DD wants boob Job

[Neapolitanicecream]

DD is 19 years old, very upset at being flat chested and is wanting implants. She is pretty but is only focusing on this issue she can’t afford it anyway, but is thinking of a loan cries about it. Any advice WWYD ?

Please let her do it if she's crying about it.

Oh no, not crying!

Or get her some counselling, allow her to learn how to live with not being perfect and improve her self esteem?

@GerryManderson

Some of us take longer to become womanly.

I don't want to be an asshole but you shouldn't really equate being womanly with having big breasts, that's just feeding this kind of thing

@Cam2020

Please let her do it if she's crying about it.

Oh no, not crying!

Or get her some counselling, allow her to learn how to live with not being perfect and improve her self esteem?

Indeed, God forbid we shouldn't be 100% happy all the time....and if we're not well there's a surgery for that. I find this thread utterly depressing

I can understand how she feels, having been a very under-endowed teen - never more than a 34A - I would have given anything for a cleavage! At the time surgery would have been out of the ? though.

However my lovely dh was never bothered and TBH after my first baby I was relieved not to have bigger boobs - they were like hot concrete footballs anyway in the few days afterwards - God knows what a 36C would have been like. I had no trouble BF-ing.

Two good friends of mine have whoppers and for various reasons - backache, difficulty getting clothes that fit properly etc., have often said they wished they had mine instead.

Also, a school friend who was both pretty and very well endowed, used to say to me, ‘At least if a bloke asks you out, it’s because he likes you. With me, I know it’s so often because they can’t wait to get their hands on my boobs - it’s usually the first thing they look at - not my face.’

If it were my daughter I would definitely advise against it. I had small breasts, less than 34aa and i was self conscious too at that age but in my 20's and 30's I started to love my 'breasticles' more and more. I think having small brests has been an asset to me despite my initial dislike of them. I am sporty and worked and lived in male dominated environments. Having small boobs I have never had to think about this. I have also lived in foreign countries and I'm very lucky that finding correct sized underwear or even going without in the heat has never been an issue. Now I'm 40+ years old and breastfeeding my size is almost 36b. I know it's common to have surgery but I would really try to boost her confidence in other ways, experiment with different padded and push up bras and hold off making any decisions.

I am very against this mainly due to her age! 19 is far too young to be considering a boob job. All girls develop into women at different speeds. I was quite flat as a teenager but my boobs had a growth spurt in my early 20s and I am currently a 32ff. Maybe she will get lucky and have a late growth spurt but regardless she should definitely wait a few years before considering this!!

Are these helping, OP?

I would just make vague placating noises about hiw that must be harsld for her and you love her no matter what.

Ive not been in her situation but i really feel sad that someone like your daughter, who is probabpy a fantastic person, feels sad because she worries her value ia in how she looks i.e. a man wont fancy her, she wont fill out a top etc.

At 19 I was very flat chested and would have liked a boob job. Three years later I was an E cup, I am now a G cup and would love them to be smaller.

I haven't even had children, just got older. I have put on weight now, but between being an A at 18 and an E at 22 I was still very slim.

She probably hasn't finished maturing so I would be really cautious. Wonderbras and Chicken fillets can do wonders!

I understand we all have hang ups about our bodies.

From someone on the opposite side of the boob spectrum I have felt awful trying to find a bridesmaid dress. The other girls all have nice little perky boobs that don’t alter how clothing lies, they look great in some of the plunging necklines and backless satin spaghetti strap things. I meanwhile look like I’m going to a pornstar convention as my mother informed me.

There is also the upkeep- it’s not just a one off, it’s over and over.

I had surgery on some veins and a mole removed as a teenager- years later the scarring from these operations are some of the biggest hang ups I have about my body. I wish now I’d lived with what I had.

From the age of 15 to about 20 I was OBSESSED with getting a boob job, I researched doctors & opened a savings account & had a monthly amount going straight from my account when I got paid. Every time I mentioned it my mum would roll her eyes & tell me I was being ridiculous & I didn't need it, when I was about 21 I realised she was right & spent the money on a holiday to New York instead
I think teenagers are always insecure about something

Difficult as boob jobs are not without risks plus the expense as she will likely need them done again. A friend has had 3 now after having them first done at 20.

So OP never returned to her own thread? What a waste of time.

I wanted a boob job in my 20s, then after dc they stayed big. I want them smaller now!

I do think it's sad that young women are under so much pressure to "fix" things.

I'm always suspicious of a fake post when OP doesn't return, especially with a subject such as this.

Its pretty rude if nothing else

Trouble is they don’t last forever. I’ve got implants, they’re 11 years old and I’ve got capsular contracture on the left. The implant has moved up due to scar tissue and now it’s solid and not all squashy like the right. I can’t afford to get it sorted out yet. I can’t lift my left arm without it being painful as the skin pulls. I loved them but never really thought about having to get them re-done.

I would support her

When I was 17 I wanted one and my mum supported me and said that if by 18 I still wanted one she would help pay for it

I had eventually changed my mind and now I’m 35 I am glad I didn’t have it

She's still very young and if she's very thin she may fill out in her 20s - I was a B cup at her age, then a D cup in my mid 20s.

I would advise her to wait 5 years, during which time she can save up for the op. The hassle of getting the implants changed every 10 years or so is also something to factor in, along with the risks and costs. Chances are if you offer to pay for the op now she might jump at the chance, but I'm unsure that you'd be doing her any favours.

Doubt OP is even reading anymore tbh

I had an infection in one of mine.

I read every review before I chose my surgeon. Every single one.

I had an infection and They didn't handle it very well. The aftercare was horrific.

I told them I had an infection, they argued I didn't without even seeing me.
I had to threaten to turn up and wait in the waiting room and I said I would tell every single person why I was there and that they had refused to see me.

They saw me that night, gave me antibiotics. This was on a Friday. Went back Monday and I ended up with a drain stitched into me for six weeks. Implant was saved but it was awful.

My DH said about five mugs worth of shit just flew out of me when he nicked the stitch line to insert the drip.

The surgeon was knuckles deep pulling stuff out of me. My DH is convinced they left something in there which caused the infection. Can't prove it.

Over the course of the next six weeks, at one point I could see the implant where the wound wasn't knitting together.

I have scarring under the breast where it folds.

Thankfully all ok now but fucking hell to think I opted for that surgery!

Support her in having one. I was the same at her age, no one else can understand the lack of confidence and embarrassment it can cause a person if they don’t have the same issue. My body was completely out of proportion because of my lack of breasts and I was so self conscious that it ruined my teens.

I had mine done at 18 and now mid 30’s after 2 pregnancy’s and yo-yo dieting, they have sagged quite a lot but I’m still nowhere near as unhappy as I was as a teen and I’ve never once regretted it.

@namcybotwinbloom that’s horrific! Are they out now and are you ok?

@belimoo

This thread is so depressing. I cannot believe the replies.

This is major surgery with lots of potential complications and is certain to impact for the rest of her life in terms of repeat surgeries and other issues.

And for what? Why does she want this? Because our society makes her think that being as sexy as possible is her main goal in life and worth risking her health for. Not to mention spending a load of money on it.

And if she doesn't do it you can guarantee she'll still have no shortage of suitors because men actually aren't that picky when it comes down to it.

I'm not meaning to criticise your daughter or anyone else who goes down this path but I just wish we lived in a world where this was seen as the madness it is.

This^.

Also, on a more mundane level, I had no idea people are still getting boob jobs. What with all the Elliot Page type breast removal and breast binding among the young, I thought it was only porn stars and trans women who were getting breast implants now.