DH thinks this is disgusting

[ScottsThots]

Feel free to absolutely let me have it but me out please.
We live in a house with a downstairs toilet/bathroom which is the absolute bane of my existence 🙄
I'm 33 weeks pregnant so I feel like I need to have a wee basically every half hour these days. I've been managing going downstairs every night when I wake up for the past few months but I've reached the end of my tether. I just can't do it anymore 😭😭 My back aches, my bump is in the way, I'm exhausted and nauseated and I'm just ready to have baby already 😑
I need multiple trips to the toilet and I just can handle going downstairs that many times in one night.

So yes I have bought myself a little travel potty with a lid which I use. 🙈🙈🙈
It's out on the landing so not in our bedroom and I empty it and clean it first thing in the morning I swear!

It's made such a difference to me but DH thinks it's absolutely disgusting.
I know he has every right to think that but what would you do in my shoes 😅 AIBU?

I also nearly tripped on the stairs a few times because I'm half asleep going down them.
We're currently house hunting and definitely won't be making the same mistake going for downstairs loo.

I also think that urine is actually sterile, Ghandii himself used to drink some of his own pee every day. Nit something I would recommend but when people are talking about germs etc, no, urine is sterile.

Not

Not disgusting. Tell him to shut up

I go a lot in the night and I’m not even pregnant 😂 this would kill me. I don’t blame you at all

Tell him that your little "pot" is far less disgusting than you piddling a trail all the way down the stairs, or him finding you sprawled at the bottom of them when he gets up in the morning. Men have no clue.

No uterus no opinion! I did similar when I was heavily pregnant, you gotta do what you gotta do!
Hope everything goes really well xxx

So sorry op. Your dh should be more supportive. If he finds it so disgusting he could always volunteer to run up and downstairs to empty it.

And BTW (this really is a bit gross tbh) after my c section, I had to have my urine output monitored, which meant I had to pee in to a metal pan thing at the hospital. The only problem was that I could barely walk, never mind lower myself up and down easily, and I was passing blood clots, so my husband not only had to support me to walk to the bathroom and sit down, he was also witness to all the yuckiness, but he was still really kind and matter of fact about it, and behaved as it was all perfectly normal and fine, and he never commented or made me feel worse than I already did as it was so undignified. In fact we now look back on that moment as a time when we lost most of our inhibitions with one another and got much closer. He is not good with blood either! So you need to prepare your dh for the fact that a bit of urine is nothing in the scheme of things.

Good luck with the birth op, I hope your dh steps up when it matters and treats you well

I know exactly what I’d be telling him & the second word would be off!
My husband, who was fit and healthy up until a couple of months ago has had to have bladder surgery and a permanent catheter fitted which means attaching to a 2litre night bag at the side of our bed every night forever. Do I complain about how gross and disgusting it is? No, it could so easily be any one of us & your husband needs to grow up & be grateful he’s not going through any of it!

absolutely fine just a form of problem-solving.

@Member869894

I cant help thinking that going downstairs shouldn't be that hard - you're pregnant not ill

But during the last couple of months your centre of balance is off, you can have back problems, your breathing is sometimes restricted and you can be light headed or nauseous. Its not a good idea to be climbing stairs in those circumstances, especially when half asleep. Also, if you live in an old house, the stairs can be steep.

I’ve resorted to sleeping on the sofa most nights as the living room is closer to the toilet than the bedroom is.

Not too many moons ago a chamber pot eas totally normal

I’m shocked he thinks it’s disgusting! You are carrying his child ffs, he sounds very childish, what happens then when he’s going to be dealing with a child in nappies wee / poo vomit, he’s going to have a wake up call,

Potty is a good idea.

If DH was half a man he would insist on emptying it for you and returning it, so you don;t have to keep negotiating the stairs in late pregnancy.,

Climb into bed in a sexy camisole and a huge giant adult in continence nappy and see if he prefers that. (If he does, run for the hills).

You go for it ... and perhaps save it for your DH if/when he develops prostate problems... likely he will thank you for it then

What time does he leave for work?
Tell him you're going to bring back that ye olde tradition of emptying
your piss pot out of the window in the mornings.

Fantastic idea! Yes he's being unreasonable of course. That's what people used to use before indoor bathrooms. Not disgusting at all, it's only wee for goodness sake and cleaned daily.

Gosh he's a twat isn't he. How is he going to cope with changing nappies, let alone being present at the birth

Get a commode. Balancing a potty is not ideal. Your DH can do one.

Weeing is not gross. He’d better brace himself for childbirth.

Personally I would just move bed downstairs (if its possible). Indeed if you have a section you might be there anyway. Borrow a single bed if theres not much room downstairs.

[quote StardewMelons]@roobicoobi Again, I wasn't comparing reasons behind using a potty. Imagine being a user of a commode scrolling through this thread where there is comment after comment saying "gross" to the action of using a potty. Do you not see how that might be a bit hurtful/insensitive? Yes I know a disabled person might have no choice in the matter and OP does have a choice, it was not at all what I was saying.[/quote]
I think it is more that choosing to do it if you are capable of getting to a bathroom is gross. I mean there is nothing gross about changing a baby but if your perfectly healthy 10 year old just couldn't be bothered to go to the bathroom that would be gross, your disabled child needing to use a commode isn't gross.

As a man and recently new father, I absolutely have to say, when you’re carrying his child, anything goes, absolutely whatever makes your incredible journey that tiny bit more comfortable is not disgusting! Good wishes for both you and baby

It's not gross, he hasn't carried a baby is opinion is void OP