Thoughts on baby in nursery at 8 months?

[babyblues21]

Just that really. My baby will be in nursery from this age and I'm struggling with the idea. Any experiences, either positive or negative? Would a childminder be a better option at this age so my baby has more 1:1 care?

@Pawsin

I have worked in EY for years, and been to many many nurseries. Some brilliant, some awful. It's impossible to judge them as a whole as they're all just so different, like the way you couldn't judge all restaurants as a whole. And I'm sure childminders are the same.

I think the key thing people need to remember is that with a 1:3 ratio with babies it is never going to be the same level of care that a mum to one baby provides. Even with the most lovely, attentive nursery practitioners if all 3 babies are crying/wanting different things at once it's impossible to immediately meet all their needs.

I'd be asking them questions like what is their staff turnover like, ensuring they have a good mix of ages of staff (mostly teenagers would avoid personally), how often they rotate toys, what methods they use to put babies to sleep, what they're behaviour policy is like/how they deal with challenging behaviour, etc. I also think it's a good idea when having a visit to ask random questions to the staff, such as 'what's the youngest child you have at the moment' or 'what's your topic/planning based on this week'. The reaction will probably tell you more than the actual answer, and how well they actually know the children/are engaged with what's going on.

Thanks this is useful

@thebemusedone

I had bad PND and was suspicious and paranoid about everyone. In my twisted view at the time, no one could look after my DS like me and he couldn’t possibly be safe without me there so I get all of your worries and more. It only served to make me more exhausted constantly being on edge and being the only one doing for him.

Thankfully I recovered to go back to work which coincided with him being about 9 months. Going back to work helped my recovery too as it went from lockdown, stuck in the house with a baby, who, as amazing as he is, they don’t give you a great deal back (!) to having others to talk to and some outside baby world mental stimulation.

It has been a really lovely age - he settled so well that on his first trial visit, they suggested we could leave the room as he was so happy. He’s never ever cried going in and always holds out his hands to them at drop off time. When we pick him up, he will rush to the door, bang on the door shouting for us and greet us with the most beautiful, huge smile - they don’t forget who you are, as much as I worried about that too!

I hope you make a decision that feels right for you and your family ❤️

Thank you. I do have similar worries to be honest, about being the only person who can properly take care of my baby 😥

@babyblues21

Even meal times where staff should've been paying a lot of attention to them were rushed and the babies weren't given enough time to finish their food or even milk at times.

😱 I seriously hope this nursery isn't running anymore

It still is, and the staff are still there and the babies are likely still treated the same. Reporting staff for things like this did nothing, there was always an excuse as to why they'd do things like not feed the babies properly or not change them often enough.

@Ahnowcomon yeah, I agree with you. Sahp are criticised so much on here 😕
I am writing my dissertation right now for my master, have a 1 year old, took his first 11 months off, now his dad is off with paternity until 14 months and then I plan to take 2 years to stay at home with him before applying for my PhD. You can be a sahp and still have enjoyable aspects of your life