with you and your health OP, as you have a healthy 6mo old, congratulations.

I also don't know if you were taking steroids during pregnancy or not.

However, I've just alwsys promised the boy I lost that if I saw somewhere where there was either misinformation or information being missed out I'd speak up, in case it could help others.

Steroids during pregnancy, can mimic (not cause) the symptoms of GD. Whilst you wouldn't be diagnosed as having gestational diabetes, the effects of the steroids on your body can cause the same thing.

This wasn't what killed my son, I may add. However obviously GD can cause many issues during birth including stillbirth, god forbid.

I just want to put this here and I hope it's ok, please, If anyone is taking steroids during pregnancy, OP- I also have chronic illnesses requiring them, and indeed pregnancy often makes autoimmune diseases worse so you're more likely to need them....

Please speak up, please ask to be checked, please check that your Dr knows about this link because I can confirm that not all do.

Thank you, hopefully, for allowing me to post this - and OP it's nothing to do with weight , I promise , it's just wanting to educate, in case it could ever help another baby.

Also if anyone objects to that post being there I'll gladly report it to be deleted.

I also did not post it for any sympathy etc. Education purposes only.

What is health anxiety. Is that the same as hypocondria

A BMI of 25 is overweight. A BMI of 24.3 is bordering overweight. The gynocoligist was advising you on what you are. I have a bmi much less than yours but I have a squidgy middle - I would take the advice as it was meant - to be healthy you need to lose a few pounds.

Health anxiety is being overly anxious about health. Hypochondria is thinking you have all sorts of illnesses when you haven't.

I hope you are all right, op.

I have PCOS, even after bariatric surgery I still weigh 16stone and a BMI of 25 is never going to happen. As for hairs I could probably grow a longer beard than my hubby if I didn't shave and use my Phillips thingy twice a week!
I once had a nurse who was struggling during a smear test (they always do as I have a tilted cervix) tell me that if I lost weight it would make my smear easier. She wasn't too impressed when I asked for a weight loss diet for my vagina! I was only a few weeks out from bariatric surgery and really wasn't in the mood for judgemental people who really should read medical notes.

My Grandma always said to me that only words from people who matter should matter. You know you are healthy and loved and what you can healthily do to get even more healthy. Live by that and not the fleeting words of someone who really doesn't know you.

@whatthejiggeries you can have a bmi of 24 and be healthier than someone with a bmi of 20

When I started eating better after ED , I did weight training at one point my bmi was almost 24, my body fat percentage however was extremely low and I had no squidgy middle or any squidgy part

Pre pregnancy bmi of 22 no squidgy bits for Me

I think 6 months after a baby its a not a long term health risk to have my bmi and she probably didn't need to be the way she was about it
And if I had come to that conclusion earlier I wouldn't of made this silly post and would of complained about her

In all honesty there is no point in paying to see professionals if you are in denial. 25 is overweight. 24 is top of your weight range. It would be most unusual for you not to have any flabby bits even at 24. It doesn't mean you don't look fine but she is there to advise you and that's what she is doing.

@stayingaliveisawayoflife oh my goodness how ridiculous to say losing weight would make a smear easier
Do some people just get a buzz out of making cruel comments?
Power trip maybe

Your comment is so lovely
I think clearly my hormones are all over the place hence being so emotional about this appointment but you are so right I have a lovely husband ( who clearly isn't alarmed by my bmi he's just came back from the shops and suggested a movie and ice cream)

And I have two lovely children and I hopefully won't ever have to see this gynaecologist again
I've yet to tell Dh about the comments from the appointment but I've feeling he won't be happy

See that shows to me that you are massively over reacting. 25 is overweight on any chart. To call me vile for stating facts indicates you are overly sensitive to people pointing this out.

@whatthejiggeries

She didn't even check my bmi she said what she said based on looking at hence me being so insulted

I knew my bmi was around 25 as I weighed myself the week before the appointment

So she wasn't stating facts she was being horrible
And you can be have a higher bmi and a lower body fat percentage than some one with a lower bmi
I've spent enough of my life obsessing over it to know

OK what ever you say

@whatthejiggeries

See that shows to me that you are massively over reacting. 25 is overweight on any chart. To call me vile for stating facts indicates you are overly sensitive to people pointing this out.

How was ‘you could 6 months without eating’ a fact?

You need to go back to school @whatthejiggeries

I'm sure she has better things to do than purposely be horrible to people who had paid her. It was probably said you be in cheek and as a response to the fact that the OP is in denial that she is overweight - which at 25 she is. We weren't there but the fact is the doctor is trying to give her medical advice based on what she's seen and the OP doesn't want to hear it. The six months thing wouldn't bother me but OP is clearly overly sensitive. Apparently I'm vile for stating that a BMI of 25 is overweight - it is. Can you imagine the response the doctor got!!

I think I would complain about this doctor and would look for any opportunities to review my experience in a factual and accurate way. It sounds like she treated you really badly, esp given your vulnerabilities.

Pay no attention to the 'nasties', Boysandme. I think the doctor was extremely tactless, frankly, far too quick to make a judgement.

I'm beginning to understand why my friend was upset and decided not to post here any more. It is so unfair to pile on to a person who is already anxious.

Whatthejiggeries, your comments are uncalled for. The doctor was exceptionally rude, and your comments to someone with an ED are horrendous.

Boysandme, you seem absolutely lovely. You shouldn’t have to, but do leave this thread and spend time with your lovely family.

Don’t know what’s going on with the posters this evening.

Hi OP, health anxiety is a very distressing condition. I'm sure you realise that by going for private consultations, you are feeding your anxiety, not reducing it. A probably minor issue, that would almost certainly have settled down, had you given it time, has been blown way out of proportion. Continue your efforts towards shifting your baby weight healthily, and give your periods time to settle. 6 months is a common time for bf to start having periods - often linked to baby starting solids and drinking water, and taking less BM. I hope you see some improvement in your anxiety as the year goes on 💐

Apologies, meant to say, the comment re not eating for 6 months was a ridiculous thing to say to any patient. I very much doubt she found you repulsive or disgusting though.

If you go to the gym 5 times a week and are losing a stone a fortnight you're going to end up very, very ill.

I do think the gynecologist was very harsh. She was treating a vulnerable, unclothed human being and spoke to you in a cold, judgmental manner that would naturally make you feel unattractive and unhealthy, which I am sure you are not. It sounds to me as if you are doing an amazing job with your health considering your circumstances. We are all human beings just trying to do our best in the world and we don't need that kind of shit from our doctors. Just because they see us when we are naked does not mean they are smarter than we are or better than we are. We are all adults and the respect should be mutual.

Plenty of slim women have pcos but did she do any blood tests? If not she probably has no idea what she is talking about.

@Beachmum23 no she said no follow ups or bloods necessary as would resolve once my weight goes back to normal ..