AIBU to think you don't change your baby's nappy on a cafe table?

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This isn't a reverse before I start. Just been for coffee with a friend of mine and a couple of local mums I'd not met before. We were in a cafe with baby change facilities and yet after we'd finished our food, she moved the plates to one side, plonked the baby on a blanket and changed her nappy on the table....while we were still drinking our coffee!

AIBU for thinking that's gross? If there wasn't a baby change facility it might be different although I still think doing it like this would be gross, but there was and it was open as I used it for DS.

I mentioned it to my friend on the way back and she said she'd done it before too because it was easier. She thought it was hilarious that I was so grossed out by it.

So AIBU?

How disgusting! I am VOMITING she should be BANNED from that cafe. Eugh people these days have no manners. If I were there i would have complained!

Revolting. I had friends like this when DS was small.

They'd also change stinking nappies on my settee if they were round for coffee, rather than using the bathroom offered where there was water for handwashing and so on

How on earth did the mother manage this without either cafe staff or her own companions objecting?

What did you say to try & stop her OP?

@HeyDemonsItsYaGirl

Most people are disgusted by human excrement around food or food preparation areas, FeckingPuddleDuck. There's nothing OTT about it.

OP didn't say whether it was a poo or not. As I say, either way I wouldn't do it myself but I couldn't get that worked up about someone changing a wet nappy on a changing mat personally.

I'd probably feel differently if it's confirmed to be a stinking great shit that was changed on the table but otherwise I can't get that upset about it.

@FeckingPuddleDuck

So you’ve got no problem with eating off a table that an adult urinated on? Or if someone sat at the table with urine on their clothes?

🤮

@PussGirl

Revolting. I had friends like this when DS was small.

They'd also change stinking nappies on my settee if they were round for coffee, rather than using the bathroom offered where there was water for handwashing and so on

Yesss this was my other thought about OP's friend not going to the baby change. Surely after changing a nappy you want to be washing your hands yourself as well?

one family changed the baby on the table outside and then left the dirty nappy, not even in a nappy sack, in the empty dessert bowl.

This is one of the most disgusting things I've ever read. Some people are just awful.

Crowded shopping centre, crowded bus, busy bus depot. A massive line of passengers board the bus.

Two women get on and sit on the high side seats.

One proceeds to change her toddlers nappy on her lap and dump the used nappy in the basket thing for shopping bags.

The bus was stuck in the station for ages.

It was a baking hot day and the inside of the bus was even hotter than outside, the smell could only be described as incredible.

The shopping centre was full of baby changing facilities both in the malls and individual shops.

Why wait till you're on the bus. Lazy and gross.

It's disgusting to make anyone else smell your child's shit in public places that are not toilets or changing facilities. Use a freaking toilet or the outdoors.

Outside of the mn echo chamber

It's not necessary to be an MN poster to understand basic H&S regulations. Or to have basic courtesy toward 1) other customers & 2) the proprietor's trading licence.

I mentioned it to my friend on the way back and she said she'd done it before too because it was easier. She thought it was hilarious that I was so grossed out by it.

It's just grim.

Totally gross. How anyone can think that is acceptable is beyond me.

Oh no that’s grim. I have a 6 month old and have had to resort to changing her in the boot of my car and inside her pram (outside) due to covid and no facilities available. No way would I do it within a cafe, and definitely not on a table people eat off of!

Gross a table that anyone else is going to eat off is never a place to change a nappy .

[quote Nocutenamesleft]@FeckingPuddleDuck

So you’ve got no problem with eating off a table that an adult urinated on? Or if someone sat at the table with urine on their clothes?[/quote]
Did the baby urinate on the table? Or was a blanket put down and the baby changed on to

I hate this. I even hated it when my DC were tiny and one parent would change their baby's nappy sitting right next to someone else on a sofa - grim, grim, grim!

@FeckingPuddleDuck It's hard to diagnose your species whether you are a swamp creature,a troll,or just plain ignorant of hygiene but your blase' attitude really is troubling-take a Microbiology course and learn something new. A restaurant can get shut down if the next party at the table sat down and ate and picked up e.coli and became seriously ill or died and it got traced back to the business! You do realize fecal matter can and does transmit deadly diseases!? And why so? Mom too lazy to walk 50 feet to the toilet?

On top of that*? Pressed send too soon.

If the baby actually urinated on the table then obviously that's not okay. But I don't think that's the same thing at all.

[quote EKGEMS]@FeckingPuddleDuck It's hard to diagnose your species whether you are a swamp creature,a troll,or just plain ignorant of hygiene but your blase' attitude really is troubling-take a Microbiology course and learn something new. A restaurant can get shut down if the next party at the table sat down and ate and picked up e.coli and became seriously ill or died and it got traced back to the business! You do realize fecal matter can and does transmit deadly diseases!? And why so? Mom too lazy to walk 50 feet to the toilet? [/quote]
I said several times it's not something I'd do myself.

I just wouldn't be crying about it hours later if I saw someone else do it or screeching about speaking to management 🤷‍♀️

I'd actually be gagging vs crying about it. The OP should reinforce to the Mum that IF they ever meet for a meal again that what she did isn't on and won't be tolerated.

And I don't think quickly changing a wet nappy on top of a blanket is the same as changing one full of shit and leaving the dirty nappy in a dessert bowl. Neither are things I'd do myself but I don't think they are the same.

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Probably others like me who have seen the rest of the thread calling us 'grim' 'disgusting' 'lazy' and 'revolting' and decided they'd rather not sign up for the insults.

Outside of the mn echo chamber I assure you that IRL I know plenty of others who have or would do this. But I'm sure someone will be along in a minute to say I must hang around with other 'animals' who have been 'dragged up'.

Tables get cleaned between customers and if you think changing a newnborn's nappy (on a mat no less!) is gruesome you'd probably not be pleased to learn of the germs that fester in ballpools etc at softplays!

Anyway I'm bowing out now since this thread wasn't actually about me and I was only giving my personal opinion and experience (not realising it was the wrong one, obviously! How silly of me!)

It is disgusting, lazy and grim. And yes. Unfortunately you are right that irl there are thousands of people doing this. Doesn't make it right.

I don't understand how you can not realise that changing baby on a table is wrong.

I suspect it is as a PP said, parents get so used to dealing with their children's nappies etc, that they lose sight of the impact of it and what is and isn't acceptable. I'm sure many parents can think of examples of this (not necessarily just nappy related) if they are honest. I know I've been guilty of it. Not changing on tables or anything, but not always going into a separate room in grandparents houses etc.

Well can see easily why things like covid, norovirus etc spread so easily from this thread can't we? Changing diapers on tables then eating from said table, not washing hands after changing diapers. These people may as well eat off of toilets. 🤮

It’s disgusting. If you can’t see anything wrong in this then you are utterly selfish.

Oh, that is vile, YANBU. The poor staff there.

I used to work retail and lost count of the number of times I had to ask people to stop doing diaper changes in the middle of the shop, including on the benches outside the changing rooms or in a pram in the middle of an aisle. We also had used nappies left everywhere, inside and outside the shop.

Some people just have no shame or dignity.