to feel embarrassed about my age?

[17june2021]

I turned 25 in March. I know that’s young in the grand scheme of life, but I feel embarrassed by it. Is it just in my head?

I feel like people treat me differently now. I was 23 when the pandemic began and to a certain extent my life was put on hold so I’m still in the same position I was then. I’m definitely still in the same mind frame as I didn’t get the normal transition from 23-25.

I rent with my friends in London and get comments like “at your age?” “Why don’t you live with your boyfriend?” “Why are you still renting?”

I got excited about the June 21 restrictions easement, and my colleagues were like I need to grow up as I’m too old for clubbing, concerts and festivals etc I’m not 18 anymore. I feel generally like I’m being looked down on for not wanting to get married and settle down immediately.

I keep seeing things like this online, essentially suggesting I’m hitting my best before date

There’s more too. I know I sound ridiculous as I’m healthy and alive and others don’t get that opportunity - but can’t help but feel insecure about my age.

[Justwantanewname]

I don’t understand who’s commenting that it’s strange that you’re renting with friends at your age in London. When I was 25, also living in London, NONE of my friends were doing anything other than renting in flat shares. No one was cohabiting with partners yet, and certainly no one had bought their own place. Is it family making these comments? Maybe the previous generation?

[LittleTiger007]

I think it’s your colleagues who are in the wrong. Be confident and just do you

[Quietrebel]

Those comments are the most ridiculous crap I've come across!!! Your brain will only finish maturing at around 28-30.
You're a baby!

[therocinante]

At 32, I laughed reading your post (not in a mean way!). It's a load of nonsense, honestly - 25 is so young.

I've got friends living in houseshares in London - successful, earning 50k a year friends and 'still trying to get a break in acting and working part time in a coffee shop' friends. I've got friends married with 4 kids and friends who've just decided to have their first hot girl summer. I've got friends who jacked their sensible job in last year to go and work in a bar in Thailand and friends who are the head of HR for banks. I know people who live in a caravan in their friend's garden, at home with their parents, in a house they own with a mortgage or outright with inheritance, or a rented house or flat.

I've got friends who still get fucked up on ket at a weekend and go to raves and friends who have wine and cheese nights once a month with other couples. Ones who go on girls' holidays to resorts and ones who go camping and ones who go backpacking. I know people who are earning 100k a year and some who are going through uni and some who are on benefits. Some who have kids and some who have cats and some who can barely remember to water their plants. Everyone I know who goes to Glasto every year is 30+. The ones I know who go to Bangface and Creamfields are older. My cousin, who's 22, would rather die and likes to watch Netflix with a brew.

I lived in a houseshare til I was 27. I still go to festivals. I still go out. I have friends who are 21 and friends who are 50, it genuinely makes no difference.

There are no rules to being 25 or to being 'young enough'. If you enjoy your life as it is, that's fine. Ignore the 18 year olds, who are too young to realise life doesn't follow a specific set out plan and that you wither up and die at 25. Go to a festival, stick some glitter on your face, enjoy your houseshare, and have a lovely time! 💛

[notacooldad]

I think you need to step away from Twitter and zone out from your rather dim witted colleagues to be honest.
Anyway whats this transition from 23 to 25. I guess i missed that one.
Just concentrate on doing you.
Your post is as big if a joke as that twitter account.

[Packingsoapandwater]

I'm in my mid 40s. Even though I did a lot in my twenties and didn't marry or buy a house until my 30s, I still wish I'd done more, even stuff that as a bit bonkers, and not given a shit about social mores.

There's a lot of weird social and cultural pressures when you are young that are just a load of bullshit. Looking back, it felt a lot like tacit policing of behaviour.

I was very academic and serious, and by God, I wish I'd done a bar work season in Ibiza.

[godmum56]

the commenters are a bunch of rude folk and you should tell them so. That tweet is spam, the tweeter is trying to make you give them money.

[Wishimaywishimight]

Honestly, stop reading shit and stop navel gazing. You're young, fit, healthy, in the absolute prime of life. Do what feels right and sod the opinions of people who don't matter. I was going to pubs, clubs, parties until my mid 30's and enjoyed every second.

There are no 'shoulds' just live however you want and stop over-thinking and analysing. You won't always be this young so don't waste time worrying over nothing.

[Waxonwaxoff0]

Well I'm a mother about to turn 31 and I still like going out drinking and to festivals. Could not care less what anyone thinks of it.

[BrownEyedGirl80]

Hahahahaha

[1forAll74]

You can't be embarrassed about your age, and you can't do much about it either. Just don't listen to sheep brained people who talk rubbish, and do your own things in life..

[DoTheNextRightThing]

I'm 25. I live alone but most of my friends live with their parents never mind renting 🤔 sounds like the people around you are just arseholes. Life is too short, love. Do whatever you want and to hell with everyone else. And ignore that tweet, it's gross.

[InTheDrunkTank]

Bloody hell op. This is a forum if mainly middle aged women and you start a thread agonising about being 25? 😂

At least when you turn 40 you can look back at this thread and have a good laugh at yourself!

[Turtlesone]

Weirdly I felt the same when I turned 25. Now I look back and realise how ridiculous I was! I think maybe it was about where I was in my life? No stable job, didn’t know what I wanted but felt I should etc. When I turned 30 I wasn’t at all bothered and I’m still not (mid 30’s). Also I was still out drinking every weekend in my twenties and would probably still be now if I didn’t have small children! So anyone saying you’re too old for that is ridiculous. And I have lots of friends in their 30’s in London who still flat share!

[ThursdayWeld]

Your colleagues are weird. And it's perfectly normal to be flatsharing in London in your mid twenties!

The one thing you hopefully will do a you get older, is learn not to care what others think so much

[LadyJaye]

I'm 42, and spent most of my 20s and early 30s flying by the seat of my pants and loving it. Nobody is more surprised than me by the fact that I am now a proper adult with a senior role and a house and RAC membership and shit.

Interestingly, I'm seeing this 'uber-adulting' a LOT in younger people (so

[17june2021]

What's a normal transition from 23-25

Well just a gradual transition between life stages, instead of almost a time skip that the pandemic brought. For example the natural transition I had between 18-20 or 21-23.

During the pandemic my industry collapsed (events/travel) so I was made redundant/unemployed then had to change careers & take a pay cut - live on the breadline essentially. All the things I generally do to relieve stress weren’t allowed and it was depressing. As a result I feel like my life was placed on hold/regressed.

I am an extrovert so being stuck in a small flat for ~18 months was taxing and I think it will still take more time for me to mentally snap back.

The comments about my age just hit hard because I didn’t really see out 23 or 24 and now I’m 25. Almost feel like I wasted my “best years”. Though obviously there’s nothing I can do about it so I shouldn’t let it impact me.

[me4real]

IDK if these people are jealous or what. You're only young. Nothing wrong with clubbing etc 'at your age' or any age really.

Do what you want to do and definitely don't move in with any man unless and until you want to. xx

[SunglassesSeventy]

I'm 49 now. I remember when I was 25 someone asking me why I hadn't made more progress in my career and saying that I was no spring chicken.

I now look back and laugh.

Age 25 is really very very young. Do what you like at that age! Don't rush to be grown up or to live with boyfriends or do anything that you don't want to do. Enjoy your youth while you have it and do what pleases you, not other people.

[ghostyslovesheets]

yes YABU to let other peoples ideas, expectations and choices get to you - do what makes you happy - I got my first house at 28 (shared for 11 years before buying), last child at 38, I'm 51 - still got to clubs and festivals - stop worrying about expectations and go live your life!

[17june2021]

Yes there’s so much pressure for people my age to buy a house and have massive savings. I barely cover my living expenses let alone have a deposit!

[Thelnebriati]

This is peer pressure. Remember how it feels so that when you have kids you can help them resist it.

[17june2021]

Thank you all btw - I can see that I’m catastrophising

[me4real]

Almost feel like I wasted my “best years”

@17june2021 There are still plenty of those ahead of you. I hope you get to have some fun over the summer. You can catch up on what you missed when we're eventually allowed.

[Bluntness100]

Well I’m fifty two and go to gigs and festivals.

You’re not too old for those, but quite honestly you’re far too old to read shite like that Twitter link and believe it.