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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

husband got back at half 5 this morning

941 replies

bubblegum02 · 19/06/2021 07:39

hello,

based on some of the threads on here, I'm assuming I'm going to get a lot of kill joy comments and the fact it's the euros too but I am annoyed.

my partner said he was going for a "couple" last night. I am 4 months pregnant and we have a one year old. I went to bed at about 10 and heard him come in. when I looked at the time, expecting it to be about half 11 as the pubs round here are still shutting earlier than usual it was half 5!

what has pissed me off about this is, one year old has woken up at 7, we went down about half 7 and of course, he is totally dead to the world. he has slept in our spare room downstairs which is something I suppose.

he was meant to be looking after the one year old for me whilst I go out for lunch today but he isnt responding to me at all. or the one year old.

he was out all day for the game last sunday too, was out pretty much the whole of the bank holiday and last Saturday too.

I'm getting fed up now, I'm not going to be able to leave the one year old with him, it is like he is unconscious and I'm meant to be going at 11.

not cool - pre kids, it wouldnt of been an issue but think he needs to grow up a bit. not against having a bit of fun but rocking in at that time when you are supposed to be looking after your child the next day is taking the piss.

has ruined my day too now and he will inevitably be feeling very sorry for himself.

OP posts:
Sayonethingtypeanother · 22/06/2021 12:39

I read them. You are fine.

Fully laughing at the indignance.

I never said you weren’t allowed to respond but in doing so and using the terminology you did you were … argumentative.

It is what you say it is

I find some of the responses very goady and I question the motives of some of them but it is what it is. you put yourself out there when you post on AIBU.

And you put yourself out there.

I am not being argumentative or provocative or anything else. Merely copied down a response or two.

You haven’t been polite either.

But that’s me said my piece.

And I haven’t lost my cool.

Enjoy the rest of the football. I’m sure your DH will ⚽️

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 13:03

@Sayonethingtypeanother

I read them. You are fine.

Fully laughing at the indignance.

I never said you weren’t allowed to respond but in doing so and using the terminology you did you were … argumentative.

It is what you say it is

I find some of the responses very goady and I question the motives of some of them but it is what it is. you put yourself out there when you post on AIBU.

And you put yourself out there.

I am not being argumentative or provocative or anything else. Merely copied down a response or two.

You haven’t been polite either.

But that’s me said my piece.

And I haven’t lost my cool.

Enjoy the rest of the football. I’m sure your DH will ⚽️

Your entire motive by both the posts give you away I'm afraid - I don't think you need me to point out the irony in you accusing me of being arguementative especially with your closing statement and also the fact you offered exactly zero advice.

'enjoy the rest of the football. I'm sure your DH will'

I am sure we will too! England are through after all :)

TopBlogger · 22/06/2021 14:30

Why have you changed your username @bubblegum02 or is it a nc fail? You do realise people me will get confused now (and probably post responses to your OP and the updates till you turned into candy floss, as they wont read the updates!)

Poorlykitten · 22/06/2021 14:33

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 14:36

@TopBlogger

Why have you changed your username *@bubblegum02* or is it a nc fail? You do realise people me will get confused now (and probably post responses to your OP and the updates till you turned into candy floss, as they wont read the updates!)
Because I do not enjoy it when I respond to other threads and people search up my username and threads I have created (as happened to me this morning!)
Sayonethingtypeanother · 22/06/2021 14:48

Hope you don’t mean me poorlykitten

Not a troll. Been here years and years. More than I care to say (Did leave for about 6 months.but came back)

I was genuinely curious as to why the OP (under whatever name) didn’t think that some of her replies could be construed as argumentative or rude.

I didn’t once say that others hadn’t been rude.

I wasn’t the only one who noticed it.

But should you feel the need to report me - or others you seem to be trolls - go ahead kitten

Sayonethingtypeanother · 22/06/2021 14:49

You deem to be trolls.

Poorlykitten · 22/06/2021 14:53

Yes, I do mean you. I think you need to just chill out. Religiously going through the OP’s posts to try and prove she’s getting angry/argumentative is a bit odd, unnecessary and as if you are dying for a fight. Maybe step away from MN for a bit.

Sayonethingtypeanother · 22/06/2021 15:06

kitten

Not religiously. It was all there to read and took two minutes.

Also not dying for a fight. I can call out rudeness too.

You don’t know me but yet you are calling me a troll?

I’m fine where I am thank you. You don’t get to dictate what I post or when.

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 16:29

@Sayonethingtypeanother

kitten

Not religiously. It was all there to read and took two minutes.

Also not dying for a fight. I can call out rudeness too.

You don’t know me but yet you are calling me a troll?

I’m fine where I am thank you. You don’t get to dictate what I post or when.

to be fair, its a questionable motive. "call out rudeness" when others on here have been awful on this thread and I simply responded, probably not even on the same level, to their nastiness. Nothing in my responses were unecessary, I think it is strange you think I would simply accept the way I was spoken to and the things I was called, and not only accept them but be 'polite' back. Why?

Two of the responses you quoted was to a poster who commented no less than 6 times before I finally gave them an acknowledgement.

Yet you are coming on here to call me out on my rudeness? Not surprising people think that is odd or that you are possibly on here for less than stellar reasons.

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 16:30

I fully don't expect you to respond or have an answer for that but seriously, think about what your point is before you comment on things.

Sayonethingtypeanother · 22/06/2021 16:50

You stated that you weren’t argumentative.

I maintain you were.

I have never said that others weren’t rude or that you shouldn’t reply back.

But you did say you weren’t argumentative or rude. I think you were. I think some of your responses were unnecessary.

That is my point.

Seriously. Think about that. And I have not been rude or unkind in what I have said.

Merely an opinion.

I shan’t comment any further. My point is clear.

You just don’t like it.

And you have enough to deal with apparently.

Melsmith2000 · 22/06/2021 16:57

Possibly could be having an affair.

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 17:02

@Sayonethingtypeanother

You stated that you weren’t argumentative.

I maintain you were.

I have never said that others weren’t rude or that you shouldn’t reply back.

But you did say you weren’t argumentative or rude. I think you were. I think some of your responses were unnecessary.

That is my point.

Seriously. Think about that. And I have not been rude or unkind in what I have said.

Merely an opinion.

I shan’t comment any further. My point is clear.

You just don’t like it.

And you have enough to deal with apparently.

Right gotcha, I am perfectly entitled to reply but on the other I must make sure I am not rude or argumentative no matter how rude posters are to me, in case a random poster 34 pages down the line has a sudden burst of desire to point out to me the error of my ways.

So glad we got that ironed out.

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 17:02

@Melsmith2000

Possibly could be having an affair.
ffs
Poorlykitten · 22/06/2021 17:03

I think it’s odd to be so constantly obsessed with a post that you feel you need to ‘call out rudeness’. If anyone is being argumentative it’s Sayonething. Like a dog with a bone.

EarringsandLipstick · 22/06/2021 17:04

@Melsmith2000

Possibly could be having an affair.
😂😂😂

If you're not trying to be funny, then you've won MN bingo.

God, is there a thread about a DH/DP on MN that doesn't include this line?

Ps OP, fair play to you for sticking with this. I cannot believe some of the insane replies. You've handled both the situation, and the responses here, well

Hope things are a bit better now.

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 17:09

@EarringsandLipstick I see so many posters get hounded and flounce off, never defending themselevs and it always infuriates me! Or they loose their shit and start swearing/name calling which gives ammo to the posters who are deliberately riling them. So I must admit I do feel compelled at times to stick up for myself, particularly if it is unfair!

Sometimesfraught82 · 22/06/2021 17:20

@candyflossss
Are you the op?

Sorry I’ve lost track

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 17:21

[quote Sometimesfraught82]@candyflossss
Are you the op?

Sorry I’ve lost track[/quote]
no

Sayonethingtypeanother · 22/06/2021 17:22

And still only seeing what you want to.

You can argue and be rude as much as you like.

But if you do - then own it instead of being mealie mouthed and saying you weren’t.

Clear enough?

And fwiw - the affair thing was daft but you could start to see how it would be an attractive thought…

EarringsandLipstick · 22/06/2021 17:24

@Sayonethingtypeanother

And still only seeing what you want to.

You can argue and be rude as much as you like.

But if you do - then own it instead of being mealie mouthed and saying you weren’t.

Clear enough?

And fwiw - the affair thing was daft but you could start to see how it would be an attractive thought…

Give it a rest. I'm not sure what your beef with OP is. As she says herself, she's responded to some out there posts, and people being offensive.

I don't see why you decide she's being rude and why you're so irked in any case.

Scaredycatmoo · 22/06/2021 17:30

Were you @IAmDaveTheSerialShagger then?!

Scaredycatmoo · 22/06/2021 17:31

I am 4 months pregnant with a one year old, we share a house, a car, a life. This last month has not been great no, and yes I did feel very let down by him this weekend but I also did say him coming in at half 5 in the morning was not a common occurence and the reason I was so irritated this time was because it was the first time in a long while I had pre arranged something for myself.

But you post this.
I’m so confused Grin
Doesn’t take much!

candyflossss · 22/06/2021 17:32

@Sayonethingtypeanother

And still only seeing what you want to.

You can argue and be rude as much as you like.

But if you do - then own it instead of being mealie mouthed and saying you weren’t.

Clear enough?

And fwiw - the affair thing was daft but you could start to see how it would be an attractive thought…

only one of us as far as I can see arguing and being rude.

I thought you were no longer commenting?