Boyfriend says I eat too much..aibu to think I don't?

[stealmysunshone]

He always has something to say about what I eat and bangs on I eat too much.
He eats 1 meal a day (if you can call it that ) and for his lunch 1 slice of small bread with 1 slice of ham and that's it all day till 6pm

Today for lunch I had a 2 egg omelette (medium eggs ) with 1/4 tomato and 1/4 online and 2 mushrooms with a small tin of baked beans (2/3 of the tin)
For breakfast I just had a banana

He said that lunch is too big and it's more like a tea time meal.
If I just had 1 slice of bread with ham I would be shaky

For tea I'm having chicken with veg and potatoes
And a snack I've got a count on us 90 cal choc thing.

Aibu here? Is this too much ?
Is this normal ?
Every time I try and argue my case he says
My lunch is a plate full and too much

What is wrong with him? It doesn't sound like you eat a huge amount and he obviously has eating issues. All incredibly odd.

He eats 1 meal a day (if you can call it that ) and for his lunch 1 slice of small bread with 1 slice of ham and that's it all day till 6pm

This is a million miles from normal. Small children eat more than this.

He clearly has a disordered eating and attitudes towards food. And if you're not careful, you will end up suffering from disordered eating as a result of his criticism.

I'd tell him that either he STFU about what you're eating, or the relationship is over.

@godmum56

I don't think its right or helpful to be getting into how much the OP eats....that's a red herring...its the BF's food issues that are the problem here and they won't be reversed by science or argument because they are not rational.

The thing is though, OP’s AIBU actually is all about what she eats.

She isn’t posting because the boyfriend is annoying her, she’s posting because she thinks she her diet might be wrong.

So it’s actually exactly right and helpful to be getting into what she eats - and more importantly, her knowledge and feelings about that.

It’s the irritating boyfriend that’s the red herring.

The issue, is that OP has a diet that may or may not be healthy and doesn’t have the confidence in it to focus on the boyfriend’s nonsense, instead of questioning herself.

The lunch sounds fine.
A banana for breakfast - possibly not.
Chicken, veg & potatoes - who knows?! If you’re trying to lose weight and that’s breaded chicken and the potato portion is huge and slathered in butter, maybe not.

Your boyfriend has issues with food. He is deliberately or inadvertently projecting them on to you.

The OP weighs 10 stone at 5ft 7, so unlikely to be on a serious weight loss mission

I think your food intake is fine TBH. He sounds controlling and nasty. TBH this would be a deal breaker for me .Your future together is full of food! Dinner at home ,eating out ,a lunchtime picnic .Holidays at hotels ,eating with friends and so on ,its a PITA with someone judging you like that!

What a strange guy. You eat really well!! I put away far more food than you do and snack like it’s going out of fashion. I am 9.5 stone and 5’5 so we probably have similar BMI.

It sounds like you both have unhealthy eating behaviours, but that he is perhaps further along the spectrum and crossing into the disordered eating bracket.

You know you're not eating too much. Have you told him not to comment on what you're eating? If so, what did he say? If not, why not?

@stealmysunshone

I have no idea what his weight is tbh It's the pints that's his problem I'm 10 stone at the min,5 ft 7 I wouldn't mind loosing a couple of pounds but not bothered I try and get my steps in every day

Do you mean he eats very little but drinks a lot? That is troubling if that's what you mean. Your food intake is fine.

@BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand

The OP weighs 10 stone at 5ft 7, so unlikely to be on a serious weight loss mission

Well, she said that she wouldn’t mind losing a few pounds, but isn’t bothered. It all seems rather joyless and intense - to be logging everything on MFP if you don’t need to actively control your calorie count.

Far better to have a general idea of what is OK to eat for maintenance (e.g. knowing that chicken, potato and veg is fine, but having a 2 person pizza every night is not) and just doing that, with adjustment when you can see weight gain, or feel it in your clothes fit, or see it from an occasional regular weigh-in.

People who are a healthy weight that they’re happy with, but who religiously log a quarter of a tomato on MFP are not, in my opinion, entirely free of “disordered eating”.

[quote stealmysunshone]@Wroxie I have my fitness plan and I put everything in and I'm always 1300-1400 so I don't know where your getting 800 from [/quote]
It sounds like you both have issues with food control

Are you gaining weight, losing or maintaining? That's how you know whether you're eating too much, not by listening to your boyfriend.

Definitely not too much. Most of us need more than a slice of bread and ham. I'd be shaky and hangry too. Your diet sounds fine.

I have a bigger appetite than dp. Saying that he probably snacks more than me but I have larger meals. I'd bite his head off he said something 😂

Tell him you'll eat him if he doesn't shut up lol

He'd be an ex-BF I'm afraid. I couldn't have someone policing my food, especially when they obviously have, if not an eating disorder, then certainly disordered eating

Tell him to f*ck off.

You eat what you eat and it's none of his business.

Your diet is very healthy, you could maybe even eat more as you're quite active. He on the other hand is not eating enough and has a very poor diet thatched lead to a multitude of issues such as brittle bones. I'm a qualified personal trainer, feel free to show him this comment.

So, does he have an issue with drink, too, op?

Why is he trying to control your food intake?? Sounds a serious red flag to me. Of course you’re not eating too much

he sounds like he's got eating disorder.
he need to see the doctor or at least dietician.

Maybe I'm over guessing on the app
But potatoes alone for me is showing as 400 cals
Chicken 250 cals

Anyway I'm not going to let his ways get inside my head.
It's making me a bit neurotic

He likes a drink twice a week but can easily have 9-10 pints each time his out
So has a bit of a beer belly and would rather scrimp on food and drink his calories

How can he criticise what you eat when he drinks so much. What does he say if you criticise his drinking?

Run for the hills - sorry OP. Having an eating disorder is one thing but combined with controlling behaviour / projection of issue onto someone else, something entirely different

Wow a controlling boyfriend with an eating disorder and a drink problem who is headed for nerve and/or liver damage and/or cardiovascular disease.

Luckily since he's also controlling and weird, you don't need to feel guilty about dumping someone even though they will sooner or later be facing some horrible health challenges due to the fact that he has no idea how to look after himself.

Everyone is different. Tell him to mind his own business.