Office colleague not contributing

[BlueVixen]

AIBU in thinking the one person in our small office who didn't contribute towards a box of chocolates and a card for the cleaner shouldn't sign the birthday card. I suggested it in the office today and immediately two colleagues thought it was a good idea an put £2 in the 'pot'. Ended up with £8 (including my contribution). Enough to by a box of chocolates, a card and some wrapping paper. Showing a bit of appreciation. The cleaner is lovely. She cleans a whole building, not just our space, and is cheerful and personable and works hard. The colleague who didn't stump up £2 is not hard up. She and I are both pretty new in the office. She left the office whilst we were talking about it. I'm not sure what to do. Small problem - in the scheme of things but ........

It's a little petty

. She left the office whilst we were talking about it
So does she know you did it?....

How petty. Really OP? [hmm

She’s tight… I’m petty to op and would say well you couldn’t put in £2 so why sign it

YABU. I can’t stand the expectation that you’ll contribute to collections in offices often for colleagues you don’t know that well. One bonus in working from home. That being said my work didn’t do them for birthdays unless it was a big one.

You don't contribute, you don't sign the card.

Themz da rulez

I agree with you op £2.00 towards a card/pressie and wrapping is nothing at all.

I think if she didn't want to contribute then why should she sign the card?

I don't think it's petty, it's just a reflection of who the card and gift is actually from but then £8 between four or five of you isn't much anyway

Why all or nothing? At my workplace everyone signs a card, they can cost next to nothing. If there is a collection for someone then an envelope will go around with the card for anyone to contribute if they want.

Does it possibly indicate contempt or lack of appreciation for jobs considered menial? I hope not.

Many people simply have a principle of not donating, because the one-off little collection for the cleaner so often snowballs into weekly collections for birthdays, weddings, new babies, promotions and so on, with ever-greater amounts requested or expected. So whilst declining to give £2 now for the cleaner might seem petty, I do sort of understand why some people have a hard line about it.

@ComtesseDeSpair

Many people simply have a principle of not donating, because the one-off little collection for the cleaner so often snowballs into weekly collections for birthdays, weddings, new babies, promotions and so on, with ever-greater amounts requested or expected. So whilst declining to give £2 now for the cleaner might seem petty, I do sort of understand why some people have a hard line about it.

And that's fine but doesn't answer the question about whether they should sign the card.

You sign the card to wish someone a happy birthday, a collection is if you want to contribute to a present as well. They are separate things.

And signing your name in a card, which the cleaner will read and feel pleased at, shouldn’t be connected to donating. Because Ultimately, the person affected is the recipient not the giver.

I used to work in an office like this. Someone went round with a list of names of who had contributed and would only let them sign the card

Yes, she definitely knew what the conversation was about, she just left before others opened their wallets/purses. I seem to have divided MN! :} And it's no 'biggy', I was just interested what you all thought. To be clear, I wouldn't sign a card I hadn't contributed for.

She can sign the card, no need to take a sweet message away from the cleaner because she didn't chip in for a box of lindt.

How do you know your colleague is not strapped for cash OP?
Do you know what her household income and outgoings are?
Maybe she only brings enough cash to work for her lunch/taxi fare/bus fare or whatever.
Perhaps she's in a financially abusive relationship and has been given her "allowance" for the day/week?

I never take cash to work, did she have any ?

How do you know she can afford it? My husband and I are struggling a bit with money at the moment but I don't go round discussing it with my colleagues.
Unless you know all her ingoings and outgoings you don't know what her situation is.
I'd let her sign because if you don't the cleaner might think this woman doesn't like her which may not be the case at all.
So yes YABU and very petty.

We are an office of only six in a building of many departments. There won't be a constant stream of donation requests but (most of us in the office) felt the cleaner gets scant recognition and wanted to let her know we appreciated her. It's never going to be a weekly event.

Does she even want to sign the card?
Has she asked to sign the card?
Will you ask her to sign the card?
Has she already signed the card?

If I don’t contribute I don’t sign the card.

A birthday card for the office cleaner. How does anybody even know when her birthday is. But if your colleague doesn't contribute then she shouldn't sign the card. It's a bit over the top IMHO.

She has the funds. She's about to purchase a £30k car but, I have listened and understood it's more about the cleaner's feelings than the none payment of one person. Ta.

Also, is this a random act just to thank her or is she leaving?