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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to see any adult who hasn’t had the vaccine

331 replies

Fthisshitimdone · 15/07/2021 23:15

I don’t feel like I want to hang out with anyone who has refused the vaccine. AIBU? It’s not only because I am worried they are carrying the virus it’s also because I resent them. I think they’re being selfish and also that they think they’re better than the rest of us!

OP posts:
DeeCeeCherry · 16/07/2021 02:30

What makes them think they’re so special that they shouldn’t have the vaccine?
.
Ask them that, just as you've phrases it's here and it's likely they won't want to hang out with you anyway. Problem solved

There is no way you'll always know who has and hasn't had the vaccine anyway. So you can be certain you're going to be near an un-vaccinated leper more times then you realise.

Unless you become a hermit.

Hibbs126 · 16/07/2021 02:59

I would rather hang out with unvaccinated people who are being cautious about where they are going/what they are doing than vaccinated people who feel that they are immune so don't social distance etc.
I haven't yet had the vaccine as breastfeeding a newborn and don't feel like there has been enough time to properly see any long term side effects. I will have it at some point but in the meantime I am only meeting up with people outside, will continue to wear a mask in shops and I do a rapid flow rest before going to appointments etc. so I don't feel I am putting others at risk by not having had it yet.

Thekindofwindowsfaceslookinat · 16/07/2021 03:13

Is this some kind of badly-aimed focus group research?

avamiah · 16/07/2021 03:19

@TheKindofwindowsfaceslookinat
Lol,
No it’s just MUMSNET

vodkaredbullgirl · 16/07/2021 03:22
Biscuit
Tenohfour · 16/07/2021 03:27

Is it all aspects of bodily autonomy you are against or just vaccines? Would you force someone to be sterilised if it was for the greater good? Force them to take antibiotics/withhold antibiotics from them? If I had a contagious illness would you lock me up to keep others safe? When I'm giving birth would you let me make choices or let a risks and benefits based computer algorithm decide? You seem very keen to control other people's bodies.

Pixxie7 · 16/07/2021 03:45

What a horrible thing to say, there are all sorts of reasons people haven’t had the vaccine.

Jent13c · 16/07/2021 04:03

I'm incredibly pro vax but not sure I want to live in a country with no choice re vaccines.

I have a friend who is approaching 30 and trying to bave her first baby. When we were offered the vaccine (NHS) in Dec the evidence was entirely different to now and we were advised not to have if planning family in next few months. She held off as advised but obviously TTC doesn't always go to plan. I have literally no judgment for her and see her most days and if I was actively TTC may make the same decision. After a miscarriage she decided v recently just to get the vaccine but it was a very hard decision for her. When we were offered it as far as we knew there hadn't been babies born post mum being vaccinated and no evidence that there was no birth defects etc.

On the other hand my MIL has a conspiracy theorist covid denier friend who is entirely anti mask/anti social distancing/anti vax and i was absolutely no desire to be near him socially. Probably nothing to do with his personal vaccination status but our entire values just do not align and this whole pandemic has probably made that more apparent. I can't get on board with someone who believes that 6 months after the jab a trigger will be switched on by the government and we will be unable to trade and something to do with the rapture or something. I can't get on board with some one essentially calling me a liar and pubically declaring that I'm not spending 12 hour shifts trying to maintain oxygen saturations of fit 30 odd year olds and eventually sending them up to HDU for a higher level of care because no matter how much oxygen I give them I can't stop them being hypoxic because it's 'all a hoax orchestrated by the government'.

BrightonRocks89 · 16/07/2021 04:14

Gosh this division between the vaccinated vs not vaccinated is getting ridiculous! I don't judge people at all for their decisions, but I'm starting to judge those who judge others about their own personal decisions. Why do I feel I'm in the minority with this? Why is body autonomy, freedom of choice etc the minority? Ridiculous! Confused

Lucidas · 16/07/2021 04:21

I have had literally every other vaccine

Have a medal.

including yellow fever an never had a single side effect - not even a mild one.

Aka if a vaccine side effect hasn’t happened to you or someone you know it doesn’t exist. Great critical thinking skills.

Risks of yellow fever vaccine:

  • severe allergic reaction, which affects about 1 in 55,000 people
  • severe nervous system reaction, which affects about 1 in 125,000 people
- severe illness with organ failure, which affects about 1 in 250,000
astraaurelis · 16/07/2021 04:23

Sorry.. just wanting to make sure I understand this thread correctly?
Are you saying that if someone makes a personal decision to not inject themselves with a vaccine which is still in trial and not yet classified as proven safe then they should be punished?

Please, i'd LOVE to hear you elaborate further...

Suzi888 · 16/07/2021 04:26

@Fthisshitimdone

I feel like I want them penalised. Like refused entry to everything and not allowed to travel
You do realise you can still catch and sodas the virus don’t youHmm. To ensure you don’t do this please never go out again and wear a mask at all times, especially when driving alone in your carWink
Suzi888 · 16/07/2021 04:26

*spread

Lucidas · 16/07/2021 04:30

@astraaurelis

Sorry.. just wanting to make sure I understand this thread correctly? Are you saying that if someone makes a personal decision to not inject themselves with a vaccine which is still in trial and not yet classified as proven safe then they should be punished?

Please, i'd LOVE to hear you elaborate further...

Umm yes, they can expect to face restrictions on everything from travel to isolation rules. You know this is already coming into effect?

People who are unvaccinated are more likely to both catch and transmit the virus and have higher viral loads.

Lucidas · 16/07/2021 04:31

You do realise you can still catch and sodas the virus don’t you

Less likely to do so. It’s a reduction in probability. I’m baffled that people still can’t grasp this.

Parker231 · 16/07/2021 04:56

amp.france24.com/en/europe/20210713-covid-19-jab-bookings-surge-in-france-as-macron-announces-new-restrictions-for-the-unvaccinated

France are bringing in more restrictions for those not vaccinated

Ayalight · 16/07/2021 05:49

@Serenschintte

1. the vaccinations are still in the testing phase.
  1. you are posing more of a risk to them in theory as you can still get Covid despite being vaccinated
  2. meet then and socially distance, thus reducing your risk
  3. all life’s activities have risk attached - crossing the road, dealing with electricity etc. Covid is a new risk. Not that high of a risk for the majority. Sadly a big risk for a minority of people.
This!

I'm being cautious. I'm currently breastfeeding and plan to have children in the future. Why would I take a gamble on my health on a very new vaccine just cause the government tells me so? No, thank you! I still have a fulfilling life to live.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 16/07/2021 05:55

@Tinpotspectator

One of the very unpleasant things about a lot of the refusers is that they are openly saying they will have it if it helps them personally eg to go on holiday. Lovely!
I only had the vaccine for that reason.

Do people really ask all their friends and family if they've had the vaccine? I don't.

newmummy21 · 16/07/2021 06:05

@Fthisshitimdone

I feel like I want them penalised. Like refused entry to everything and not allowed to travel

😳 I hate what COVID has done to people's minds. Insane.

Howcanthisbe123 · 16/07/2021 06:08

You sound very narrow minded for someone who is supposed to be a adult

saleorbouy · 16/07/2021 06:22

If you think that the vaccine is effective (probably the reason you had it) and offers you protection from the virus then why are you worried.
You will likely encounter many unvaccinated people in your daily routines so why selectively loose friends over it?

GalaxyGirl24 · 16/07/2021 06:33

Not everyone is happy to take medicines/vaccines that haven't been rigorously tested with years of longitudinal research - like most other vaccines have now.

I don't want it yet, I don't think I'm special though? I'm just cautious.

If you're vaccinated and you believe the vaccine will protect you, why are you concerned?

catinthewindow · 16/07/2021 06:36

My feelings are that we need a certain level of vaccination to stop this and protect the vulnerable. Statistically for most healthy people under 50 they don’t need the vaccine for them (although there’s still a tiny risk of serious complications or death). But as a population we need a high level of vaccination in this group. We need people to put others first and go get vaccinated.

Some people won’t be able to be vaccinated. That’s very different to those with no real reason.

Lots of younger people are having side effects but still getting vaccinated because it protects those who would have much worse outcomes … and let’s face it, let’s us get back to ‘normal’.

So yes I feel some people are letting others take the weight of these side effects / inconvenience of being vaccinated / whatever potential tiny theoretical future risk there might be when they could play a role .

It’s the vaccine equivalent of not chipping in for petrol when you could afford it. And that’s what I’m uncomfortable with. Not those who genuinely can’t have it for other reasons.

Nengineer · 16/07/2021 06:39

I think it depends. If we are talking Piers Corben, absolutely. If it's someone who personally feels they need more information and isn't a conspiracy nut, slightly different. But the smug covidoots, agree they can piss off. They are just loons.

Whinginadeville · 16/07/2021 06:42

I am actively avoiding the one friend I have who has chosen not to have the vaccine I have a pregnant family member who can't have it and don't want to put her at risk or offend my friend so I'm avoiding. My friend is asking so I think she may have guessed I do feel she's being selfish but I'm trying to live by the You do You mantra and not judge.

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