DH pulled my skirt up - AIBU to feel angry?

[Undecidedandtorn]

Just before getting indoors from a trip out today my husband pulled my dress up and flashed my pants. He said that he had checked and there wasn't anyone coming down the street who could see (which I of course didn't know) but when I turned around there were some people up the road - he said they were too far away to see but I'm not 100% sure this is true (I'm 99% sure its true).

Its been about 3 hours and I am still really angry about this even though he has apologised. AIBU?

Hang on @oioisaveloy108 you said you find me ‘odd’ for saying I would be humiliated, but you don’t like someone suggesting you don’t have much self-respect?

I don’t think you’re in a position to get huffy about what others are concluding about you when you too have labelled people. 🤷🏼‍♀️

@oioisaveloy108 do you read the daily mail?

Omg people are so sensitive 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

Wouldn't make a difference to me whether it was in public or in private. It's humiliating. Not LTB territory if an isolated incident and apologised for but I wouldn't like it.

I imagine he thought you'd see it as a naughty joke - particularly as he checked no one could see. You've made it clear you didn't appreciate it. I'd forgive and forget now.

I don't think you have the brain capacity to accept people think differently to you.

You're the one who thinks people with different boundaries to you are odd, and their husbands will cheat.

But I'm not playing chess with pigeons any more.

What a dick. It would still be awful even if it wasn't in public.

We have a long way to go before men understand that you cannot sexually assault your wife or girlfriend any more than you can have an unsolicited grope of a stranger.

@waterlego

Hang on *@oioisaveloy108* you said you find me ‘odd’ for saying I would be humiliated, but you don’t like someone suggesting you don’t have much self-respect?

I don’t think you’re in a position to get huffy about what others are concluding about you when you too have labelled people. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Never said I was bothered by someone insinuating I have no self respect.

What I find bizarre is how hypocritical people are to preach about how everyone can create their own boundaries, and then try and insult those who don't follow their idea of perfection

I would probably have found it funny after the initial shock. If he made a habit of doing stuff like that, that would be a different matter.

No wonder so many men have affairs if women clearly turn into total fun sponges.

Fucking hell. Everyone's relationship is different. What one person thinks is okay, another might not agree with. OP has said this is not something her husband has ever done and she's obviously upset and you're essentially saying that if he has an affair it's because she's a "fun sponge".

OP you're NBU to be upset with it. A lot of women would be. However, you've told him he's upset you, he's apologised and I doubt he'll do it again. I'd try and let it go if you can .

Silly twat.

I would be looking for an opportunity to pull his trousers down in public. Preferably when his arms are full of stuff.

Funny how you're all about 'we are both allowed our opinions are boundaries' but then start insinuating I've got no self respect. Bizarre

Hey, I was only having a joke with you!!!! 😂😂😂😂 LOL, you're no fun. LOL. Wouldn't be surprised if your DP is cheating on you.

Aaaand that's us back to square one.

Everyone, please ignore oioisaveloy108. Engaging only encourages him.

@Undecidedandtorn I know you've said he's normally ok, but is there other stuff he does that you're not happy with?

Am I the only one who would find this funny! Lol but I guess it depends what your relationship and personalities are like. If it was me I would be plotting my revenge to keg him on the way out next time haha! And make sure he had baggy shorts on to make it easier for me!

I'd much rather my husband be lifting my skirt up for a bit of a thrill and excitement than anyone else's! 😉

It might have been a tad embarrassing but I wouldn't still be raging hours afterwards. He must have just felt a bit excited in the moment but I should say he won't be doing that to you again anytime soon 😂

Go and give him a hug and make up. Not the end of the world love. Life's too short. He probably feels like a told off school kid now

Hmmm. I think it depends on context really? It is a strange thing to do in a street, yes.

I was wearing a short-ish dress today and when I was making the drinks (we had guests in the garden), my husband came in and smacked me on the bum (not hard, but with his hand under my skirt). He will often do this. Now I’m thinking I should have been incandescent and sent everyone home?

Erm, it wouldn't really bother me if my husband did it, but that's because I'd know he would never disrespect me or mean me any harm. I mean, it really depends on the spirit in which it was done.

If he checked no one was around/looking, and just gave in to a "pull her pigtails" naughty impulse, then it could have been a kind of slapstick moment that was perfectly good-natured and playful. Maybe spring/summer is in the air, you know what it does to the birds and the bees!

Only you can tell, OP. If you think it was intended maliciously to deliberately humilitate you, or represents the straw that broke the camel's back in terms of his general lack of respect for you, or you have concerns that he is some kind of creepy pervert who is finally acting out, then that's a different matter altogether!

how would he know people arent looking out their windows or something-its a twatty thing to do

Sounds like it was just a bit of fun. I wouldn't be too annoyed, unless he had done in front of people.

[quote oioisaveloy108]**@MrsTerryPratchett* @JesusInTheCabbageVan*

Oh yes, totally understand both your points. Now can you understand that some women would find this absolutely hilarious and find those that don't, those that jump to public humiliation, a bit odd? [/quote]
???

Yes people have all sorts of things that are fine/ funny etc in their relationships that others might not like, or would hate etc.

The point is that you know each other very well, what sort of things you do and don't find funny/ sexy etc.

In this case the OP was WTF. It's clearly not the sort of thing they do to each other.

The fact that you would find your partner pulling your skirt up in the middle of the street is neither here nor there.

I'm having a really heavy period at the mo so the (nosy) neighbours might get an eyefull of arse, white sanitary wings wrapped around knickers, and a bit of a blood smudge depending on where my legs were when he pulled it up!

Who on earth would find this sexy??!!

I mean outside of a really iffy 80s porn video?