To think my neighbour is an inconsiderate prick!

[EpsomQ]

Hi. Just a bit of background. Me and my dh had to sell our first home a few years back when dh was unexpectedly made redundant. He found another job eventually and we managed to get out of debt (completely) that we accumulated whist dh was out of work. We weren’t able to get back on to the property ladder so we moved into a lovely private rented house with our 2dc. We’d have happily stayed there as it was a nice albeit small house with lovely neighbours however our landlord had to sell due to her divorce.

After waiting around 3 months and being on the verge of homelessness the council offered us a house. We were so relieved and happy especially since the house didn’t need a lot of work doing to it and it was in walking distance to both of our dd’s schools. We got to work decorating carpeting etc and we made it into a lovely home. The street itself is actually very pretty visually not what you’d usually expect of a council estate. It has lots of greenery a place for kids to play and a community allotment. The neighbours surrounding us on the whole are lovely and the older kids who play out seem well behaved. So you can understand my disappointment considering all this that our only neighbour attached to us is a bloody nightmare.

He spends all day smoking weed to the point we have to keep our windows closed even in the warm weather as I started to lose count of how many times I walked into my living room and smelled it. My 13 year old daughter’s room is next to his and at night she can’t keep her window open as he smokes weed in his room. He usually smoke
It in the back garden and it wafts into our garden but the last few days I’ve come home from work to find him stood on his front door step puffing away as casual as anything. AIBU to think he is an arrogant hard faced prick? I’m currently trying to decide how best to handle it as I’m not sure. Dh said he will go and speak to him but we have no idea how he will react. The other option is phoning the police but I don’t know what they would do. The guy is around
19/20 lives with his mum and dad who clearly don’t mind him smoking it. The mum and dad also have a daughter who is I’d say around 11/12 years old. What would you do in my situation? Fwiw I know there are more serious things to worry about but the smell of weed makes me feel sick and my teenage daughter feels the same.

Report to the council. Their house may be council owned. Keep reporting daily. Can't really ask him to smoke it elsewhere, where would he go to smoke it so it doesn't waft in your house?

There are reams of threads on this. You can report to the council but it's not likely they'll do much even if you report it daily. Swap rooms, get fans in the house, burn incense.

report to your tenancy officer with dates and times, put it to them to stop and its harmful for your dc.

if they don't do anything then contact your local councillor
then your MP

You don't like him smoking indoors, understandable. You don't like him smoking in the back garden because it might waft into yours, and you don't like him smoking out front because it's arrogant. Would you feel the same way if it was "just" tobacco, which is legal? Where would you suggest he smoke?

Have you considered moving? If you would have stayed in the original house but for the landlord selling it, sounds like you can afford to rent privately as you’d still be doing that today if the landlord’s marriage hadn’t fallen apart.

@HirplesWithHaggis

You don't like him smoking indoors, understandable. You don't like him smoking in the back garden because it might waft into yours, and you don't like him smoking out front because it's arrogant. Would you feel the same way if it was "just" tobacco, which is legal? Where would you suggest he smoke?

This is MN. NO smoking. Ever.

Hi. We can’t move as we can’t go back into private renting again. We can’t really swap rooms either due to space and layout. I burn candles have those plug air wick scent things etc. Fwiw I smoke (cigarettes) but I smoke inside my shed/dh’s man cave as it’s a large area with a sofa and it means I don’t risk annoy my neighbours who I actually like.

If He smokes it in his garden that would be better. I don’t spend a lot of time in my garden so i only smell it when i’m out there hanging the washing out. Smoking it blatantly on the front door step and my kids seeing it is not ok.

Report it to the council, assuming he's a tenant.

It wouldn't really bother me, to be honest. You sound as if you have landed on your feet with your house, and a weed smoking neighbour isn't that much of an issue in the grand scheme of things.

If he's 19/20, he'll be moving out within a few years, if not sooner. I'd put up with it, but then again, I prefer to remain on good terms with the neighbours and not create a drama when there need not be one.

My advice would be just put up with it. It'll pass. If you report relations will sour. Things could well get worse.

If they are not noisy, aggressive, dirty, violent and all the other things that nightmare neighbours can be I think I'd put up with it. But up to you. If it's really bugging you you'll do what you need to.

Have you tried a polite chat with him? Explain that you really hate the stink of weed and could he smoke at the back of his garden, rather than near your windows? Appeal to his conscience, say the smell is going in your DD's room and it's not healthy for her. Ya never know, it might just be a wake up call he needs.

So he smokes it in his own bedroom, in his own back garden, and on his own front doorstep? Well then I am not sure that there is anything you can do about him enjoying his own home except ask nicely whether he could avoid those places where it drifts into your house.
I wouldn't worry about your dd seeing him smoking it as she'll just assume it's cigarettes, like you, don't she?

Yes a polite chat. Otherwise you’ll sour neighbourly relations. He won’t be there forever.

My dh has said he’ll speak to him no problem but I don’t think it’ll make any difference. If it wasn’t for the fact I have dc I could (maybe) grin and bear it but why should they have to smell it? My dd’s room is boiling even with her fan and it’s one of this powerful dyson fans. She should be able to have her windows open in the summer without the smell of weed drifting in. I was mortified the other day when my mum brought my nan round as when they left my hall way reeked of it.

If He smokes it in his garden that would be better

"she can’t keep her window open as he smokes weed in his room. He usually smoke It in the back garden and it wafts into our garden but the last few days I’ve come home from work to find him stood on his front door step "

I would just leave it tbh. Its a horrible smell, but bad neighbour relations would be worse.

Dont assume this is forever. He may give up, move out etc etc.

Personally? I wouldn't say anything to him, but I would report to Crimestoppers and the council.

It’s easy to say just leave it when it’s not you having to deal with it every day. I just can’t get over the cheek of him. Plus the fact there is a child who lives in their house. Is that ok?

Maybe the child that lives in there house doesn't mind the smell

*their house, of course.

No, it’s definitely weed, I know that ransom smell anywhere. If you actually google cannabis it clearly states it isn’t legal to smoke it inside your own home. I know the police are more interested in people who deal it but he could be doing that too. The point is though I don’t care what people do as long as it doesn’t affect me and my family but it is affecting us and I don’t see why we should have to put up with it.

Maybe the child doesn’t mind the smell are you serious? It’s illegal to smoke it inside your home even when you don’t have kids.

Calm down. Your whole post was about the smell of it. Then you said you were thinking of the child that lived there.

I said maybe the smell doesn't bother them.

My next door neighbours son smokes weed in the garden. Really smelly skunk. I've learned to live with it. Apart from this, they are very nice neighbours. Quiet, polite and friendly. Things could be a lot worse.

Ever since I decided to stop being annoyed by it, I smell it less and less. It was far more of a problem when I was focusing on it.