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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want us not to wear shoes in the house?

245 replies

NCShoes · 17/06/2021 20:15

As soon as I walk through the door, I take my shoes off and put slippers on. My partner on the other hand will wear shoes throughout the whole house, and doesn't really take them off until going to bed.

It drives me mad but if I mention anything it can turn into an argument and it's just me 'moaning'. But I hate the thought of walking around outside then walking through the house, on the carpet etc.

The carpet is only a couple of years old and is already looking a bit crap so we're going to get it cleaned but then I think 'what's the point when you're still going to be wearing shoes all around the house?'
Am I being a bit moany?

OP posts:
NigellaSeed · 17/06/2021 20:59

Yanbu. If he won't wear slippers, why can't he buy new shoes that are just for indoors.

TomorrowIsAnotherDae · 17/06/2021 21:03

I’m pleasantly surprised that so many people don’t wear outdoor shoes in the house Smile I remember posting on a thread a few years ago that I prefer not to wear outdoor shoes in my home and was called pathetic.

Ravenspeckingearly · 17/06/2021 21:03

I haven’t ever come across anyone who insists on shoes being removed at the door in real life

Really? Aside from DM I haven’t come across anyone who doesn’t ask. Don’t know any children who don’t automatically take their shoes off. We are a shoes off family, but I wasn’t brought up like that.
Totally with you OP. Shoes should be off inside.

bellsbuss · 17/06/2021 21:04

I'm really strict and don't even allow slippers on the carpets as even though I clean the hard floors everyday dirt still gets on the bottom of slippers and I don't want it walked into the carpets. OH and the children know shoes off at the door and slippers in the basket at the bottom of the stairs.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 17/06/2021 21:04

MiL is never seen without shoes. I think they are the first thing she puts on in the morning. I hate it!

I never ever wear outdoor shoes in the house. DH and I have slippers for winter.

Original poster
NCShoes · 17/06/2021 21:08

@TomorrowIsAnotherDae

I’m pleasantly surprised that so many people don’t wear outdoor shoes in the house Smile I remember posting on a thread a few years ago that I prefer not to wear outdoor shoes in my home and was called pathetic.
I don't think it's pathetic at all. It's your home and you want to keep it clean. The thought of walking all you crap outside on to the floors just feels horrible. I really don't like it at all. And I think you can really tell the difference when you go to someone's house and see the floors and carpets all clean and nice that they don't wear shoes in the house.
OP posts:
NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 17/06/2021 21:08

I don't insist upon people removing shoes because I've never had to (MiL excluded). Everyone I know seems to perceive it as socially the done thing to remove outdoor shoes when entering someone's home.

Original poster
NCShoes · 17/06/2021 21:10

@LemonRoses

Perfectly reasonable to choose to not wear shoes indoors. Not reasonable to force that view onto others.

I wear shoes indoors sometimes. I have bare feet at the moment, as it’s warm. I haven’t ever come across anyone who insists on shoes being removed at the door in real life.

I don't say for guests to take shoes off when they walk through the door. But if they're going upstairs I like them to take them off. Some automatically do it before going up but others will ask if we'd prefer them to take them off before going up.
OP posts:
midnight90 · 17/06/2021 21:10

We have the same issue in our house. Before we moved in together if I'd been outside I'd come home (to my parents home) and wear my shoes in the house till I wanted to take them off but my husband always takes his shoes off before stepping a foot in the house. Now we live together and he is always telling me off about wearing shoes in the house. I have gotten use to it and love putting my slippers on after a long day at work but sometimes I find it pointless if I have to go out in the garden or empty the bins ect constantly taking them off putting them back on again. I once stood on his toe in the kitchen after we went food shopping and I just carried the bag straight to the kitchen to unload and didn't really have time to take them off.

LilMidge01 · 17/06/2021 21:10

He walks around the house with carpet with his outdoor shoes on all day and thinks that's fine?
YANBU and not moany at all
I know some people are saying "shoes on" households are a thing (definitely shouldn't be!) but if there is a compromise to be had here, surely its the most disgusting habit (shoes on, on CARPET) should be the one to change. You've said the carpets already looking bad. What on earth does he do if it's been raining outside? Please tell me he takes his shoes off. Bleurgh!!!

Original poster
NCShoes · 17/06/2021 21:11

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

I don't insist upon people removing shoes because I've never had to (MiL excluded). Everyone I know seems to perceive it as socially the done thing to remove outdoor shoes when entering someone's home.
Yes I agree. I take mine off whenever I go into someone's house.
OP posts:
Shehasadiamondinthesky · 17/06/2021 21:13

Its disgusting wearing shoes in the house. All that dirt from outside being tracked all over the house.

bushhbb · 17/06/2021 21:16

@LilMidge01

He walks around the house with carpet with his outdoor shoes on all day and thinks that's fine? YANBU and not moany at all I know some people are saying "shoes on" households are a thing (definitely shouldn't be!) but if there is a compromise to be had here, surely its the most disgusting habit (shoes on, on CARPET) should be the one to change. You've said the carpets already looking bad. What on earth does he do if it's been raining outside? Please tell me he takes his shoes off. Bleurgh!!!
I didnt know how to phrase it but ^^

It's both their house. He shouldn't get the final say, when his habit is making the place dirty. He'll have to get used to indoor shoes.

The fact that OP tried to compromise and he still wore his 'indoor' shoes outside would enrage me. Thats some restraint you got there, OP

nosyupnorth · 17/06/2021 21:17

I'm a shoes off person too, but I don't get your mentality that there's no point cleaning the carpet if it's just going to get dirty again -- surely that's true of everything??????????

Original poster
NCShoes · 17/06/2021 21:19

@nosyupnorth

I'm a shoes off person too, but I don't get your mentality that there's no point cleaning the carpet if it's just going to get dirty again -- surely that's true of everything??????????
I do still want it to be cleaned. But would like to be a fresh start again of no shoes in the house. Certainly not on the carpets anyway.
OP posts:
Original poster
NCShoes · 17/06/2021 21:20

Thank you @bushhbb .. I agree.

OP posts:
Dobbyisahouseelf · 17/06/2021 21:23

YANBU Shoes off in this house.

jaundicedoutlook · 17/06/2021 21:27

Wearing shoes in the house is barbaric.

If DH tried it he’d be finding his shoes in the bin the next morning.

Jessica60 · 17/06/2021 21:35

I have bought a cheap pair of trainers that I only wear in the house

Xioxio · 17/06/2021 21:35

@LemonRoses

Perfectly reasonable to choose to not wear shoes indoors. Not reasonable to force that view onto others.

I wear shoes indoors sometimes. I have bare feet at the moment, as it’s warm. I haven’t ever come across anyone who insists on shoes being removed at the door in real life.

Really? It's grim to bring in dirt from outside. As a guest in my house I'd ask you to remove your shoes if you made your way through the hall without removing them of your own accord.

I don't have to ask for shoes to be removed generally. People either ask if they should (yes please) or just take their shoes off.

Alleycat02 · 17/06/2021 21:36

Ick ick ick, definitely no shoes in the house!
Besides in the dead of winter I don't bother with slippers, just socks or bare feet.

I would ask any guests (politely!) to take their shoes off when they come in but most people just do it automatically anyway, thankfully it seems like more of 'a thing' these days. I shudder at how much muck we walk through on our shoes outside even when they look clean!

notadr · 17/06/2021 21:39

I'm with you op. We're shoes off and actually I don't know anyone who is shoes on. We've had hard floor from the front door down the hall to the kitchen and have worn shoes in there when we've nipped back in. When I'v then cleaned it after you can see the dirt that comes up.

EmeraldShamrock · 17/06/2021 21:39

Use indoor shoes.
I hate slippers or bare feet, I change into my indoor trainers

userxx · 17/06/2021 21:40

@TomorrowIsAnotherDae

Shoes off in my house. There is shit, piss, blood, puke, whatever, trod into the streets where I live - the thought of treading the remnants of all sorts of crap around my home makes me 🤢

Yep, this is my my thinking too. Shoes off and keep the nastiness outside thanks very much. It doesn't happen though!

EmeraldShamrock · 17/06/2021 21:42

Make sure his next pair of indoor shoes are florescent pink.