AIBU to think that all men are a bit shit?

[Vitallyli]

I love DH, he's intelligent, generous, loves me, our DS, our dog, my family, he's not a cheater, not a gambler, but he also has low self esteem, can get paranoid about me cheating, can get depressed, drinks more than I think is okay, we are in our mid 30s, can shout at me sometimes, doesn't help me around the house much would rather make me a massage. He tells me compliments daily though, boosted my self esteem after birth for which I'll be eternally grateful. I hope I paint a fair picture. AIBU to think that all men are flawed and there is no perfect relationships and women have to put up with one thing or another or is there a beautiful loving, caring and respectful relationships out there?

..and then you woke up@Vitallyli
Yes indeed all men are shit..Happily single for the past12 years&wouldnt change this if Prince was still alive &called me up desparate(ok last bit was a lie)

There are indeed a lot of shit men (and women) but if you need pulled from a burning building it'll almost certainly be a man who risks his life for you. Same if you get kidnapped or taken hostage etc.

As Churchill said "the average person sleeps peaceably in their bed at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."

Sorry but that argument is absolutely ridiculous.

Firstly, the people we need protecting from are.... yes you guessed it.... Men! If you get kidnapped or taken hostage it will be by a man! So if men weren't so violent, we wouldn't need protection in the first place.

Second, women can and do become soldiers, fire fighters etc, even though they have been historically prevented from doing so.

Third, just because some men joined the army, I'm not sure how this means Dave next door, who has never worked a day outside in his life and rarely leaves the couch, doesn't have to do his own house work. Or that OPs husband gets to scream and berate her.

@TreeSmuggler

Sorry but that argument is absolutely ridiculous.

Firstly, the people we need protecting from are.... yes you guessed it.... Men! If you get kidnapped or taken hostage it will be by a man! So if men weren't so violent, we wouldn't need protection in the first place.

Second, women can and do become soldiers, fire fighters etc, even though they have been historically prevented from doing so.

Third, just because some men joined the army, I'm not sure how this means Dave next door, who has never worked a day outside in his life and rarely leaves the couch, doesn't have to do his own house work. Or that OPs husband gets to scream and berate her.

But the thread title is saying all men are shit, which is a bit harsh if you're including the man who pulls you out of a burning building (and it will usually be a man).

Your other issue is that you seem to group all men together, so you view the men fighting fascism the same as the fascists, which is a very childlike view.

When the Nazis started invading countries and putting people in death camps, the vast majority of British men were happy to put their lives on the line to fight. In trenches with their feet rotting off and having to pick up the dismembered limbs of their friends. To liken these men to the people they were fighting against is downright insulting when you consider what they sacrificed for people like yourself.

Men who 'get paranoid about cheating' are shit. Major red flag. But what's a major red flag to one person is a tee-hee-silly-quirk to another. Drinking too much and shouting - nah, sorry. Absolute non-starter.

I mean, the best you came up with is he chucks out a few compliments and doesn't gamble. This is a shockingly low bar. Seems more like you just haven't met a decent bloke.