To want a baby at 36

[Hg176]

In a stable, loving relationship and want to have a baby. Just turned 36 in July. This wasn’t really on the cards before as I’ve been so career focused.

I’m worried I’ve left it too late and everything around ‘geriatric’ pregnancy is scaring the life out of me! AIBU?

I had my 2 dd at 36 and 39

I had at 36 and one at 38, as the time wasn’t right earlier. I was never referred to as having a geriatric pregnancy for either one, and even had to go private for nuchal scans as I wasn’t considered old enough for a free one in my area (this was a few years ago). I met lots of mums as old as me and older at playgroups.

I mentioned the term geriatric mother to my midwife at my booking appt for this baby (I was 36, now 37) and she said I wasn't anywhere near old enough to have a 'label'! I don't think anything 30s is considered old any more, they certainly haven't been bothered with me being 34/35 and 36/37 at all.

I’m your age. Would you tell me I’m a geriatric mother who’s potentially left it too late if I told you I wanted a baby at 36? I bet you wouldn’t. So don’t go into it with that fearful negative mindset yourself. And if you want to do it, and everyone is on board, crack on. You’re not old.

It's quite a normal age to have DC I had mine at 35 & 36

I’m actually feeling so excited that it’s not too late! Thank you all! I’d kind of resigned myself to it being too late but now I feel all happy and excited

Echoing what others have said, 36 is not remotely old to have a baby - I wouldn’t blink an eye if one of my friends suggested it (and I know plenty who have).

I don't know where you got the idea that it was too late in this day and age!
Best of luck with it all!

@Hg176

In a stable, loving relationship and want to have a baby. Just turned 36 in July. This wasn’t really on the cards before as I’ve been so career focused.

I’m worried I’ve left it too late and everything around ‘geriatric’ pregnancy is scaring the life out of me! AIBU?

Gave birth to my 2 at 37 and 39. The nuchal fold test (for downs) each time, gave me the same risk as an 18 year old. Both our parents tried 10 years (at much younger age) to have children. One week trying each time - to our surprise. Almost all the parents at my boys local primary were the same age as me. So crack on and good luck.

Welcome to the world of parenting. There's always something to worry about, even before conception...

Don't let that put you off though! I had my DD at 36 and she's the best thing that's ever happened.

YANBU

Had my kids at 34 and 37. Both conceived first month of trying. I realise I was lucky.

You are not being unreasonable.

@Maireas

I had mine at 36, I was never referred to as geriatric, and that was 25 years ago. If you were 46 it would be more problematic. You're still young! There was a woman on here claiming to be pregnant at 53, but the thread was deleted.

i think you can get pregnant at 53 but are very unlikely to result in a live baby.

Not too old but don’t delay imo

@Dogvmarmot yes, I would imagine that's the problem, a live birth from a pregnancy at that age. I was looking it up, past 50 the chances are miniscule. Tends to be IVF and donor eggs.

I had my first at 17 and my last/ 5th at 37. The last pregnancy and birth were no harder than any of the others , the only difference was I had to have blood thinning injections at home for a week afterwards, my DH did them, no biggie. Go for it , just don’t hang around!

Op I had Dc1 at 39 and Dc2 at 41. You are definitely not too old

As far as I know the term ‘geriatric’ isn’t actually used. I thought it got changed to advanced maternal age or something but I could be wrong. I was 34 when DD was born and mo reference to age was made

YANBU!!

Had my first at 34 and second at 36. One at 36 took 7 months to conceive. Both births were straight forward. I think I was a better mum than younger me would have been. More patient and not so sad to see my party days fade away for a bit.
Just give it go and see what happens, you can't always choose how life pans out, if you hadn't met a decent partner before, now's your time.

Had my first at just turned 36, and the second one 16 months later at 37.

My only caveat is that I was told at 35 that I had low ovarian reserve for my age - which basically meant I would run out of time quicker than a lot of people so in my particular situation it’s just as well I didn’t leave it any longer. The chances are that you’ll be fine. If you’ve decided to go for it though, I wouldn’t leave it much longer.

I came off contraception last year at 36 thinking of all the scare stories that it would take forever to fall pregnant, if it happened at all.

It didn’t, it took 3 months of actual tracking and trying and I’m now almost 6 months. I had tried to time it for finishing my last year at university but alas, baby had different ideas and they’ll be born 3 months into my first trimester 🙈

I’ve already made it known that if anyone dares call me a “geriatric” mother, they will hear me! I’ve also been classed as low risk (at 37 and slightly overweight), I wouldn’t even know I was pregnant if not for all the scans I’ve had, I’ve had barely any symptoms and no trouble at all so far, fingers crossed it stays that way.

Go for it 🙌🏻

I'm now 39 but mentioned to a couple of gynecologists that I had seen for other issues (when I was 37) that I was concerned about my age and TTC. Both gynecologists said that there was no issue with my age and that it was more in your 40s that were considered to be a little more problematic.

First at 38 here naturally. Get on the folic acid and good luck!!