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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To lock the jackass in (parking thread)

999 replies

BlueEyesWhiteDragon · 31/07/2021 10:57

I live in a rural location which is very popular with walkers / bikers / horse riders etc. It's heaving today for some unknown reason as the weather is rubbish!

We have 2 driveways. One which was with the original cottage then a small bit of garden then a second which leads to the additional land we have. The second driveway the forestry commission have a ROW over as the track continues up into the forest. Next to that driveway is a footpath. Both driveways have gates at either end and both say private property/dogs running loose. (Diagram attached - not to scale!)

I have just had a straw delivery and so opened the second driveway gates to let the farmer in and trundled round the back to show him where to put them. He's unloaded and driven off and I've gone to lock the gates back up. Literally as he's driven off and I'm walking down a guy has pulled in the gates and parked up and 3 kids have jumped out and he started unloading their bikes.

I politely ask him to move as he's on private land and he says there are no signs he thought it was a parking spot. I say they are on the gate and it's clearly an enclosed piece of land that is not a parking space and he says he couldn't see them as the gates were open but he'll only be a few minutes. No problem, I say, I'll pop back and shut the gates in 5. Off I toddle.

I have returned and his car is still there and he has gone. He has left a note on the windscreen which says "had to park here no other spaces". I mean WTF?!

WIBU to shut the gates, padlock the fucker in, block the gates with my truck AND then disappear for at least 48 hours?

To lock the jackass in (parking thread)
OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
titchy · 31/07/2021 14:51

Has any seen a thread titled 'AIBU to wonder where the fuck dh and the kids are'? Grin

sunshinesupermum · 31/07/2021 14:52

Personally now I'd go for the tow solution mentioned much earlier. He is being a complete and utter txxt.

Kipperandarthur · 31/07/2021 14:52

He’s now adding double twat onto his original twat. Any normal person wouldn’t have done this in the first place. Then to come back twice thinking miraculously your truck is going to have moved is beyond stupid.

Obviously the kids are going to be very fed up soon so he will have no choice other than to return and approach your property to be let out. Stick with it. I would be livid.

Seriously79 · 31/07/2021 14:52

@BlueEyesWhiteDragon

I have locked the gates and put my truck in the way.

I have chickened out of DBs tow idea as am concerned that if he rings the police to report it missing I'd get in trouble when it was found out I'd done it.

I would advise 'having a drink' or at least getting a wine glass out, and make it look like you are drinking. You can't possibly move your car if you have been drinking 😉 the CF will have to come back tomorrow.
Wineat5isfine · 31/07/2021 14:52

@titchy

Has any seen a thread titled 'AIBU to wonder where the fuck dh and the kids are'? Grin
🤣🤣🤣
Fernando072020 · 31/07/2021 14:52

Wow. From the beginning this guy was a cf. But all his actions since then have rendered him a complete prick. Sending his kids over the fence, cycling off and now for a third time. He fucked up and now he won't even come and apologise and ask you to open the gate? He's expecting to come back to magically opened gates. What a shock he'll get when he realises that ain't happening and he'll need to come knocking

sunshinesupermum · 31/07/2021 14:52

titchy Ha!

Lysianthus · 31/07/2021 14:54

You never know, he might have gone to the shops for an apology bottle of wine 🍷 🤣

Popetthetreehugger · 31/07/2021 14:55

I have no idea how people do this !! I get edgy if my tyres are too close to the parking bay line 🤦‍♀️ . Enjoy lunch and a glass ( bottle) of wine and a little snooze may be in order … shame your such a deeeep sleeper 😴

sherlockhomeless · 31/07/2021 14:55

I'd open the gate then and let the dogs have access to where the child is getting over

BillyWhozz · 31/07/2021 14:55

@BlueEyesWhiteDragon

I think he may be brazening me out

They've just been back, put the bags back and cycled off again.

I mean this is a fun game and all but is he expecting the gates to magically open?

To quote Will Smith in Bad Boys, "shit just got real".

Hold firm.

HaveringWavering · 31/07/2021 14:56

@BlueEyesWhiteDragon

Normally the dogs are loose and have access over the whole lot if we in.

I've drawn a diagram (without cock and ball trees) to show but if you imagine rings around the house thats what it's like. So the first ring the dogs have whether we in or out and they have free access to get in and out the house via dog flaps. We've then for 5 million gates opening up into the other rings which we an open / shut at will.

I wouldn't want parking man to have a leg to stand on about complaining though so I won't let the dogs out any further than they already were :)

Wow. That is a lot of gates!
CandyLeBonBon · 31/07/2021 14:56

A Saturday afternoon parking thread. What fun!

CanofCant · 31/07/2021 14:56

What a piece of shit. So they keep jumping your fence?

Grr, I know it's a bad idea for all the reasons mentioned before but I would be sorely tempted to let the dogs out in the drive 2 part. Who the fuck does he think he is?!

UnsuitableHat · 31/07/2021 14:57

What an idiot. What does he think is going to happen? Following with great interest on slow Saturday afternoon!

dapsnotplimsolls · 31/07/2021 14:57

Sorry to be vulgar but I wonder how his kids feel about crapping in the woods? He'll probably knock at your door asking to use the toilet ...

BillyWhozz · 31/07/2021 14:57

@titchy

Has any seen a thread titled 'AIBU to wonder where the fuck dh and the kids are'? Grin
Perhaps this is why cyclists are away for so long? One hour cycling, four trying to retrieve the badly parked car!
MotherofTerriers · 31/07/2021 14:57

ooo I like the idea of your brother answering the door and saying that you'll probably be back at about the same time tomorrow. And if not, Monday......
I'd go out for a carvery. And wine

Original poster
BlueEyesWhiteDragon · 31/07/2021 14:57

@HaveringWavering yeah it is. My dad loves a gate. Always have 2 when 1 will do 😀

OP posts:
Planty13 · 31/07/2021 14:58

I would go out for a couple of hours. Seriously. Just treat yourself and get a carvery today too 🙈 I’m sure you can find a reason to go out if you think really hard Grin

bluedomino · 31/07/2021 14:59

Don't forget to imbibe lots of wine so you can't risk driving your truck. It will be at least 24 hours for the alcohol to get out of your system. Make the cheeky arse wait. He may think twice about doing it in future!

CaptainThe95thRifles · 31/07/2021 14:59

@dapsnotplimsolls

Sorry to be vulgar but I wonder how his kids feel about crapping in the woods? He'll probably knock at your door asking to use the toilet ...
They're learning life skills thanks to the OP. Might be useful if society collapses.

I also love a bit of gate porn. Which is an unusual fetish, but...

lunar1 · 31/07/2021 15:00

Once we have a conclusion this thread has to go in classics!

WiddlinDiddlin · 31/07/2021 15:01

Carvery two days in a row is just fine, and I'll fight anyone who says differently.

I wonder how much longer before his kids get fed up and whingey, surely they have run out of snacks and loo roll by now, shit's gotta get real pretty soon.

bluebeck · 31/07/2021 15:01

I would go out and leave the truck there.

Idiot bloke - he can get someone to come and pick him up.