To think at 6.50 on CBBEES it is totally inappropriate to......

[lucyellensmum]

tantalise me with Will Self (is that his name?) laying on the bed with those bloody tight jeans on.

Honestly, it really is TOO much - my hormones are on a rampage

Well it seems we are two seperate camps;

on one side we have the SELFS

and on the other we have the MELLORS.

and never the twain shall meet it seems!

There do sound more interesting anecdotes on the SELF side. Not that I'm biased of course.

honk retch and spit up at will mellor

cream at will self

will self is far more interesting than mellor. Natch.

I don;t think self should have done shooting stars, though. Really wasn't his niche at all. What an embarrassment

lol honk retch spit up PYBF
And Pointy, SS was ill advised..
but mmj! such strenght of feelign - why so?

note to self:
Don't do SS again. Give up illegal substs?

Wah, wah, waaaah.

Mmj laced will self's drink with rophynol. He failed to keel over as planned. He stood firm and said: "I don't want any fancy business, no dirty sex mmj." She said: "No way - it's dirty sex or no sex." He said: "No, I want it missionary with the lights out". She said: "No way" - they can't stand one another, even now 7 months after the event.

I'm just experimenting with how you could have sex with both of them at the same time but my guess is you would just have to put up with a night's drinking with will self followed by sex doggy style over a dustbin and then go back to your rural idyll the next day where will mellors would greet you with pitchfork, smile and naked torso.

btw i've only started fancying will mellors now i've got a bit older is it cos he has aged well a la linekar or is that that he just does it for middle aged women and not younger ones

mmj - green with nausea is good. It is to 2007 what spanking and leather thigh-length boots were to 1987.

mmj - lol

Will Mellor is attending the bar i go to in a cuople of weeks.

I shall be there very ealry and not leave until i have had my wicked way with him.

i look foward to telling you all about it in 2067

mmj i think in life men who are excellent lovers often have an inner 'smugness' safe in the confidence that they can pleasure any woman
this is obviously the case with will self

lol @ swede's script. INspired

will you all think im really stupid if i admit to having never actually heard of Will Self, apart from thinking he was Will Mellors?? But if he is a junkie, that couldnt be more unattractive, now i like a bad boy (i actually had a thing about anthony hopkins for a while after silence of the lambs, and i like jack nicholson too) as much as the next one, but for me, drugs are a turn off.

Also Will self is a bit of a perv....has anyone read cock and bull?

he has lovely teeth, though, janny - you must admit

beautiful complexion

I have just gone off WS after looking at that pic. I didn't realise he was so ugly.... and it looked possible he might be ginger. Though I can't be sure, I ran away from the computer screaming Nooooooooo before I got a good look.