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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want us not to wear shoes in the house?

245 replies

NCShoes · 17/06/2021 20:15

As soon as I walk through the door, I take my shoes off and put slippers on. My partner on the other hand will wear shoes throughout the whole house, and doesn't really take them off until going to bed.

It drives me mad but if I mention anything it can turn into an argument and it's just me 'moaning'. But I hate the thought of walking around outside then walking through the house, on the carpet etc.

The carpet is only a couple of years old and is already looking a bit crap so we're going to get it cleaned but then I think 'what's the point when you're still going to be wearing shoes all around the house?'
Am I being a bit moany?

OP posts:
RichTeaCheddars · 17/06/2021 21:46

Florescent pink trainers with non marking soles. Perfect.

www.adidas.co.uk/super-sala-boots/G55910.html

cunningartificer · 17/06/2021 21:47

Gosh this is so interesting. When I was a child shoes off would have been seen as weird and unnecessary—muddy or dirty outdoor shoes would be changed for indoor shoes (like plimsolls in school) but the idea of inviting people to dinner and telling them to take off their party shoes so as to come in your house….! So rude!

Now things seem to have changed and we have a shoe rack at our front door and most guests tend to lose the shoes… but I’d never insist.

Especially for older people I think it feels undressed to take them off. When people visit, often the visitors mean there is cleaning afterwards and carpets are no different. Never found my guests tread filth in so far…. Though we love our wooden floors perhaps because of this whole issue.

Isn’t having carpets on the floor a bit like having rushes down when it comes down to it? They always get dirty and are hard to clean. Give me a wooden floor and a rug every time.

Jessica60 · 17/06/2021 21:47

The amount of people I see spitting on the floor in the town centre is disgusting. I don't want their body fluids in my home

EmeraldShamrock · 17/06/2021 21:48

@RichTeaCheddars Good job. 👍
I doubt he'll venture outside wearing those.

storminabuttercup · 17/06/2021 21:50

We're shoes off. Im with you. The dog thing is irrelevant as I'm assuming your DH doesn't come in the house then sit and lick his shoes clean like dogs do to their paws?

StoneofDestiny · 17/06/2021 21:51

Agree - don't want outside crap in my home and on my carpets.
I wouldn't be comfortable wearing outdoor shoes all day and night - feet need air.

RoseMartha · 17/06/2021 21:53

YANBU

I hate shoes worn indoors it is gross. We always take them off as soon as we step in the door.

SarahSteedman82 · 17/06/2021 21:54

I agree with you also, I have never understood why anyone would wear outside shoes in the house, we all take our shoes off in the porch and then slippers, socks or bare feet in the rest

GOODCAT · 17/06/2021 21:55

We are shoes off. Would your partner go for slipper socks or some nice slippers that don't look like slippers instead? Does he/she ever compromise on other things? Do they do the cleaning and have they ever bought flooring?

Justgorgeous · 17/06/2021 22:11

I just don’t get how people walk around their homes in their shoes. I find it grim. Everyone I know, including my teenage boys’ friends take their shoes off when they come in and I do when I go to anyone’s house.

TellmewhoIam · 17/06/2021 22:15

@UhtredRagnarson

I’m with you Op. but my Dc don’t agree and the (rightfully) point out that our dog wears her outside footwear inside too Grin
It's been years since I licked the underside of my feet clean...

Seriously though, shoes off / house shoes.

What's outdoors remains outdoors.

goddessofmischief · 17/06/2021 22:16

I was brought up taking shoes off when you get home. The first time I went to an ex boyfriend's house his mother called me "posh" for taking my shoes off after entering. Apparently after I left she said "Bet she's all fur coat and no knickers that one". Scouse family Grin

PattyPan · 17/06/2021 22:24

Yanbu. And if he continues to wear shoes indoors he needs to pay for the carpets to be cleaned regularly because shoes on carpet is grim!

dayslikethese1 · 17/06/2021 22:24

I find it weird that ppl leave shoes on all around their houses. Up to them I guess but I wouldn't like it either OP if it was my house.

Gettingbiggerandbigger · 17/06/2021 22:34

YABU my DH wears shoes all the time as instructed by his podiatrist. My DDs podiatrist also recommended she wear shoes in the house too as slippers are not supportive. The only reason I don’t wear shoes in the house is because I like being bare footed.

Macncheeseballs · 17/06/2021 22:36

Do dogs have to take their shoes off too?

touma · 17/06/2021 22:37

People who wear shoes indoors have dirty houses, and no one can change my mind because it's the truth.

4amWitchingHour · 17/06/2021 22:38

I didn't mean to insinuate AT ALL that you're moany! Just that I know my husband would be / is!

Xioxio · 17/06/2021 22:41

@Gettingbiggerandbigger

YABU my DH wears shoes all the time as instructed by his podiatrist. My DDs podiatrist also recommended she wear shoes in the house too as slippers are not supportive. The only reason I don’t wear shoes in the house is because I like being bare footed.
They have medical reasons but they are still traipsing dirt on from outside. Yuck.
touma · 17/06/2021 22:41

@Macncheeseballs

Do dogs have to take their shoes off too?

Our dog waits in the porch and hands us her paws to wash every time she comes in either from a walk or from the back garden. She's so sweet, and I think she enjoys the extra attention of us cleaning her feet to be honest 😅 but dogs can be trained to wait to have their paws cleaned before coming back into the house.

We have tiled flooring throughout the downstairs, and the dog doesn't go upstairs anyway or go on the couch. But we do have rugs so I like for her paws to be nice and clean when she comes in.

Prepared to be told I'm a neat freak, but I am and I'm happy!

JackieWeaverHandforthCouncil · 17/06/2021 23:03

YANBU. At all.

ncforthispost1 · 17/06/2021 23:21

Shoes off!!!!!! always.

99victoria · 17/06/2021 23:38

Tbh, I have far more interesting things to do with my time than even notice if my daughter or OH are wearing shoes in the house. I take mine off usually because I prefer to walk around in bare feet than to wear shoes but I figure my daughter and my OH are both adults so they will make their own decision about what they put on their feet. Why would it be anything to do with me?

We only have one carpeted room in the house - if the floors are dirty, one of us will clean them. Seriously, how can people get invested in stuff like this?

DeathStare · 17/06/2021 23:41

I really don't get the shoes off thing at all. When us it ever acceptable to insist someone removes clothing? It's also illogical. If the person has sat down outside the house - bus, park bench, cinema seat - their trousers are as contaminated as their shoes. Do they need to remove their trousers before sitting on the sofa? If they've learnt against anything - bus seat back, wall, - their top is equally contaminated. Again do you make them remove their top? Why not just ask everyone to strip naked on entering your house?

mrwalkensir · 17/06/2021 23:48

A US Wife Swap. One was very shoes off due to E.coli levels. She sounded mad the way they filmed it, but it makes sense. We moved into a house with fairly worn carpets 20+ years ago and meant to replace them. Now they actually need it. Pretty sure that that's down to our being shoes-off. Much less mechanical wear.