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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Sister in law gave my son covid

191 replies

Hijabigirl234 · 22/07/2021 09:15

I’m still fuming right now,but basically we went to visit my sister in laws house on Saturday the 17th ( their household is our bubble) she said nothing to us about being next to someone who tested positive for covid,nothing. She was there kissing my kids and everything ( they are 5&4), this Tuesday the 20th comes around,it’s Eid and my sons birthday party ( he’s 4 today!) I spoke to her the night before,my husband saw her the night before, she came with her family to our house for the party even knowing my dad who is fully jabbed but still vunerable was their, she said nothing. Early hours of wed morning my son jumped into bed with me, and he was coughing a cough I have never heard before ( sounding very dry and almost like a bark) I knew nothing at this point but I don’t know why I had a feeling he had covid. Wed afternoon my sister in law texts me a picture saying “ guess what my covid test is positive. last wed I was next to my friend we went to the gym together,and my friend tested positive on Friday. I have been feeling really unwell since Monday,feeling like I have the flu but I didn’t want to take my covid test before eid/my sons birthday because I didn’t want it to ruin my eid day to go out because I’d have to isolate."

Just think, this woman not only came to my house, but afterwards went to her husbands family house who has a large family,the same woman who since Monday has been going out here their and everywhere without a mask whilst knowing she was close to someone with covid and herself showing symptoms.

I can’t stop being so angry, I think she is extremely selfish that she had not 1,but 2 opportunities to tell us she had been next to someone with covid and showing symptoms, my 4 year old son,who’s birthday is today has tested positive for covid and he’s coughing too ( me,my husband and daughter have tested neg)

AIBU to think she is the most selfish person to do this,to go all these places knowing her situation very well, to come inside my house kissing and hugging my children knowing she has symptoms and knowing she most likely had covid. I was so angry last night that I told my husband to call his sister and kick of because this behaviour is disgusting, he shouted at me and said well it’s wrong but what can I do now.

The thing that makes me more angry is,is that when my little boys test came back positive, she was sending laughing emojis ( 🤣😂) so it’s clearly just all a very big joke to her.

What a lovely 4th birthday present she has given to her nephew.

post edited by MNHQ in order to avoid further confusion

OP posts:
MrsN100 · 22/07/2021 09:53

yanbu, I hope you will be telling her exactly how selfish she is??
I could never be the same with someone again once I knew how selfish that they could be.

TeaDrinker98 · 22/07/2021 09:53

OP she's definitely unreasonable. You poor thing!! You now not only have to look after your poor DC, and you're massively inconvenienced in other ways and may end up sick too.

I'd be furious with SIL. Have you told her how angry you are?

FuckingHateRats · 22/07/2021 09:53

What's your husband saying about it all?

dementedpixie · 22/07/2021 09:54

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

You are a massive hypocrite.

You've been feeling unwell since Monday but didn't want to take a test in case it 'ruined your plans'?

It could be YOU that has infected everyone!

I'm just blown away by your arrogance and stupidity.

OP has explained now that it was SIL that was feeling unwell not herself- OP has tested negative
TonkinLenkicks · 22/07/2021 09:54

In all honesty I don’t think I could have someone like that near me ever again. Understand why you might not be able to but you’re d have to go NC with someone who had so little regard for the health of my family.

TeaDrinker98 · 22/07/2021 09:54

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

You are a massive hypocrite.

You've been feeling unwell since Monday but didn't want to take a test in case it 'ruined your plans'?

It could be YOU that has infected everyone!

I'm just blown away by your arrogance and stupidity.

The irony of this post 😂
custardbear · 22/07/2021 09:54

She's be getting a massive bollocking from me, abs DH, she could potentially have cause serious illness in others with her selfishness

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 22/07/2021 09:55

I'm really sorry to read this, @Hijabigirl234, and I don't think you're being unreasonable about this at all. I was living in the UAE during Eid 2020, and there, the decision was taken by the authorities to end lockdown and to allow people to go shopping in malls, and to visit and mix with family members, for Eid, so that people wouldn't feel deprived after Ramadan (and also, money). The resulting rising figures for Covid in the 3 weeks following that opening up were ridiculous, even though mosques hadn't been allowed to open.
If I were you, I would want to compeletly cut off relations with my sister-in-law, but I understand how difficult that might be. I can't understand the utter selfishness of some people (or is it stupidity, or is it both?), it beggars belief.
I do hope that this cough is all your little boy suffers from, and that he gets well soon, with no further symptoms or consequences.

Mummyoflittledragon · 22/07/2021 09:56

Your SIL and her husband are thick as pig shit.

Dohrehmee · 22/07/2021 09:56

This is one of the reasons why covid Is being spread. Irresponsible people like your Sil. I’d be tempted to report her if that’s possible.some people can get long covid from getting it. Whsts really infuriating is that she thinks it’s a joke .

Dyrne · 22/07/2021 09:57

Oops, sorry OP - I voted YABU before reading the comments, didn’t realise you were still quoting your SIL’s message.

If she is the also one who saw friend in gym/felt ill etc; then YANBU - and the fact that she’s so dismissive of it shows she doesn’t think COVID can be serious.

Hijabigirl234 · 22/07/2021 09:57

@catfunk

How close was she to the person who had tested positive ? Did she definitely get it from them?
Yes, it’s her friend and she goes 5 days a week to the gym with her plus goes to her house daily and vice verse, they are friends aswell as next door neighbours. Her friend got it from her son,then the friend tested positive along with her household and now my sister in law. If that makes sense so it’s pretty certain where she got it from x
OP posts:
dillydallydollydaydream7 · 22/07/2021 09:58

This is awful!!!!

I hope your son has a speedy recovery. My BIL tested positive yesterday so DH is isolating and my anxiety is through the roof over us catching it. YANBU at all!

Loudestcat14 · 22/07/2021 09:58

To clarify, this is you quoting everything your SIL said? SHE'S the one who went to gym with the friend and didn't want to take the test? The way you've written it, it sounds like she told you her friend tested positive but YOU didn't want to the take the test before your son's birthday.

Wed afternoon my sister in law texts me a picture saying “ guess what my covid test is positive “ last wed I was next to my friend we went to the gym together,and my friend tested positive on Friday. I have been feeling really unwell since Monday,feeling like I have the flu but I didn’t want to take my covid test before eid/my sons birthday because I didn’t want it to “ruin my eid day to go out ” because I’d have to isolate.

PommieCheeks75 · 22/07/2021 09:58

Wait. What? If she had a positive PCR test NHS trace will be emailing, texting and calling her for a list of people she has been in contact with for the last 12 days, trust me I know!
Also anyone she has had contact with must isolate, I currently have Covid (and am double vaxxed) it’s not fun, her husband should not be going to work!!!

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 22/07/2021 09:59

Oh, also, please send her this link to government guidelines for households where there is a positive case of Covid-19: www.gov.uk/government/publications/covid-19-stay-at-home-guidance/stay-at-home-guidance-for-households-with-possible-coronavirus-covid-19-infection I would want to report her to someone about this, but as it's only guidelines, I fear they are not actually breaking the law, and there will be no consequences, amazing though that sounds to me!

MrsIsobelCrawley · 22/07/2021 09:59

I have been feeling really unwell since Monday,feeling like I have the flu but I didn’t want to take my covid test before eid/my sons birthday because I didn’t want it to “ruin my eid day

Wow. How completely selfish of you.

Jennylou88 · 22/07/2021 09:59

@Hijabigirl234 that's absolutely awful. I'd be raging as well. I'm mad on your behalf! I can't believe she's basically put her own enjoyment over the health of her family!
Personally I don't think I could get past this, not when it's my kids that suffered. You're well within your rights to let her know how incredibly selfish she has been. I'd send her a picture of the two ill children and say thanks for the birthday present. Id also tell her not to contact you as you need some time to reevaluate your friendship with her.

Hope the kids feel better soon! Flowers

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 22/07/2021 10:00

OP's original post said,

I have been feeling really unwell since Monday,feeling like I have the flu but I didn’t want to take my covid test before eid/my sons birthday because I didn’t want it to “ruin my eid day to go out ” because I’d have to isolate.

It was't in speech marks so I assumed it was about/from the OP.

If it was from SIL, then yes, she is massively selfish and I take back the hypocrite comment.

Hijabigirl234 · 22/07/2021 10:00

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

You are a massive hypocrite.

You've been feeling unwell since Monday but didn't want to take a test in case it 'ruined your plans'?

It could be YOU that has infected everyone!

I'm just blown away by your arrogance and stupidity.

Wow 😂 this whole post was about my sister in law who came to my house not telling anyone she was next to someone who tested positive and she also had symptoms herself, then didn’t want to take a test until eid was finish because she didn’t want to ruin her day and her plans, she is the one who later tested positive after not only coming to my home kissing and hugging my children but also other people’s houses and outside without a mask, because of her my son has tested positive for covid, me and my husband and daughree negative. So if that’s my arrogance and stupidy for doing my best and doing what’s right after my sister in law has put us in a horrible situation then I don’t know what to say.
OP posts:
WhoNeedsaManOfTheWorld · 22/07/2021 10:01

Apologies OP. I misunderstood Flowers
SIL is an idiot

dementedpixie · 22/07/2021 10:01

@MrsIsobelCrawley

I have been feeling really unwell since Monday,feeling like I have the flu but I didn’t want to take my covid test before eid/my sons birthday because I didn’t want it to “ruin my eid day

Wow. How completely selfish of you.

That's apparently the SILs words not OPs Although that's how I took it too when I first read it
Hijabigirl234 · 22/07/2021 10:02

@MrsIsobelCrawley

I have been feeling really unwell since Monday,feeling like I have the flu but I didn’t want to take my covid test before eid/my sons birthday because I didn’t want it to “ruin my eid day

Wow. How completely selfish of you.

Read my other posts, it is not ME. It’s about my sister in law, so read ALL the comments after my original post and stop calling me selfish, I was writing this post in a rush whilst angry and forgot to put the speech marks where necessary.
OP posts:
dementedpixie · 22/07/2021 10:03

@Hijabigirl234 you wrote a confusing post with only some of your SILs words in speech marks. You can't berate people for getting confused when you haven't been clear with who said what

thenakedmolerat · 22/07/2021 10:03

Meh.
Did you used to fume if someone passed on a cold?